Beautiful Death
Viewing comments for Chapter 10035 "Not my fault"from birth I have longed for death
4 total reviews
Comment from davisr (Rhonda)
You are completly right about the subject of this poem. Unless you have been in an abusive relationship, you don't understand the hold they have over you. Everything is always your fault until you start to believe it yourself. Only the strong survive, my friend. Like you, I am one of those survivors!
Rhonda
reply by the author on 06-Jul-2015
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You are completly right about the subject of this poem. Unless you have been in an abusive relationship, you don't understand the hold they have over you. Everything is always your fault until you start to believe it yourself. Only the strong survive, my friend. Like you, I am one of those survivors!
Rhonda
Comment Written 06-Jul-2015
reply by the author on 06-Jul-2015
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Thank you.
The violence here was to a sister I love very much.
I feel guilt and sadness.
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That is very sad for you sister and you both.
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Now other than fighting the aging process we are both content.
As you have found, peace comes when we can control our own lives.
Comment from Gypsy Blue Rose
I like your style of poetry, it is very unique. You have a very powerful message, many women suffer abuse from the one person that was suppose to love them.
The first paragraph needs a question mark.
Good job!
reply by the author on 03-Jul-2015
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I like your style of poetry, it is very unique. You have a very powerful message, many women suffer abuse from the one person that was suppose to love them.
The first paragraph needs a question mark.
Good job!
Comment Written 03-Jul-2015
reply by the author on 03-Jul-2015
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Again thank you.
Comment from Anthonyjbraun
I can tell that there is a lot of emotion here and that you have a great perspective when it comes to abuse; that is to say that it is either something you are familiar with or that you have heard about. This is a powerful piece. It's rhymes well and it conveys intense emotion. Some of it is a little choppy to read, mostly in the middle, but otherwise it's a good piece overall.
reply by the author on 03-Jul-2015
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I can tell that there is a lot of emotion here and that you have a great perspective when it comes to abuse; that is to say that it is either something you are familiar with or that you have heard about. This is a powerful piece. It's rhymes well and it conveys intense emotion. Some of it is a little choppy to read, mostly in the middle, but otherwise it's a good piece overall.
Comment Written 03-Jul-2015
reply by the author on 03-Jul-2015
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Thank you, I am trying to work on the choppy.
I appreciate your suggestions if you have any.
Comment from Serendipity!
no a word you say (Did you mean not?) Is this a true story that you are relating? You get the message across very well without flowery 'speeches' almost in a deadpan 'voice.' I can almost imagine the monotone record that goes round and round in a person like this' mind. I'd encourage you to try and have all your lines the same length of syllables.
Make him pay... then use the money to escape to in order to get training of some sort to create a better, happier life.
reply by the author on 03-Jul-2015
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no a word you say (Did you mean not?) Is this a true story that you are relating? You get the message across very well without flowery 'speeches' almost in a deadpan 'voice.' I can almost imagine the monotone record that goes round and round in a person like this' mind. I'd encourage you to try and have all your lines the same length of syllables.
Make him pay... then use the money to escape to in order to get training of some sort to create a better, happier life.
Comment Written 03-Jul-2015
reply by the author on 03-Jul-2015
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Thank you, I can only write what I perceive to be true.
I was born into violence and spent almost 30 years in my marriage with it.
The abused in this is not me, she seems now to be content and he is still paying.
I believe the abuse stopped years ago, she is still with him.
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But you are still facing it?!?!
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But you are still facing it?!?!
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It is always there, the abused in this case is someone important to me.
I watch just to keep her safe.
I believe she is happy now.
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All I can --and will--do is pray.
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All I can --and will--do is pray.
