Vision and Sound: Their Stories
Viewing comments for Chapter 63 "Leopold Seeks Justice, More Plague"Two souls that meet as strangers on earth.
13 total reviews
Comment from Nosha17
Everyone might be posting and reviewing like wildfire and I am the reverse-I am taking a break from all that. I have been sick for a month with bronchitis, now recovered, but had an eye operation yesterday, so have to take it easy for a bit. I am concentrating on my books which are now almost ready. Just thought I'd keep you in the picture in case I don't always review, haven't forgotten you. I bet when you were at school you never thought you would become such a history buff about that particular period! Great story with such living characters. I never tire of it, hope it continues. Most enjoyable as always. Faye
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Everyone might be posting and reviewing like wildfire and I am the reverse-I am taking a break from all that. I have been sick for a month with bronchitis, now recovered, but had an eye operation yesterday, so have to take it easy for a bit. I am concentrating on my books which are now almost ready. Just thought I'd keep you in the picture in case I don't always review, haven't forgotten you. I bet when you were at school you never thought you would become such a history buff about that particular period! Great story with such living characters. I never tire of it, hope it continues. Most enjoyable as always. Faye
Comment Written 08-Jan-2015
Comment from seaglass
I only follow 3 novels, you're being one of them. Two others I followed seems to have fizzled out. The rest are poets. I can only review a couple of hours daily so I limit. I like this way. if we have to looses them, I prefer natural causes.
What would happen I they had a child? Would it be an eternal spirit as well? or could one of them be born in another life as a child to the other....guess we will see.
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I only follow 3 novels, you're being one of them. Two others I followed seems to have fizzled out. The rest are poets. I can only review a couple of hours daily so I limit. I like this way. if we have to looses them, I prefer natural causes.
What would happen I they had a child? Would it be an eternal spirit as well? or could one of them be born in another life as a child to the other....guess we will see.
Comment Written 07-Jan-2015
Comment from Phyllis Stewart
WOW! So the Oracle was the head honcho all along, a cardinal! PERFECT! Now Julie and Val can die and go on to a new life at some other time. Very good job on this sc
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WOW! So the Oracle was the head honcho all along, a cardinal! PERFECT! Now Julie and Val can die and go on to a new life at some other time. Very good job on this sc
Comment Written 07-Jan-2015
Comment from Sasha
Excellent work with this chapter. I think you should continue on with the book, but possibly jump further ahead in the next life, provide a little background information as you go along.
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Excellent work with this chapter. I think you should continue on with the book, but possibly jump further ahead in the next life, provide a little background information as you go along.
Comment Written 07-Jan-2015
Comment from GracieAnn
Mikey, it is amazing how the characters seem so real living and breathing in this difficult time in history. Great depiction of opposing forces with solid and believable dialogue. Nice , my friend. :0 GracieAnn
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Mikey, it is amazing how the characters seem so real living and breathing in this difficult time in history. Great depiction of opposing forces with solid and believable dialogue. Nice , my friend. :0 GracieAnn
Comment Written 07-Jan-2015
Comment from flylikeaneagle
Michael: Yeh! Vision and Valerius have a little time out for rest n hand holding n recovery. The Oracle was a man of God and Leopold found his demon since he lost his heart to serve others.
Maybe, the Oracle can have a church revival in the town to help bring in the importance of reading and knowing Jesus, the word. Join the family of believers is God's will, not the building, but the people, celebration in a meal. Invite the soldiers and touch the community in love. Leopald had so much hate...switch the story to love, God's love reigns.
After the dark ages, the people had a revival in the word. The countries read the word. The world history book talks about revival and relationship to Jesus ... high school class. Leaders rise up to spread the good news. Could start in your story!
We have a blizzard here in South Minnesota and temperatures are minus 10. I still have to walk three dogs who get cold feet. Stay warm and be in health Michael. I enjoy your stories...get this published! flylikeaneagle
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Michael: Yeh! Vision and Valerius have a little time out for rest n hand holding n recovery. The Oracle was a man of God and Leopold found his demon since he lost his heart to serve others.
Maybe, the Oracle can have a church revival in the town to help bring in the importance of reading and knowing Jesus, the word. Join the family of believers is God's will, not the building, but the people, celebration in a meal. Invite the soldiers and touch the community in love. Leopald had so much hate...switch the story to love, God's love reigns.
After the dark ages, the people had a revival in the word. The countries read the word. The world history book talks about revival and relationship to Jesus ... high school class. Leaders rise up to spread the good news. Could start in your story!
We have a blizzard here in South Minnesota and temperatures are minus 10. I still have to walk three dogs who get cold feet. Stay warm and be in health Michael. I enjoy your stories...get this published! flylikeaneagle
Comment Written 07-Jan-2015
Comment from gypsycaravan
I would kind of like to see this now end with the reader left to wonder if Julia and Valerius die or survive and then have us anxiously await their next lives. The when and where and how of their next connection should be exciting, also. Nice work, mikey.
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I would kind of like to see this now end with the reader left to wonder if Julia and Valerius die or survive and then have us anxiously await their next lives. The when and where and how of their next connection should be exciting, also. Nice work, mikey.
Comment Written 07-Jan-2015
Comment from nordicgirl
Finally. This is packed with twists I did not see coming. I knew there was more to the Oracle but this was a big surprise, a good one. Finally, Leo dead as hell. It doesn't look good for our stars. Sad. Great writing.
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Finally. This is packed with twists I did not see coming. I knew there was more to the Oracle but this was a big surprise, a good one. Finally, Leo dead as hell. It doesn't look good for our stars. Sad. Great writing.
Comment Written 07-Jan-2015
Comment from Antoine Charlemaine
Great chapter, Michael. You writing engrosses me, though it is also sad. Your author notes re Red Plague are helpful. Thanks for that detail.
Leopold finally gets his comeuppance. It probably didn't warrant a 'violence' notification, though.
I think you should end this part as Book 1 and begin again.
A few suggestions:
'The young priest who had tended to Leopold now let him wander around ranting unattended.' A little awkward. Perhaps, 'The young priest who had tended to the ranting Leopold now let him wander, unattended.'
'To your knees in atonement(,) for your damnation comes right quick."'
'Two soldiers went to confirm what everyone already knew(:) Leopold certainly had died horrifically.'
'Please take our brother (into) your Kingdom...'
'She had learned enough about the red plague to know this did not bode as good news.' 'She had learned enough about the red plague to know this news did not bode well.'
'One of the Bishops and the young priest who had tended to Leopold had the spots as well.' How about, 'One of the Bishops(,) and the young priest who had tended to Leopold, (also) had spots.'
Thanks, Michael.
Ant.
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Great chapter, Michael. You writing engrosses me, though it is also sad. Your author notes re Red Plague are helpful. Thanks for that detail.
Leopold finally gets his comeuppance. It probably didn't warrant a 'violence' notification, though.
I think you should end this part as Book 1 and begin again.
A few suggestions:
'The young priest who had tended to Leopold now let him wander around ranting unattended.' A little awkward. Perhaps, 'The young priest who had tended to the ranting Leopold now let him wander, unattended.'
'To your knees in atonement(,) for your damnation comes right quick."'
'Two soldiers went to confirm what everyone already knew(:) Leopold certainly had died horrifically.'
'Please take our brother (into) your Kingdom...'
'She had learned enough about the red plague to know this did not bode as good news.' 'She had learned enough about the red plague to know this news did not bode well.'
'One of the Bishops and the young priest who had tended to Leopold had the spots as well.' How about, 'One of the Bishops(,) and the young priest who had tended to Leopold, (also) had spots.'
Thanks, Michael.
Ant.
Comment Written 07-Jan-2015
Comment from Michaelk
Are you kidding me, 'Should I make this a book?' it's already a book. I am amazed at how far this story has come, and more amazed when I realize that I have read every single word of it.
The Oracle is a Cardinal? I did not see that one coming. What better way to see the truth than through the eyes of a peasant. That was quite a stroke of brilliance. I think it's unfair that Julia and Valerius have been unable to truly express their love for each other (if you know what I mean) in this section. Maybe you could do a much shorter section in modern day that is like a chick flick where they get married and live happily ever after. That could be the ending of your book. Vision and Sound would have run the full gamut of human experience.
reply by the author on 07-Jan-2015
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Are you kidding me, 'Should I make this a book?' it's already a book. I am amazed at how far this story has come, and more amazed when I realize that I have read every single word of it.
The Oracle is a Cardinal? I did not see that one coming. What better way to see the truth than through the eyes of a peasant. That was quite a stroke of brilliance. I think it's unfair that Julia and Valerius have been unable to truly express their love for each other (if you know what I mean) in this section. Maybe you could do a much shorter section in modern day that is like a chick flick where they get married and live happily ever after. That could be the ending of your book. Vision and Sound would have run the full gamut of human experience.
Comment Written 07-Jan-2015
reply by the author on 07-Jan-2015
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I got carried away with this section somehow. In the original book you have it just about right. They go through some more lifetimes and the climax is set in modern times. Sound is already on Earth and Vision intervenes in his life. Then she comes to Earth as a much younger female, but they hook up anyway in spite of how pissed off it makes everyone but them. The ending is somewhat a true story and it is the one part of the original that I wrote well. So, I'm at a loss. I didn't think I could follow the Soldier/Slave story, but I came up with this. I have several other sections. Hahaha. I think book two might be the way. I don't know. I still have a cold and three hundred reviews and uncountable responses.... mikey
