Vision and Sound: Their Stories
Viewing comments for Chapter 17 "Physician & Patient: Pt. 4"Two souls that meet as strangers on earth.
14 total reviews
Comment from ProjectBluebook
The picture looks like it is painted on canvas. She most definitely came back as a heart breaker. it reads smooth as silk, effortless, i noticed as I read. Noticed that it is reader friendly for those with vision problems. Not I. The grammar looks flawless as I read the prose. A plot is slowly building, like the pressure inside a volcano releasing it's lava. I'm feeling a grip on this. Grip is what grabs you and makes you want to read more. Lots of detail and side thoughts. Nice poem included that is unforced and flows like a river cascading down water falls. You can tell that you love writing, that is good. What the Agents seek, and they can tell if you truly do it for you and the people. Just an observation. The physician must be one of the reincarnated souls. i speculate. There is a chemistry and psycic connection. Evidently, the two souls have meet in previous lives, that's how he knows her. His inner thought tells him -- he loves her. he must wash away these peculiar feelings in due respect for his community, a respectable physician. She must be sound? She hears things? Your grammar looks tight as a banjo. Saw no errors. Over all, an excellent written chapter. The suspense is building, progressing as the novel goes, I have witnessed. Count your doubloon. do loco
reply by the author on 01-Oct-2014
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The picture looks like it is painted on canvas. She most definitely came back as a heart breaker. it reads smooth as silk, effortless, i noticed as I read. Noticed that it is reader friendly for those with vision problems. Not I. The grammar looks flawless as I read the prose. A plot is slowly building, like the pressure inside a volcano releasing it's lava. I'm feeling a grip on this. Grip is what grabs you and makes you want to read more. Lots of detail and side thoughts. Nice poem included that is unforced and flows like a river cascading down water falls. You can tell that you love writing, that is good. What the Agents seek, and they can tell if you truly do it for you and the people. Just an observation. The physician must be one of the reincarnated souls. i speculate. There is a chemistry and psycic connection. Evidently, the two souls have meet in previous lives, that's how he knows her. His inner thought tells him -- he loves her. he must wash away these peculiar feelings in due respect for his community, a respectable physician. She must be sound? She hears things? Your grammar looks tight as a banjo. Saw no errors. Over all, an excellent written chapter. The suspense is building, progressing as the novel goes, I have witnessed. Count your doubloon. do loco
Comment Written 01-Oct-2014
reply by the author on 01-Oct-2014
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You have it. The doctor is actually sound and the girl is vision. She sees more than she hears. Glad to hear that it pulls you in. It took off in a different direction than the original story. I haven't even looked at the original in a couple weeks. Yes, they've met and the book is a series of stories about their various meetings over the millenia. It ends up in current times. mikey
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Wow! From the dark ages -- to modern times. What a major difference that is. They must meet a few times from 500 AD to 1,500 AD. that's a millenium. You can branch out in different directions too. I read the bad news about Maureen being in a coma. Read it in one of Dean's poems. It was an awesome presentation in dedication to Gungalo and Maureen. Maureen was my first fan. Then Eigle, then you. i t is very sad. I called her Tango Dancer, she liked to do the tango. Said she could do one mean -- tango! Vision and Sound. Are there four senses? Touch? Smell? you could add two more characters, Touch and Smell. I get wacky ideas, Mikey. Later...
Comment from Sasha
I actually believe there are people all around us just like Julia and, like Julia, are not aware that they are recalling events that took place in the past. This is truly fascinating and I do hope love enters the picture...everyone deserves to be loved.
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I actually believe there are people all around us just like Julia and, like Julia, are not aware that they are recalling events that took place in the past. This is truly fascinating and I do hope love enters the picture...everyone deserves to be loved.
Comment Written 01-Oct-2014
Comment from robina1978
As always a pleasure to read one of your chapters. This one, as you mention yourself, has a touch of reality: back in the old days I suppose the church would consider mentally ill witches.
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As always a pleasure to read one of your chapters. This one, as you mention yourself, has a touch of reality: back in the old days I suppose the church would consider mentally ill witches.
Comment Written 30-Sep-2014
Comment from seaglass
This continues to develop very well. The picture is perfect. I can't begin to guess where you will take this but it doesn't seem that they have long lives.
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This continues to develop very well. The picture is perfect. I can't begin to guess where you will take this but it doesn't seem that they have long lives.
Comment Written 29-Sep-2014
Comment from gypsycaravan
I wonder if two souls ever meet and both are cognizant of a former life's connection. That would be exciting. The story continues holding my attention. Good work.
A couple edits:
1. We can talk of it together and together perhaps we can come to a better understanding.--I would delete the 2nd "together" for a better flow to the sentence.
2. Valerius barely had enough breath to great Trellitia when she came out on the stoop to great him.--Both of the "great" should be "greet"
reply by the author on 29-Sep-2014
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I wonder if two souls ever meet and both are cognizant of a former life's connection. That would be exciting. The story continues holding my attention. Good work.
A couple edits:
1. We can talk of it together and together perhaps we can come to a better understanding.--I would delete the 2nd "together" for a better flow to the sentence.
2. Valerius barely had enough breath to great Trellitia when she came out on the stoop to great him.--Both of the "great" should be "greet"
Comment Written 29-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 29-Sep-2014
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Good tips, thank you. Great/greet. I do that all the time for some reason! I don't know of any case first hand. I know of someone that met a spirit in real life that had intervened in their life twenty-five years earlier. The person was born about eight years after the spirit helped in something. It spoke and touched his hand. He met her and recognized the voice and the touch all those years later. That is what led to this story. Cool stuff! mikey
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Have you ever read Brian Weiss's book 'Many Lives, Many Masters?' Great book on this very subject.
Comment from Nosha17
You handled the writing of this difficult situation with their meeting very well, it was most believable. I like all the characters, they are realistic and likeable. Well narrated, interesting story line. Someone said to me today in a review, that they admired my range as I can write equally well on any topic. I am not attempting to brag, I am too modest for that, I simply want to point out that the same applies to you. You can also write on a great range of topics with ease. Most enjoyable. faye
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You handled the writing of this difficult situation with their meeting very well, it was most believable. I like all the characters, they are realistic and likeable. Well narrated, interesting story line. Someone said to me today in a review, that they admired my range as I can write equally well on any topic. I am not attempting to brag, I am too modest for that, I simply want to point out that the same applies to you. You can also write on a great range of topics with ease. Most enjoyable. faye
Comment Written 29-Sep-2014
Comment from adewpearl
You convey the inner thoughts of characters well and use dialogue to good effect
It is a most intriguing dynamic as she knows him in a way he has no recollection of knowing her
Brooke
reply by the author on 29-Sep-2014
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You convey the inner thoughts of characters well and use dialogue to good effect
It is a most intriguing dynamic as she knows him in a way he has no recollection of knowing her
Brooke
Comment Written 29-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 29-Sep-2014
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I'm very pleased to hear you mention the thoughts and dialogue. I've been working on that. A fun write for me. I'm glad you like it. Thank you, mikey
Comment from drivenbackward
No grammatical errors to report on this chapter. This chapter takes a different type of serious turn in a way. You have an interesting story here. I'm wondering if you already know the ending, or if you're just writing along the way.
reply by the author on 29-Sep-2014
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No grammatical errors to report on this chapter. This chapter takes a different type of serious turn in a way. You have an interesting story here. I'm wondering if you already know the ending, or if you're just writing along the way.
Comment Written 29-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 29-Sep-2014
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Not sure of the ending yet. The original story sits unviewed for a long time now. This is off in its own direction. I'm worried about it ending tragically all the time until the very last segment. But, she's crazy in the dark ages, the odds aren't in her favor. I usually end up going off in a different direction even with finished projects for some reason. mikey
Comment from flylikeaneagle
Michael: I like your story, being filled with more details and character profiles. I like your poem, "We've heard each others call." I like how Valerius gets advice from lady Trelletia. What happens next? Well written!
flylikeaneagle
reply by the author on 29-Sep-2014
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Michael: I like your story, being filled with more details and character profiles. I like your poem, "We've heard each others call." I like how Valerius gets advice from lady Trelletia. What happens next? Well written!
flylikeaneagle
Comment Written 29-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 29-Sep-2014
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Hi. I'm delighted that you're enjoying my story. This is fun to write for me. I like ancient times like this and seeing how they came up with treatments and medicines and things. Thank you so much and for all the stars!! Smiles. mikey
Comment from nordicgirl
Another spectacular chapter. The story is moving along beautifully, or I should say, both stories. In addition the underlying issues are being addressed expertly without drawing undue attention to them. The points sre being made as part of the story. This is top of the line original writing. Nothing on this site is like this.
reply by the author on 29-Sep-2014
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Another spectacular chapter. The story is moving along beautifully, or I should say, both stories. In addition the underlying issues are being addressed expertly without drawing undue attention to them. The points sre being made as part of the story. This is top of the line original writing. Nothing on this site is like this.
Comment Written 29-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 29-Sep-2014
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That is everything I am trying to do! I'm beside myself smiling to myself. Hahaha. How encouraging. Thank you so very much. mikey
