Yosemite
Viewing comments for Chapter 42 "Kodiak Bears and Debates"Acts of war have plunged Earth into catastrophe.
16 total reviews
Comment from ragamuffin
It makes me wonder if we had a chance to do it all over again, regardless of why, would there really be that many that would want to work for peace and equality? I would hope so, but...
reply by the author on 12-Apr-2014
It makes me wonder if we had a chance to do it all over again, regardless of why, would there really be that many that would want to work for peace and equality? I would hope so, but...
Comment Written 12-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 12-Apr-2014
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I would hope so too. But, I have my doubts as well. Nothing seems to horrify us enough. mikey
Comment from faragon
The story is coming along great! I like the way you are developing not only the story line but the characters as well. The dialogue flows freely and naturally. I can't wait for the next chapter.
The story is coming along great! I like the way you are developing not only the story line but the characters as well. The dialogue flows freely and naturally. I can't wait for the next chapter.
Comment Written 10-Apr-2014
Comment from Tatarka2
I still think it's a movie. This chapter was well-told, setting the reader up for the ending but not giving anything away. I continue to suggest that the love story is a bit too schmaltzy. Love her, be attracted to her, but this is an action story. Show us, don't tell us, how special she is. I have an idea about the ending - it will be interesting to see if you have anything like the same idea.
reply by the author on 09-Apr-2014
I still think it's a movie. This chapter was well-told, setting the reader up for the ending but not giving anything away. I continue to suggest that the love story is a bit too schmaltzy. Love her, be attracted to her, but this is an action story. Show us, don't tell us, how special she is. I have an idea about the ending - it will be interesting to see if you have anything like the same idea.
Comment Written 09-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 09-Apr-2014
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I have one too, I hope its not too nuts!! hahaha. I can always fix it in edit right??? mikey
Comment from Sankey
Tremendous story mate. Great chapter. Still going along nicely. Wondering just what the climax will be.
Only one spag which is amazing huh! In the introduction... The(-y) more moderate of the group, including Johnny
Tremendous story mate. Great chapter. Still going along nicely. Wondering just what the climax will be.
Only one spag which is amazing huh! In the introduction... The(-y) more moderate of the group, including Johnny
Comment Written 08-Apr-2014
Comment from GracieAnn
Mikey, this is certainly a climatic point in the story with critters on one side and two-legged ones on the other. The conclusion could go either way. (In the real world, utopia will never be achieved. That can't happen until Jesus comes back with swords a-blazing and He reigns for a thousand blissful years of peace.) But to make the ending palatable for many, a happy one may be in order or the harsh reality of mankind's incessant need to dominate will be repeated. Well done. :0 GracieAnn
reply by the author on 08-Apr-2014
Mikey, this is certainly a climatic point in the story with critters on one side and two-legged ones on the other. The conclusion could go either way. (In the real world, utopia will never be achieved. That can't happen until Jesus comes back with swords a-blazing and He reigns for a thousand blissful years of peace.) But to make the ending palatable for many, a happy one may be in order or the harsh reality of mankind's incessant need to dominate will be repeated. Well done. :0 GracieAnn
Comment Written 08-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 08-Apr-2014
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I'm hoping for a rest between man's never ending march towards messing everything up! I know eventually they'll find something to fight about!!! Even mankind needs a little vacation in Yosemite once in awhile. mikey
Comment from l.raven
Ok It's war...who will win the land they live on ???...and now the wild life is showing up...but that might not be so bad...be interesting how this will end...has the bird told you yet..???...lol...another great write...very well written Luff Linda xxoo
Ok It's war...who will win the land they live on ???...and now the wild life is showing up...but that might not be so bad...be interesting how this will end...has the bird told you yet..???...lol...another great write...very well written Luff Linda xxoo
Comment Written 07-Apr-2014
Comment from ProjectBluebook
There are a lot of lines that tickle me fancy. "I'm Fortunado Esquievel." I like them words. 'lions and Tigers and Kodiac bears, oh my!' that's a dandy, made me giggle. I like the way you described them platforms, reminded me Water World, remember that huge city on water. Maybe, them bombers can bomb the crap out of them ships but there will still be subs, a hostile threat. Guess, I will just have to wait and see what Mikey has in that brain. Does look grim.
There are a lot of lines that tickle me fancy. "I'm Fortunado Esquievel." I like them words. 'lions and Tigers and Kodiac bears, oh my!' that's a dandy, made me giggle. I like the way you described them platforms, reminded me Water World, remember that huge city on water. Maybe, them bombers can bomb the crap out of them ships but there will still be subs, a hostile threat. Guess, I will just have to wait and see what Mikey has in that brain. Does look grim.
Comment Written 07-Apr-2014
Comment from Phyllis Stewart
>>All that I was could be found on the surface.
Very insightful... you're right about the ads trying to make us NEED their junk.
>> what passed between Christine and I
Should be Christine and ME. You can always tell whetehr to use ME or I by removing the other person:
A feeling came over I? NO. A feeling came over me? YES. So... a feeling came over Chris and me. That is correct. Of course "between" is harder to use, but ME is still correct.
>> People that speak about love to predators end up being eaten by them.
Very true... which is why you can't negotiate with Islamic terrorists.
>>I feared that the men with the guns would rather see the world end than accept peace with us, their sworn enemy.
This is true of Iran. They are even glad they get to die killing "infidels" since they get their 70 virgins in Heaven. LOL! What a bunch of idiots, but dangerous idiots.
Hey, I have an idea.... why doesn't Johnny make an army of bears to greet the armada? LOL! :)
>>All that I was could be found on the surface.
Very insightful... you're right about the ads trying to make us NEED their junk.
>> what passed between Christine and I
Should be Christine and ME. You can always tell whetehr to use ME or I by removing the other person:
A feeling came over I? NO. A feeling came over me? YES. So... a feeling came over Chris and me. That is correct. Of course "between" is harder to use, but ME is still correct.
>> People that speak about love to predators end up being eaten by them.
Very true... which is why you can't negotiate with Islamic terrorists.
>>I feared that the men with the guns would rather see the world end than accept peace with us, their sworn enemy.
This is true of Iran. They are even glad they get to die killing "infidels" since they get their 70 virgins in Heaven. LOL! What a bunch of idiots, but dangerous idiots.
Hey, I have an idea.... why doesn't Johnny make an army of bears to greet the armada? LOL! :)
Comment Written 07-Apr-2014
Comment from Nosha17
I hope it ends with a peaceful solution, I don't like wars and things! You should take a break when it is finished so you can edit it in peace. I don't know how you keep up with your daily output etc. It was an interesting and well written chapter, I can definitely see this as a screenplay for a movie. Hope you will still chat when you've hit the big time. I told the guy in my bank that he would have to learn to show me more respect when I am not far behind J K Rawlings in the literary stakes!!! He laughed! Many a true word has been said in jest. Wishful thinking! Faye
I hope it ends with a peaceful solution, I don't like wars and things! You should take a break when it is finished so you can edit it in peace. I don't know how you keep up with your daily output etc. It was an interesting and well written chapter, I can definitely see this as a screenplay for a movie. Hope you will still chat when you've hit the big time. I told the guy in my bank that he would have to learn to show me more respect when I am not far behind J K Rawlings in the literary stakes!!! He laughed! Many a true word has been said in jest. Wishful thinking! Faye
Comment Written 07-Apr-2014
Comment from Sasha
Sorry, you won't be getting any help from me. It appears those that know what they are doing, are doing a bang up job provided the help you ask for. Great chapter that showed vividly the dire situation they are in. Who to trust and who not to trust...not a pleasant position to be in. I anxiously look forward to the next installment.
Sorry, you won't be getting any help from me. It appears those that know what they are doing, are doing a bang up job provided the help you ask for. Great chapter that showed vividly the dire situation they are in. Who to trust and who not to trust...not a pleasant position to be in. I anxiously look forward to the next installment.
Comment Written 07-Apr-2014