Reviews from

Yosemite

Viewing comments for Chapter 41 "How's The Weather?"
Acts of war have plunged Earth into catastrophe.

16 total reviews 
Comment from GracieAnn
Excellent
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Mikey, this is a good continuance of the story line and begins to paint a very dire picture of a very foreboding possibility. The drama is high. Well done. :0 GracieAnn

 Comment Written 08-Apr-2014

Comment from ravenblack
Excellent
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You know, I was just joking about Godzilla (but then again, so were you- a giant radioactive fart aimed at the ozone-hah!). Keep using humor effectively!

 Comment Written 07-Apr-2014

Comment from CR Delport
Excellent
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This sounds more like that anything outside the dome is to be considered enemy until they know what they're dealing with. This is another well written chapter.

 Comment Written 07-Apr-2014

Comment from l.raven
Excellent
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Sure excuses...excuses...LOL...Michael it is fine...your doing great....so who coming to dinner ????...who's on the ships and how many ??? and can we hold our own ??? Hummmm...just keep it coming..no time to sleep..LOL....sooo very well written you...Luff Linda xxoo

 Comment Written 06-Apr-2014

Comment from Tatarka2
Excellent
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I keep trying to review this, but my computer's doing something crazy. I think this is the best chapter yet. You have knit together not only this story, but also commented on the mindset of mankind in general ("us" against "them). Very good work. I think it's that kind of writing on several levels that will eventually make this an important work. The only reason this isn't a 6, for me, is that it does seem a bit hurriedly written, like you didn't take time to worry much about punctuation, spelling, etc. I do agree that that stuff isn't very important when you have a big idea and you want to get it down on paper (computer) and move on to write the rest of the story.

 Comment Written 06-Apr-2014

Comment from Phyllis Stewart
Excellent
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We, the people. No, the people aren't in charge of a damn thing in spite of what the people that are in charge, tell you. They, are in charge of you, the people.

How true this is! We don't need a worldwide destruction to know that...We didn't jump into the skillet by pushing the big red button. Rather, we are like frogs in a pan of warm water, getting hotter all the time as the new tyranny cooks us, and by the time we all realize it, we'll be nice and tender and ready for them to eat. I'd jump out of the pan, but there's nowhere to go.

 Comment Written 06-Apr-2014

Comment from seaglass
Excellent
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Seems to be going great for me. I saw nothing to correct and I can't think of anything to suggest. Hope they get it all resolved before that baby is born. LOl

 Comment Written 06-Apr-2014

Comment from Sasha
Excellent
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This chapter was very clear and I felt the desperation of everyone facing invasion and potential destruction very well. It is a good think I am not there with them because I would be of no help whatsoever...nada! I found one small nit:

The may not even make it here...should be They not the...


 Comment Written 06-Apr-2014

Comment from Nichola
Excellent
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It looks like evil twins playing rubber ducky in a bathtub. - great line!

That sounded so comforting and correct to call our group of merry warriors, "us". The whole problem with "us" is that it creates another unfortunate group of people called, "them". The time had come to decide what kind of a world everyone would be living in. The world still existed, and so did humanity, for the time being. A famous quote ran through my mind now. It came from a time in my youth: "I don't know what weapons World War III will be fought with, but World War IV will be fought with sticks and rocks." - great paragraph!

Good luck with the next chapter.

Nichola




 Comment Written 06-Apr-2014

Comment from nelliesellie
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

THEY ARE FACING A BIG PROBLOEM. Who is guilty? Who is innocent? They really can not ask everyone they meet. The innocent may fight harder than the guilty. It is wise to include as many people in the 'we' that you can get. It is also wise to identify as many of 'them 'as you can. Great work.

 Comment Written 06-Apr-2014