Yosemite
Viewing comments for Chapter 24 "Plans, Hostages and More Hostages"Acts of war have plunged Earth into catastrophe.
19 total reviews
Comment from Petriesan
I still don't get what the hell they want with us or this I suppose. This is what they want, the land. I suppose it beats Siberia.
I think I would change the last sentence to "It beast SIberia" or something similar
walking right into an unset trap is a great line
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I still don't get what the hell they want with us or this I suppose. This is what they want, the land. I suppose it beats Siberia.
I think I would change the last sentence to "It beast SIberia" or something similar
walking right into an unset trap is a great line
Comment Written 22-Mar-2014
Comment from nelliesellie
It looks like a lot of enemies are appearing. The Russians are used to fighting in this kind of country. They may know Americans are not going to protect these people. Other countries may decide this area is up for grabs. The first battles should send warning shots off to the rest of the world.
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It looks like a lot of enemies are appearing. The Russians are used to fighting in this kind of country. They may know Americans are not going to protect these people. Other countries may decide this area is up for grabs. The first battles should send warning shots off to the rest of the world.
Comment Written 21-Mar-2014
Comment from adewpearl
Good dialogue as they try to figure out the motives of the Russians
for the team to try and sneak - try to sneak
You build suspense well as they try to figure out just who these approaching people are and what they might be up to
Brooke
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Good dialogue as they try to figure out the motives of the Russians
for the team to try and sneak - try to sneak
You build suspense well as they try to figure out just who these approaching people are and what they might be up to
Brooke
Comment Written 21-Mar-2014
Comment from Michaelk
Good chapter. At first I was t sure if these 'rooskies' were friend or foe, but they proved which with their actions. Rhonda made a perfect distraction, even though its not clear if she meant to be or not. Your tension level has been high for a while now, maybe it's time to let the reader take a breather.
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Good chapter. At first I was t sure if these 'rooskies' were friend or foe, but they proved which with their actions. Rhonda made a perfect distraction, even though its not clear if she meant to be or not. Your tension level has been high for a while now, maybe it's time to let the reader take a breather.
Comment Written 21-Mar-2014
Comment from ravenblack
Slim Pickens movie reference- are you by any chance referring to the wacky flick, The Russians Are Coming, The Russians Are Coming? And of course, I just glanced at the author notes and realized that , well, the first few lines of this review are worthless. Just one typo- the italicized line - come one should be come on. 9th paragraph- the pov shift to you ( did you see anything) should be avoided.
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Slim Pickens movie reference- are you by any chance referring to the wacky flick, The Russians Are Coming, The Russians Are Coming? And of course, I just glanced at the author notes and realized that , well, the first few lines of this review are worthless. Just one typo- the italicized line - come one should be come on. 9th paragraph- the pov shift to you ( did you see anything) should be avoided.
Comment Written 21-Mar-2014
Comment from Sankey
Another good chapter, mate. definitely got me sucked in fer shore. Be good to see where it all goes.
Some spags back again sigh!
woods became fi(l)led
The(y) looked just as surprised
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Another good chapter, mate. definitely got me sucked in fer shore. Be good to see where it all goes.
Some spags back again sigh!
woods became fi(l)led
The(y) looked just as surprised
Comment Written 21-Mar-2014
Comment from faragon
Your little group seem to be flourishing. Setting up a little community and putting to use the various talents of the residents. I like the silent form of communication as it doesn't seem like it could be duplicated unless you have been taught it. Maybe if they plan on staying in that location for awhile they might consider setting up some "bobby traps" around the settlement.
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Your little group seem to be flourishing. Setting up a little community and putting to use the various talents of the residents. I like the silent form of communication as it doesn't seem like it could be duplicated unless you have been taught it. Maybe if they plan on staying in that location for awhile they might consider setting up some "bobby traps" around the settlement.
Comment Written 21-Mar-2014
Comment from l.raven
OK You!!! NO one in our group hets hurt...Ok maybe hurt,,but not dead...I know these people...LOL...I am one of them...LOL...really a great story Michael...let's see what is next...very well written you!!! Luff Linda xxoo
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OK You!!! NO one in our group hets hurt...Ok maybe hurt,,but not dead...I know these people...LOL...I am one of them...LOL...really a great story Michael...let's see what is next...very well written you!!! Luff Linda xxoo
Comment Written 20-Mar-2014
Comment from Marillion
I got your Dr. Strangelove reference, Mikey! Well done. I'm looking forward to the impending battle scene with the Russians, and it's good to see Rhonda back again, at least for now. Nice build-up!
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I got your Dr. Strangelove reference, Mikey! Well done. I'm looking forward to the impending battle scene with the Russians, and it's good to see Rhonda back again, at least for now. Nice build-up!
Comment Written 20-Mar-2014
Comment from Phyllis Stewart
I nudged Christian
I looked at Christian
Don't you mean Christine?
This whole scene is verrry confusing as to what is actually happening at your end. And how could the Russians have a shelter set up SO CLOSE to your camp that none of you noticed???????????
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I nudged Christian
I looked at Christian
Don't you mean Christine?
This whole scene is verrry confusing as to what is actually happening at your end. And how could the Russians have a shelter set up SO CLOSE to your camp that none of you noticed???????????
Comment Written 20-Mar-2014
