History and Myth
Viewing comments for Chapter 27 "Culture Clash"Poems that tell stories of long ago
13 total reviews
Comment from aagalloway
This poem is excellent. It tells a wonderful story and has great rhyme and rhythm. Very sophisticated in structure. I love the repetition of some lines which adds to the dramatic effect. I hope to read more of your poems. Thanks for sharing.
reply by the author on 11-Mar-2014
  |
This poem is excellent. It tells a wonderful story and has great rhyme and rhythm. Very sophisticated in structure. I love the repetition of some lines which adds to the dramatic effect. I hope to read more of your poems. Thanks for sharing.
Comment Written 10-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 11-Mar-2014
-
Thank you aagalloway.
Comment from STEPHEN A CARTER
A proud people/plains 'p' alliteratives entice
Lead/lessons learned long 'l' "
horseman's myth remains the soft 'm's
wolf/buffalo the opposite 'o' sound
Geological/ historical rhymed
COmanche, SiOux, ArapahO again the 'o's are all different
Living/land
TALL teepees kept off cold and rains
Tumbled/tragic tale the 't's
When/wagon trains
horseman/myth The juxitposed 'm's
DISREFARDED VALUES CAUSING pain
A bit awkward: CONSIDER:
Guns and NUMBERS overflow
EXTINGUISH with TRIBAL distain
In anguish/ancestral love the alliterative
Like the English version better of:
"Enesta!
Tsigoti galvladi atloyadi. "
Regards:
reply by the author on 11-Mar-2014
|
A proud people/plains 'p' alliteratives entice
Lead/lessons learned long 'l' "
horseman's myth remains the soft 'm's
wolf/buffalo the opposite 'o' sound
Geological/ historical rhymed
COmanche, SiOux, ArapahO again the 'o's are all different
Living/land
TALL teepees kept off cold and rains
Tumbled/tragic tale the 't's
When/wagon trains
horseman/myth The juxitposed 'm's
DISREFARDED VALUES CAUSING pain
A bit awkward: CONSIDER:
Guns and NUMBERS overflow
EXTINGUISH with TRIBAL distain
In anguish/ancestral love the alliterative
Like the English version better of:
"Enesta!
Tsigoti galvladi atloyadi. "
Regards:
Comment Written 10-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 11-Mar-2014
-
Thanks again for a detailed look and understanding.
Comment from Darkhorse555
heart touching words In anguish the ancestral spirits cried
As these majestic cultures nearly died. very beautifully penned piece
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2014
|
heart touching words In anguish the ancestral spirits cried
As these majestic cultures nearly died. very beautifully penned piece
Comment Written 22-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2014
-
Thank you Dark horse.
Comment from Jean Lutz
Maybe the Father of all did cry at the sight of His children fighting instead of sharing the best of what they both had. One having learned to live at peace in their environment -- yet the other may have introduced advancements which could possible cause both to live longer. Lots to ponder in this exceptional writing.
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2014
 |
Maybe the Father of all did cry at the sight of His children fighting instead of sharing the best of what they both had. One having learned to live at peace in their environment -- yet the other may have introduced advancements which could possible cause both to live longer. Lots to ponder in this exceptional writing.
Comment Written 22-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2014
-
Thank you very much Jean for the review and high regard,
Comment from Pilot2Pen
Thanks for the education on the Rondeau Redouble. You took a complex fixed format and created a poem that reads so well. None of the rhymes appear forced. The poem flows smoothly from start to finish.
The defeat of the Indian cultures while sad, was inevitable.
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2014
|
Thanks for the education on the Rondeau Redouble. You took a complex fixed format and created a poem that reads so well. None of the rhymes appear forced. The poem flows smoothly from start to finish.
The defeat of the Indian cultures while sad, was inevitable.
Comment Written 22-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2014
-
Thank you Pilot2Pen. Very cool moniker.
Comment from James Dooney
Now this is interesting. I love a good work about war and history and all those kinds of things and for me, this does the trick. I love the structure and the flow of things here. You have done well !
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2014
|
Now this is interesting. I love a good work about war and history and all those kinds of things and for me, this does the trick. I love the structure and the flow of things here. You have done well !
Comment Written 22-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2014
-
Thank you very much Hames.
Comment from Selina Stambi
Your author notes always enhance the experience of your poems, Tom.
This is a complex form indeed - is it awful of me just to enjoy it for the great poem it is, and not really care about the rhyme scheme, etc.??
So sad, what colonization has brought about - not just in North America.
Sonali
extinction with tribe distain .. disdain?
reply by the author on 18-Jan-2014
|
Your author notes always enhance the experience of your poems, Tom.
This is a complex form indeed - is it awful of me just to enjoy it for the great poem it is, and not really care about the rhyme scheme, etc.??
So sad, what colonization has brought about - not just in North America.
Sonali
extinction with tribe distain .. disdain?
Comment Written 18-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 18-Jan-2014
-
Thank you Sonali. Well that's putting it too lightly I know.
Comment from rod007
This truly deserved six stars not only for the power and emotional language in this piece but also for the hard work you put in your historical research, especially your rendition of the Cheyenne words. Bravo.
reply by the author on 18-Jan-2014
|
This truly deserved six stars not only for the power and emotional language in this piece but also for the hard work you put in your historical research, especially your rendition of the Cheyenne words. Bravo.
Comment Written 18-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 18-Jan-2014
-
Thank you rod. It took me 3 hours just to post this, not counting writing it, so I really appreciate that you liked it so well.
-
Tom, hard work is what it is all about. I have spent a lot of time researching Nepal, which is where "Metamorphosis" is set to give the upcoming episodes more context.
Comment from GregoryCody
WOW. You are a frickin genius and a poet. This is beautiful. Your word choices are perfect and your form is spot on. You paint a fantastic story AND you do it in perfect form!! How?? Wow. You need to enter this in a contest somewhere. Great piece. Great.
reply by the author on 17-Jan-2014
|
WOW. You are a frickin genius and a poet. This is beautiful. Your word choices are perfect and your form is spot on. You paint a fantastic story AND you do it in perfect form!! How?? Wow. You need to enter this in a contest somewhere. Great piece. Great.
Comment Written 17-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 17-Jan-2014
-
Thank you Gregory. I appreciate you enthusiasm. I am very pleased with those stars.
Comment from Shirley E Kennedy
What a proud and impressive race these many Indian tribes were part of and it's so sad to look back at the needless destruction and devastation of their races.
History is so important and culturally significant yet vast rheems of it have been lost in the annals of time.
I am impressed by your subject choice and Rordeau Redouble format.
reply by the author on 17-Jan-2014
|
What a proud and impressive race these many Indian tribes were part of and it's so sad to look back at the needless destruction and devastation of their races.
History is so important and culturally significant yet vast rheems of it have been lost in the annals of time.
I am impressed by your subject choice and Rordeau Redouble format.
Comment Written 17-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 17-Jan-2014
-
Thank you Shirley.
