To Cherish Thorns
Viewing comments for Chapter 44 "Stiletto Heel"Free Verse Poetry
18 total reviews
Comment from cinderbella
This is hilarious. Falling at a ladies feet and getting noticed... yep, I loved it ... and I just love it when a man falls at my feet. *smiles*
The poem at first felt somewhat dark and serious, and I couldn't wait to see the end. It was so lighthearted and entertaining, very unexpected but I wouldn't change a word, Mikey. :) Sandra
reply by the author on 08-Nov-2013
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This is hilarious. Falling at a ladies feet and getting noticed... yep, I loved it ... and I just love it when a man falls at my feet. *smiles*
The poem at first felt somewhat dark and serious, and I couldn't wait to see the end. It was so lighthearted and entertaining, very unexpected but I wouldn't change a word, Mikey. :) Sandra
Comment Written 08-Nov-2013
reply by the author on 08-Nov-2013
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Yeah. We get silly in love sometimes. hahaha. glad you like it, mikey
Comment from Leineco
Powerful (teasing) set up
wonderfully descriptive allusion to the subway system
great establishment of obsession
and finally, the moment!
elation, deflation, dismissal
The fa§ade of my hidden powers
crumbles.
And yet
hope aspires
My heart sings with joy;
for you noticed me.
Ahhh..the cruelty and possession
of unrequited love!
Nice Write :-)
reply by the author on 08-Nov-2013
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Powerful (teasing) set up
wonderfully descriptive allusion to the subway system
great establishment of obsession
and finally, the moment!
elation, deflation, dismissal
The fa§ade of my hidden powers
crumbles.
And yet
hope aspires
My heart sings with joy;
for you noticed me.
Ahhh..the cruelty and possession
of unrequited love!
Nice Write :-)
Comment Written 07-Nov-2013
reply by the author on 08-Nov-2013
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I am so pleased you liked this. I am even more pleased that you understood it perfectly. That is such a blessed relief to hear. I have received some strange responses. Ha! Thank you most kindly. mikey
Comment from Lovinia
Michael
You are one of my favourite free verse writers. I'm a fan of each and I find your styles so authentic to yourselves. I love this romance poetry and not my favourite genre. Your phrasing is so uniques yet full of clarity. Your words drew me to the ground and ...... bugger you, my eye got pierced. LOL Sorry, I shouldn't be flippant, I have met with this exact experience perhaps slightly different conditions ... though your poem draws me in two directions. The first, that glorious feeling of being in love with a God/Goddess and that fleeting moment when they 'noticed' me. The second is the darker version ... the doormat which gets stomped on. I read your poem as the first of course ... yet perhaps my love-blighted heart can't resist the alternate universe version. :))
"As I wish it after all my false denial.
As I feared in every cell.
As I couldn't stop anyway" - aaaah, the endless romantic ..... great lines.
"I careen through the poisoned underground currents,
holding my breath
with vague trepidation-
For I choose this pathway, somehow."
Stunning! Certainly draws the reader in, especially those who like the thrill of stepping outside their comfort zones. Exceptional wording. A delightful mini-romance in an incredible moment. I do hope there is no permanent damage to your eye.
Well done .... arouses so many emotions of love and the love-lorn ..... my heart palpitates. Warmest wishes & hugs - Lovi xoxoxo
reply by the author on 08-Nov-2013
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Michael
You are one of my favourite free verse writers. I'm a fan of each and I find your styles so authentic to yourselves. I love this romance poetry and not my favourite genre. Your phrasing is so uniques yet full of clarity. Your words drew me to the ground and ...... bugger you, my eye got pierced. LOL Sorry, I shouldn't be flippant, I have met with this exact experience perhaps slightly different conditions ... though your poem draws me in two directions. The first, that glorious feeling of being in love with a God/Goddess and that fleeting moment when they 'noticed' me. The second is the darker version ... the doormat which gets stomped on. I read your poem as the first of course ... yet perhaps my love-blighted heart can't resist the alternate universe version. :))
"As I wish it after all my false denial.
As I feared in every cell.
As I couldn't stop anyway" - aaaah, the endless romantic ..... great lines.
"I careen through the poisoned underground currents,
holding my breath
with vague trepidation-
For I choose this pathway, somehow."
Stunning! Certainly draws the reader in, especially those who like the thrill of stepping outside their comfort zones. Exceptional wording. A delightful mini-romance in an incredible moment. I do hope there is no permanent damage to your eye.
Well done .... arouses so many emotions of love and the love-lorn ..... my heart palpitates. Warmest wishes & hugs - Lovi xoxoxo
Comment Written 07-Nov-2013
reply by the author on 08-Nov-2013
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I am so thrilled with this review I cannot tell you. Your understanding of this piece delights me to no end. I am so used to blank stares and "what in the world are you talking about" that to actually hear someone that understands it is amazing. Yes, I am completely in the Alternative Universe. Of course, I call it "The Universe". I look so cool with this patch on. Man, the chicks dig a dude with a patch. Thank you so very, very much, mikey
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Ooooh yeah, I forgot for a minute that we chicks love eye patches and sexy scars.
You're welcome .... love your work. :)))
Comment from country ranch writer
WHAT ONES DOES FOR ATTENTION HE HE POOR EYE THOUGH HOPE YOU HAD A STEAK AND A DOC NEAR BY------------------------------
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reply by the author on 08-Nov-2013
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WHAT ONES DOES FOR ATTENTION HE HE POOR EYE THOUGH HOPE YOU HAD A STEAK AND A DOC NEAR BY------------------------------
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Comment Written 07-Nov-2013
reply by the author on 08-Nov-2013
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Hahaha. Where is a steak when you need one? No Doc. got an HMO. ha!
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HA HA
Comment from krys123
I must say that your poem is a very bizarre one. She steps you in your eyes with her stiletto heel and you tell yourself you like it and she's noticed you. Whatever turns you on. If this is just an expressionistic poem and I can understand. Thank you for sharing this with your fans, myself and other readers/writers. You have a good one and God bless Mikey.
AK
reply by the author on 07-Nov-2013
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I must say that your poem is a very bizarre one. She steps you in your eyes with her stiletto heel and you tell yourself you like it and she's noticed you. Whatever turns you on. If this is just an expressionistic poem and I can understand. Thank you for sharing this with your fans, myself and other readers/writers. You have a good one and God bless Mikey.
AK
Comment Written 07-Nov-2013
reply by the author on 07-Nov-2013
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Yes. You have it right. Just showing how far people go when they are crazy about someone. Silly, silly in love where you don't have any sense. They say hello as they pass by and it is the biggest event in the world! blessings, mikey
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Take care Mike and God bless
Comment from Sasha
Of course I must speak from the prospective of a woman, but we too know what it is like to endure anything just to be noticed. I really enjoyed this one. It is one, I am sure many can relate to.
reply by the author on 07-Nov-2013
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Of course I must speak from the prospective of a woman, but we too know what it is like to endure anything just to be noticed. I really enjoyed this one. It is one, I am sure many can relate to.
Comment Written 07-Nov-2013
reply by the author on 07-Nov-2013
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Us guys notice, believe me. We just don't have enough sense to tell you! I am glad this one was clear, I wasn't sure if people would get it. mikey
Comment from l.raven
Hi Michael, I do remember those days...I would walk in those heels and when I took them off I couldn't put my foot flat for hours...LOL...but you did get noticed...Love your poem...very well written...xxoo luff Linda xxoo
reply by the author on 07-Nov-2013
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Hi Michael, I do remember those days...I would walk in those heels and when I took them off I couldn't put my foot flat for hours...LOL...but you did get noticed...Love your poem...very well written...xxoo luff Linda xxoo
Comment Written 07-Nov-2013
reply by the author on 07-Nov-2013
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Glad you liked it. Yep. Getting noticed. Sometimes that is one's only desperate wish. mikey
Comment from tbacha58
The facade of my hidden power crumbles,
This line is so so deep, so amazing, beautiful, reading it , It made me think, yes , inside is the hidden real ME. Mike, its to good to be true.
My heart sings with joy;
for you noticed me.
Here those lines, made me think ,yes, i can be in a state of joy, as I have many who recognized me.
Beautiful amazing, Mike, so proud of you. Hugs Terry
reply by the author on 07-Nov-2013
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The facade of my hidden power crumbles,
This line is so so deep, so amazing, beautiful, reading it , It made me think, yes , inside is the hidden real ME. Mike, its to good to be true.
My heart sings with joy;
for you noticed me.
Here those lines, made me think ,yes, i can be in a state of joy, as I have many who recognized me.
Beautiful amazing, Mike, so proud of you. Hugs Terry
Comment Written 07-Nov-2013
reply by the author on 07-Nov-2013
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Thank you very much. I am glad you liked that line. That is the one that I liked too!! hugs back, mikey
Comment from emrpoems
you create great imagery and complement it with a picture so befitting. you succeeded in highlighting the emotions that torture men when they become intrigued with being in pursuit.
The accomplishment of being even noticed is so great that you would endure anything for it. Great free verse poem
reply by the author on 07-Nov-2013
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you create great imagery and complement it with a picture so befitting. you succeeded in highlighting the emotions that torture men when they become intrigued with being in pursuit.
The accomplishment of being even noticed is so great that you would endure anything for it. Great free verse poem
Comment Written 07-Nov-2013
reply by the author on 07-Nov-2013
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Thank you so much. You are exactly on the money and that delights me to no end. I always worry that no one is going to "get it". So very appreciated. warm regards, mikey
Comment from Green Lake Girl
Oh, boy! The lure and suggested romance of the stiletto. Only to be poked in the eye, followed by a murmured "sorry". Nicely done and great photo. (I am not a poet, so I can't comment much on structure, just content.)
reply by the author on 07-Nov-2013
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Oh, boy! The lure and suggested romance of the stiletto. Only to be poked in the eye, followed by a murmured "sorry". Nicely done and great photo. (I am not a poet, so I can't comment much on structure, just content.)
Comment Written 07-Nov-2013
reply by the author on 07-Nov-2013
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The structure is just a way to highlight things and guide the eye around. Something I have done since forever. It was the rage when I first started writing back in the day. So, I guess I just kept it. (the hair too!!) mikey
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I remember poetry class in high school--writing poems in circles, squares, whatever. Very hip at the time. I'm guessing you graduated from HS in the 70's? I graduated in the Bicentennial year. Our (naughty) motto: We're not pansies, we're not pricks, we're the class of '76. Ha!
