The Quadriplegic
A short war story28 total reviews
Comment from denhagan
This is a nice poem, written in the free verse style with good rhythm throughout the poem. Has a nice picture to accompany the poem.
reply by the author on 08-Oct-2013
This is a nice poem, written in the free verse style with good rhythm throughout the poem. Has a nice picture to accompany the poem.
Comment Written 08-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 08-Oct-2013
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Thanks, Dennis.
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You're welcome,
Dennis
Comment from xotic flotsam
this well penned poem explicitly spells out the random horror of war. the lad had no chance. service to freedom does not go unappreciated, including yours. his price was high. we are benefactors of his sacrifice. sixteen years old. unimaginable. you tell the story superbly. your free verse opens your work from which we may all learn. well done.
x
reply by the author on 08-Oct-2013
this well penned poem explicitly spells out the random horror of war. the lad had no chance. service to freedom does not go unappreciated, including yours. his price was high. we are benefactors of his sacrifice. sixteen years old. unimaginable. you tell the story superbly. your free verse opens your work from which we may all learn. well done.
x
Comment Written 07-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 08-Oct-2013
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Thank you, Exotic Flotsam, for your summary, your very kind words and for the six-star rating. All very much appreciated.
Comment from Eleanor Buron
The thought of that man having to live his life severely challenged, missing out on the freedom of movement and holed up in a care center - yes I can see why you feel haunted. That haunting is because you have deep compassion for him and others, I'm sure. I like the way the poem ends - "He had eventually become good at picking a winner." So matter of fact - simply stated, and these are the very reasons the ending is powerful.
reply by the author on 08-Oct-2013
The thought of that man having to live his life severely challenged, missing out on the freedom of movement and holed up in a care center - yes I can see why you feel haunted. That haunting is because you have deep compassion for him and others, I'm sure. I like the way the poem ends - "He had eventually become good at picking a winner." So matter of fact - simply stated, and these are the very reasons the ending is powerful.
Comment Written 07-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 08-Oct-2013
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Thank you, Eleanor, for your very kind words. v spent most of his waking hours studying the form and had an encyclopaedic knowledge which enabled him to amass a small fortune, most of which he donated to the hospital for various projects.
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Wonderful of him!! God bless him and you for I'm sure you have left an indelible mark of goodness in his heart and memory.
Comment from Selina Stambi
tf,
As the lines progressed, I was gripped by fascination. The concluding stanza of your free verse poem, clinched the ultimate triumph perfectly.
A touching story, related in a matter of fact manner. At no time were you maudlin, which is what makes this piece attractive, I think.
Well done!
Sonali
reply by the author on 08-Oct-2013
tf,
As the lines progressed, I was gripped by fascination. The concluding stanza of your free verse poem, clinched the ultimate triumph perfectly.
A touching story, related in a matter of fact manner. At no time were you maudlin, which is what makes this piece attractive, I think.
Well done!
Sonali
Comment Written 07-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 08-Oct-2013
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Thank you, Sonali, for your very kind words.
Comment from ravenblack
Wars are so senseless and none as senseless as the meat grinder that was ww1. To be hit by friendly fire, paralyzed so young. And now against all odds, picking winners- really speaks well of the resilience of the human spirit.
reply by the author on 08-Oct-2013
Wars are so senseless and none as senseless as the meat grinder that was ww1. To be hit by friendly fire, paralyzed so young. And now against all odds, picking winners- really speaks well of the resilience of the human spirit.
Comment Written 07-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 08-Oct-2013
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Thank you, Ravenblack, for your observations. This particular man spent most of his waking hours studying the form and had an encyclopaedic knowledge which enabled him to amass a small fortune, most of which he donated to the hospital for various projects.
Comment from Spitfire
What an ironic story. Hit by friendly fire after only a day.
His whole future shattered. Love the metaphor of racing. Word choices fill the reader with hope: sunny and comfort.
reply by the author on 08-Oct-2013
What an ironic story. Hit by friendly fire after only a day.
His whole future shattered. Love the metaphor of racing. Word choices fill the reader with hope: sunny and comfort.
Comment Written 07-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 08-Oct-2013
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Thank you, Spitfire, for your kind words. This particular man spent most of his waking hours studying the form and had an encyclopaedic knowledge which enabled him to amass a small fortune, most of which he donated to the hospital for various projects.
Comment from WN BUCHAN
He enlisted at sixteen, trained for a few months and was sent to the trenches.
I have images of the first world war, enlisted, trenches, short training span. There is also the fact that a lot of brave young Australians enlisted to fight the Axis of evil during the second world war. Lovely, sad, but with a message of hope. Another of your thought provoking poems. Nigel.
reply by the author on 08-Oct-2013
He enlisted at sixteen, trained for a few months and was sent to the trenches.
I have images of the first world war, enlisted, trenches, short training span. There is also the fact that a lot of brave young Australians enlisted to fight the Axis of evil during the second world war. Lovely, sad, but with a message of hope. Another of your thought provoking poems. Nigel.
Comment Written 07-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 08-Oct-2013
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Thank you, Nigel, for your summary, observations and kind words. This particular man spent most of his waking hours studying the form and had an encyclopaedic knowledge which enabled him to amass a small fortune, most of which he donated to the hospital for various projects.
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I should have read the footnote before posting the review, it kind of explained what I saw. It really makes you realise how thankful we should be for the little we have.
Health is far more valuable than any weight in gold. Kind regards, Nigel.
Comment from Rondeno
I love the delicious irony of your last line! Yes, many of us still persist in idealising war - medals and nice uniforms - but the truth is, youngsters get hideously maimed, or worse. You convey the tragedy of it all really well.
reply by the author on 08-Oct-2013
I love the delicious irony of your last line! Yes, many of us still persist in idealising war - medals and nice uniforms - but the truth is, youngsters get hideously maimed, or worse. You convey the tragedy of it all really well.
Comment Written 07-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 08-Oct-2013
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Thank you, Rondeno, for your observations and kind words. This particular man spent most of his waking hours studying the form and had an encyclopaedic knowledge which enabled him to amass a small fortune, most of which he donated to the hospital for various projects.
Comment from RGstar
A valid and thoughtful moment in time Tony, It brings about the sadness of time in which there is no respite.
Its seconds are our reality, though sometimes we are powerless in using the seconds in an advantageous way.
We reminisce at the close of play, rather than be content in pursuing life as the opening batsman.
Memories are all we have to look back on, as nothing back there can be grasped, only appreciated and acknowledged for the future.
A kind and thoughtful Gesture Tony.
Thanks for sharing,
Rgstar,
Roy
reply by the author on 08-Oct-2013
A valid and thoughtful moment in time Tony, It brings about the sadness of time in which there is no respite.
Its seconds are our reality, though sometimes we are powerless in using the seconds in an advantageous way.
We reminisce at the close of play, rather than be content in pursuing life as the opening batsman.
Memories are all we have to look back on, as nothing back there can be grasped, only appreciated and acknowledged for the future.
A kind and thoughtful Gesture Tony.
Thanks for sharing,
Rgstar,
Roy
Comment Written 07-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 08-Oct-2013
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Thank you, Roy, for your observations and kind words. This particular man spent most of his waking hours studying the form and had an encyclopaedic knowledge which enabled him to amass a small fortune, most of which he donated to the hospital for various projects.
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Wow, interesting,
Thanks for the insight.
Comment from Dorothy Farrell
This is a really moving poem written in free verse. I like the twist at the end 'against all the odds he had eventually become good at picking a winner' - Interesting author notes. Writing from experience always shines through. Regards Dorothy
reply by the author on 07-Oct-2013
This is a really moving poem written in free verse. I like the twist at the end 'against all the odds he had eventually become good at picking a winner' - Interesting author notes. Writing from experience always shines through. Regards Dorothy
Comment Written 07-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 07-Oct-2013
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Thanks Dorothy. The nurses told me that he was a professional gambler who made a great deal of money, most of which he donated back to the hospital.
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What a great story. To find something he did so well that did not require his limbs only his brain. Dorothy