Liquid Revenge
contest 100 words-prisoner16 total reviews
Comment from CALLAHANMR
Hi Ingrid:)
Great entry and powerful winner. This convists last day gave me vivid imagery. This seems like a perfect picture of someone facing certain death and then ffailing to remember if the act was worth it.
Love and Irish Hugs for a memorable story that will stay with me for a long time.
Roger
reply by the author on 17-Oct-2013
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Hi Ingrid:)
Great entry and powerful winner. This convists last day gave me vivid imagery. This seems like a perfect picture of someone facing certain death and then ffailing to remember if the act was worth it.
Love and Irish Hugs for a memorable story that will stay with me for a long time.
Roger
Comment Written 17-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 17-Oct-2013
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Irish hugs are the best! Keep 'em coming.
Thanks for reading. I'm pretty certain this was a tie with a story Vespros wrote that was very funny about a police dog.
Comment from Gungalo
Congratulations of taking the top position in this contest. It was as graphic as you can get about the last things this man did.
reply by the author on 08-Oct-2013
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Congratulations of taking the top position in this contest. It was as graphic as you can get about the last things this man did.
Comment Written 08-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 08-Oct-2013
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Thank you. I shared the honour with Vapro who wrote a very comic story entitled
'Police Dog.'
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Okay. I'll check it out.
Comment from EMB
Was it worth it? That's a peculiar thing to yell out when you're angry. I'd think something like "I hope it hurts, bastard!" would be a bit more appropriate. Haha!
Nice title for this. :)
reply by the author on 08-Oct-2013
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Was it worth it? That's a peculiar thing to yell out when you're angry. I'd think something like "I hope it hurts, bastard!" would be a bit more appropriate. Haha!
Nice title for this. :)
Comment Written 08-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 08-Oct-2013
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Maybe, but it was the gut question/statement that rolled off my finger tips so maybe there are a few other weirdoes in the world like me..lol
Comment from write hand blue
I can see why this won. With good descriptive detail. Taking you there into that cell with strong visual. All accomplished within the 100 words rule.
:) mel.
reply by the author on 08-Oct-2013
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I can see why this won. With good descriptive detail. Taking you there into that cell with strong visual. All accomplished within the 100 words rule.
:) mel.
Comment Written 08-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 08-Oct-2013
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Thanks very much
Comment from MarjorieAnne
This is a riveting and puzzling story, impelling readers to figure out connections between the title and first and last lines. Emotional pitch is fevered and tense, well-expressed. I would change "angry gods, rumbling" to "angry gods' rumbling and "priest-- they stand" to "priest stand".
reply by the author on 07-Oct-2013
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This is a riveting and puzzling story, impelling readers to figure out connections between the title and first and last lines. Emotional pitch is fevered and tense, well-expressed. I would change "angry gods, rumbling" to "angry gods' rumbling and "priest-- they stand" to "priest stand".
Comment Written 07-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 07-Oct-2013
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Thanks for reading. Your first suggestion about changing god from plural to possessive doesn't work for me as I'm taking the view that the prisoner's god may not be the biblical one. I'll look at the second suggestion again. Thanks.
Comment from Charlene0513
The pain and dubious outcome of one's life is always like a stone wall. "Be Damned" if you try to make a difference or not as your future seems to taunt you until that fatal day.
Charlene
reply by the author on 07-Oct-2013
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The pain and dubious outcome of one's life is always like a stone wall. "Be Damned" if you try to make a difference or not as your future seems to taunt you until that fatal day.
Charlene
Comment Written 07-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 07-Oct-2013
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Yes, and though must of us won't be executed, perhaps a great majority of us 'won't remember' why some things were so important at the time. Thanks for reading.
Comment from Rubylou
Wow, this poem left me with a feeling not easily described. "-nothing left to lose." The numbness . "Revenge sears my veins." Stinging release? I'm not sure how to put in words the impact I feel. Very well written in 100 words. Best to you in the contest. Rubylou
reply by the author on 07-Oct-2013
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Wow, this poem left me with a feeling not easily described. "-nothing left to lose." The numbness . "Revenge sears my veins." Stinging release? I'm not sure how to put in words the impact I feel. Very well written in 100 words. Best to you in the contest. Rubylou
Comment Written 07-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 07-Oct-2013
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Thank you very much, both for the sincere words and the amazing dazzle from all those stars. I appreciate both the review and your feedback.
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You're most welcome.
Comment from Rosalyne
Hi,
This is a great story, tight and well done using only 100 words. You gave a strong account of the last minutes of life before the lethal injection. Great ending. Best of luck in the contest.
Bye
Rosalyne :)
reply by the author on 06-Oct-2013
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Hi,
This is a great story, tight and well done using only 100 words. You gave a strong account of the last minutes of life before the lethal injection. Great ending. Best of luck in the contest.
Bye
Rosalyne :)
Comment Written 06-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 06-Oct-2013
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Thanks very much. flash is always a challenge, but a good one.
Comment from mfowler
It's a tough task, 100 words. I think your effort uses the space effectively. There is good tension built and questions naturally emerge as you read. Your final question is excellent.
An edit: ' lightening ' should be 'lightning' in this case
reply by the author on 06-Oct-2013
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It's a tough task, 100 words. I think your effort uses the space effectively. There is good tension built and questions naturally emerge as you read. Your final question is excellent.
An edit: ' lightening ' should be 'lightning' in this case
Comment Written 06-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 06-Oct-2013
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I've made that mistake before--you'd think I'd learn....Thanks so much for the alert and the read.
Comment from Judy Couch
This story sort of makes the reader feel some of what the prisoner feels. I wanted to sympathize with the prisoner, but resisted it knowing that he was probably getting what he deservd.
reply by the author on 06-Oct-2013
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This story sort of makes the reader feel some of what the prisoner feels. I wanted to sympathize with the prisoner, but resisted it knowing that he was probably getting what he deservd.
Comment Written 06-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 06-Oct-2013
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Thanks, I appreciate the read and review.
