History and Myth
Viewing comments for Chapter 12 "Too Timid to Dance"Poems that tell stories of long ago
15 total reviews
Comment from dmt1967
This is a good poem bad country song though my friend very cat cally for a country song I think but I like the picture it goes with the poem thank you for sharing
reply by the author on 13-Jul-2013
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This is a good poem bad country song though my friend very cat cally for a country song I think but I like the picture it goes with the poem thank you for sharing
Comment Written 13-Jul-2013
reply by the author on 13-Jul-2013
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Thanks dmt. Cat Callyope is what I was shooting for.
Comment from adewpearl
the strong rhymes definitely lack subtlety
I don't think you would have won the contest - you're not nearly "bad" enough, my friend :-) Brooke
reply by the author on 13-Jul-2013
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the strong rhymes definitely lack subtlety
I don't think you would have won the contest - you're not nearly "bad" enough, my friend :-) Brooke
Comment Written 13-Jul-2013
reply by the author on 13-Jul-2013
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Thanks Brooke. I guess it's good that I'm not bad.
Comment from kpsmas123
I think this is the worst country and western song I ever heard/read! You should have won. I think the youuuu was excellent bad. The meter and rhyming scheme is all wonky - nice! I think you should send this to Bob Dylan - he could do it justice.
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reply by the author on 13-Jul-2013
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I think this is the worst country and western song I ever heard/read! You should have won. I think the youuuu was excellent bad. The meter and rhyming scheme is all wonky - nice! I think you should send this to Bob Dylan - he could do it justice.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 13-Jul-2013
reply by the author on 13-Jul-2013
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Thanks kpsmas. I think you right. His voice would fit it perfectly.
Comment from Christof McTarnahan
When I was reading it, I was thinking it would make a great tune. I picked up the acoustic and did a simple G/Em/D7 deal and it sounded awesome. I think if you can put a poem to song, you hit the mark. Great Job.
reply by the author on 13-Jul-2013
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When I was reading it, I was thinking it would make a great tune. I picked up the acoustic and did a simple G/Em/D7 deal and it sounded awesome. I think if you can put a poem to song, you hit the mark. Great Job.
Comment Written 13-Jul-2013
reply by the author on 13-Jul-2013
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Thank you Christof. You're much more talented than I am. If you'd like to use it, let ne know. I really appreciate your comments.
Comment from Alcreator Litt Dear
Simply a poetic catch of glorifying one's beauty and how hard it appears to expose the true or correct stand of graceful stand of beauty is the order of this version well exposed, humbleness well manifested. 1/713
reply by the author on 13-Jul-2013
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Simply a poetic catch of glorifying one's beauty and how hard it appears to expose the true or correct stand of graceful stand of beauty is the order of this version well exposed, humbleness well manifested. 1/713
Comment Written 13-Jul-2013
reply by the author on 13-Jul-2013
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Thank you vrery much Akcreator Litt Dear. I am most pleased with the response.
Comment from CornishChick
Yes, I can relate! It took my hubby 7 years to get me into country music, now I'm hooked.
BTW, I just missed a contest, too. Had it in edit mode and didn't realize it til too late. I still submitted it. It's Vanished.
Keep scribbling! You might just convert me over to poetry!
reply by the author on 12-Jul-2013
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Yes, I can relate! It took my hubby 7 years to get me into country music, now I'm hooked.
BTW, I just missed a contest, too. Had it in edit mode and didn't realize it til too late. I still submitted it. It's Vanished.
Keep scribbling! You might just convert me over to poetry!
Comment Written 12-Jul-2013
reply by the author on 12-Jul-2013
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thanks ashowalter. I don't usually review much non-poetry, but I might majestic an exception in your case.
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Vanished is exactly 100 words. I think you could manage that w/o much pain. btw... my first name is Arlene
Comment from mrsmajor
I enjoyed this country western song, I don't think it could have won the contest..it had a good beat, with good rhyme, and believable words, I liked it!
Thanks for sharing
Hugs,
Victoria..
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2013
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I enjoyed this country western song, I don't think it could have won the contest..it had a good beat, with good rhyme, and believable words, I liked it!
Thanks for sharing
Hugs,
Victoria..
Comment Written 11-Jul-2013
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2013
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Thank you Victoria. Well it was a fun write.
You are most welcome, it was a fun song...I meant to say I do think it could have won the contest..it was fun!
Comment from Maguy Daoud
Lovely, do you know that picture you put it's the oriental dancing, every orient women feel it in her body and toes, and it's so difficult to learn it by the way, unless women has talents. This oriental dance is so sexy and no men wouldn't love to see a women dance to him... Like the old andalus way.
reply by the author on 10-Jul-2013
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Lovely, do you know that picture you put it's the oriental dancing, every orient women feel it in her body and toes, and it's so difficult to learn it by the way, unless women has talents. This oriental dance is so sexy and no men wouldn't love to see a women dance to him... Like the old andalus way.
Comment Written 10-Jul-2013
reply by the author on 10-Jul-2013
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Thank you Maguy. Yes, I know it. It was the only one with a woman who looked like she was gesturing to come and dance that I could find.
Comment from Preston McWhorter
Good morning, Treischel,
Excellent cadence caused by the fantastic rhyming I suppose.
You missed the mark of being the worst also of being the best. But you succeeded in producing verse that is totally enjoyable. The song set to the correct tune could appear on Country/Westerns top ten.
reply by the author on 09-Jul-2013
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Good morning, Treischel,
Excellent cadence caused by the fantastic rhyming I suppose.
You missed the mark of being the worst also of being the best. But you succeeded in producing verse that is totally enjoyable. The song set to the correct tune could appear on Country/Westerns top ten.
Comment Written 09-Jul-2013
reply by the author on 09-Jul-2013
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Thanks Preston. I appreciate the compliment.
Comment from Dean Kuch
Ha! What a Hoot 'n' a Holler, Mr. T! This was funny, but, are you absolutely positive it's all that bad? I mean, seriously my friend, I have heard a heel of a lot worse coming from the country & western community lately...Just sayin'.
I wish you'd have made the contest, my friend. This one woulda' been a hit!
reply by the author on 09-Jul-2013
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Ha! What a Hoot 'n' a Holler, Mr. T! This was funny, but, are you absolutely positive it's all that bad? I mean, seriously my friend, I have heard a heel of a lot worse coming from the country & western community lately...Just sayin'.
I wish you'd have made the contest, my friend. This one woulda' been a hit!
Comment Written 09-Jul-2013
reply by the author on 09-Jul-2013
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Thanks Dean. It was fun to write. I voted in the contest booth. There were several really good bad ones, I had a laugh.
