Little Poems
Viewing comments for Chapter 50 "Lust or Love"Small and Specialty Poems
10 total reviews
Comment from L. Sherman
I haven't felt brave enough to try this style yet but I have to say you pull it off very well. Though, at least to my reading, the final line seems to contain 6 syllables?
Either way, you succeed in bringing forth a cohesive message, which isn't the easiest thing to accomplish with this form :)
reply by the author on 15-Jun-2013
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I haven't felt brave enough to try this style yet but I have to say you pull it off very well. Though, at least to my reading, the final line seems to contain 6 syllables?
Either way, you succeed in bringing forth a cohesive message, which isn't the easiest thing to accomplish with this form :)
Comment Written 15-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 15-Jun-2013
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Hmm you are right. Dang.
Comment from ravenblack
definitely not a fan of this form as total alliteration seems to serve little purpose in a short form other than to leave the poem muddled - but unlike others I have read, you do not let alliteration dictate the entire poem over sense/meaning. good job. still, though, a silly form ( my opinion)
reply by the author on 14-Jun-2013
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definitely not a fan of this form as total alliteration seems to serve little purpose in a short form other than to leave the poem muddled - but unlike others I have read, you do not let alliteration dictate the entire poem over sense/meaning. good job. still, though, a silly form ( my opinion)
Comment Written 14-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 14-Jun-2013
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I tried to make it more difficult by holding the alliteration in all lines and making it a tongue twister, but I tend to agree with you that it is a somewhat silly format. On the other hand, I like to vary my style, and it makes an entertaining exercise. It certainly should not become a staple, but is another tool in the Muse's tool box. I like diversity.
Comment from robina1978
Excellent artwork to complement your poem. I loved you used this new form that DRG invented. Nice how you stuck to all the same letters in all your lines as you didn't have to.
reply by the author on 14-Jun-2013
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Excellent artwork to complement your poem. I loved you used this new form that DRG invented. Nice how you stuck to all the same letters in all your lines as you didn't have to.
Comment Written 14-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 14-Jun-2013
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Thanks Ine. Thought I'd stretch the concept a bit. Makesva tongue twister 5A.
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no I would not consider this a tongue twister at all and welcome, Ine
Comment from Selina Stambi
Oh, Tom .... you must have had so much fun with this one ... alliteration heaven!
Very clever and a powerful message. :)
la la la la la ..... ooh la la :)
reply by the author on 13-Jun-2013
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Oh, Tom .... you must have had so much fun with this one ... alliteration heaven!
Very clever and a powerful message. :)
la la la la la ..... ooh la la :)
Comment Written 13-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 13-Jun-2013
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Thank you Sonali. It was lots of fun.
Comment from sunnilicious
Love and lust should go together. Then all couples would find their happily ever after. Enjoyable tongue twister with all those L words. Nicely done. Great!
reply by the author on 13-Jun-2013
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Love and lust should go together. Then all couples would find their happily ever after. Enjoyable tongue twister with all those L words. Nicely done. Great!
Comment Written 13-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 13-Jun-2013
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Thank you Sunni, I found it hard to read orally too.
Comment from Capricorn30
A well-penned poem on the lessons of love;
Imperative advice we need to heed, strong words of wisdom.
I need to attempt the "5A" format--thank you for introducing me to this form of poetry.
reply by the author on 13-Jun-2013
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A well-penned poem on the lessons of love;
Imperative advice we need to heed, strong words of wisdom.
I need to attempt the "5A" format--thank you for introducing me to this form of poetry.
Comment Written 13-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 13-Jun-2013
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Thank you Capricorn. Give it a try. Note that not every line has to be the same letter, you can have line one alliterating the letter S, line two, the letter B, and line three the letter B, if you want. Just all words in the poem must be an alliteration. Give one a try.
Comment from DRG24
Nice Job!!!! IDK if we have met but im DRG24 and I created the 5A. Let me just tell you, you did an awesome job! Message me if you write another :)
reply by the author on 13-Jun-2013
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Nice Job!!!! IDK if we have met but im DRG24 and I created the 5A. Let me just tell you, you did an awesome job! Message me if you write another :)
Comment Written 13-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 13-Jun-2013
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Thank you DRG. Glad to meet you and that you stopped by for a read. I am very excited to get a six from the creator. I'll swing by and lookout yours.
Comment from 9999pool
Just loved the "L" alliteration and the words are weaved so intricately. Love an lust - how much difference can we find in them. Loathing loss is the lesson learnt.
Simply outstanding write. Out of sixers - so a virtual ****** for this excellent write and well done! Bravo!
Have a great day writing.
Cheerio, Ritchie
reply by the author on 13-Jun-2013
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Just loved the "L" alliteration and the words are weaved so intricately. Love an lust - how much difference can we find in them. Loathing loss is the lesson learnt.
Simply outstanding write. Out of sixers - so a virtual ****** for this excellent write and well done! Bravo!
Have a great day writing.
Cheerio, Ritchie
Comment Written 13-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 13-Jun-2013
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Thanks Ritchie.. Virtual sixes are accepted here.
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Hi Tom,
Thanks for the hoot. If only pebbles can be exchange and accept as member dollars here, that will be good, smiles.
Cheerio, Ritchie.
Comment from Evelyn Fort Stewart
Well, this is an interesting new style for sure. I never count syllables but it appears that you have it down pat. Good Job. God loves you and so do I.
reply by the author on 13-Jun-2013
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Well, this is an interesting new style for sure. I never count syllables but it appears that you have it down pat. Good Job. God loves you and so do I.
Comment Written 13-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 13-Jun-2013
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Thank you Evelyn.
Comment from Kasha1985
Thanks for teaching me a new form! Also, your poem is really good and so true! You followed the rules and had such great meaning in such a small piece. Good job!
reply by the author on 13-Jun-2013
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Thanks for teaching me a new form! Also, your poem is really good and so true! You followed the rules and had such great meaning in such a small piece. Good job!
Comment Written 13-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 13-Jun-2013
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Thank you Kasha. I appreciate your visit and comments.
