Reviews from

My Story (Edited)

I can still taste the metal of the .357 in my mouth...

54 total reviews 
Comment from Phyllis Stewart
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

jack hammer it's way from beneath << You mean ITS, not IT'S here. Remember this:

IT'S = IT IS
ITS = belonging to IT

THat out of the way, let me say I think this will win the contest, or at least a second or third prize. Excellent in every way! Thank you for sharing this inspiring story.

 Comment Written 12-Jun-2013


reply by the author on 13-Jun-2013
    Thank you so much for the wonderful comment, Phyllis. I wrote this story for a testimonial at my church a few years ago. After I recited it in church, my pastor took me aside, Pastor Ritchey Pride, (look him up on Facebook; he is an amazing man of God), and he begged me not to let those words die. "Get this message out there, Dean. This needs to be heard..." And so, I took the (very scary) plunge and posted it publically for the first time here, on FanStory. I entered it in the contest not in the hopes of winning. But, I felt such a contest could possibly allow it better exposure, get my message out there to those who may be hurting, "Hey, hang in there. Life WILL get better..."
    This is my hope, my ultimate goal. If it should win, then that is just God's way of saying, "Hey, Deano...see? I told you, my son." If not, and it has touched someone deeply, just one, lost and lonely person? Then it has accomplished it's purpose seven fold.
    Thanks so much again for your wonderful review, Phyllis. I sincerely appreciate it!
Comment from alexgeorge
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Thank you for sharing this with me, Dean. I'm stunned that your reached that point where you were ready to take your own life. Your father saved you that day. And God spoke to you, explained that life has hardships, but that he would also throw pleasant things your way to far outway the bad. I'm glad to have you alive and putting 'ink' to 'paper' so we may share your world, both fantastic and real. And I'm also glad you have found your way in life and are content with how it now goes, now that you are blessed with love and the gift of your daughter.

 Comment Written 12-Jun-2013


reply by the author on 12-Jun-2013
    Thank you very much for that, alexgeorge. That really meant a lot to me. I will never take your readership and continued support for granted. Whether it be poetry, or prose; fiction, or non-fiction, I will always strive to give you 100% of my best efforts.
    Thanks so much again for such a wonderful review.
reply by alexgeorge on 12-Jun-2013
    You're welcome,

    Alex.
Comment from Spitfire
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Definitely, an ephiphany. And no coincidence that your dad ordered you to mow the lawn that day. Guardian angel or spirit guide, Dad received a special message that day too.
A fascinating write with its symbolism. And I'm so glad that things turned out well for you. Best of luck in the contest, Dean

 Comment Written 11-Jun-2013


reply by the author on 12-Jun-2013
    Thanks so very much again, Spitfire. I sincerely appreciate your wonderful review.
Comment from Gungalo
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

What a wonderful story Dean and that gunshot is enough to scare the living daylights outta me. LOL It's something to plot and plan a race between you and God.

 Comment Written 11-Jun-2013


reply by the author on 12-Jun-2013
    Ha ha, sorry I scared ya', Gungalo, and you're absolutely right, it isn't wise to race against God. He's the one always carrying the starter's pistol...
reply by Gungalo on 12-Jun-2013
    Yeah Dean. And I was scared. LOL.
Comment from Evelyn Fort Stewart
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

This needs a 10 by all means. It made me cry. God is so awesome. There were several times I contemplated suicide during the 32 years of abuse but God always intervened and walked me through that crisis. Yes, you can hear His voice audibly. I have. I wouldn't be here today without His mercy and guidance. They publish a Christian Writer's Guide that lists all of the Christian magazines that are looking for inspirational pieces. I really think this is a story that 700 Club would be interested in. They often do mini-stories. Awesome piece. God loves you and I do too. Good luck in the contest.

 Comment Written 11-Jun-2013


reply by the author on 12-Jun-2013
    Thank you so much, again, Evelyn. I can not express in simple word, strung together to make simple sentences, how much I value this review. It made my month!
Comment from cheyennewy
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Hi Dean,

You have written a wonderful story about depression, hopelessness and the determination to take your life. God spoke to me too so I don't doubt what you have written her one bit. You have excellent writing skills and I was engaged in this story from the first line to the last. To come back from that dark place and live a wonderful life is admirable. The picture at the end is beautiful and I couldn't stop looking at it. Well done and good luck in the contest. You get my last six!...blessings, chey

 Comment Written 11-Jun-2013


reply by the author on 12-Jun-2013
    Thank you very much for such a stellar rating, cheyennewy. I appreciate it, more than you know...
reply by cheyennewy on 12-Jun-2013
    You are so welcome...chey
Comment from JM daSilva
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

And let me tell you something, Dean. It is not just about what you would have lost, but what I would have lost. I would have lost meeting such a great guy as you are. Thank that god of yours for not letting you do it. And thank your father who interrupted you at the right moment. Free will versus determinism. A little leaf flies into the air, hits your daddy in the face, he looks at the lawn, goes back home, knocks on the door. Very nice, huh? Thank your god for keeping you alive so I could meet you. Very selfish of me, huh?
I owe you a six, I didn't have one here.

 Comment Written 11-Jun-2013


reply by the author on 11-Jun-2013
    And I you, my friend. And I you...
Comment from Selina Stambi
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Wow! Wow! Wow!! ..... THANK YOU!! I have felt nudged to write my own story ... which is SO similar ... and haven't dared to. I certainly feel encouraged to do so, after this one.

A long read, but it didn't seem to matter.

Bless you, my friend. John 3:16 - voice? yep, been there, heard that! Priceless - and on Fanstory ... hot on the heals of your horror stuff ?? :) :) :)


Spags:

parents' home (move position of the apostrophe)

responsible for, as well as expected to ...( comma, not a semi-colon)

threshold - one word (not two)

its .. watch out for those misplaced apostrophes

children's toys (missed the apostrophe)

what-nots (instead of wot-nots ... not entirely sure, though)

 Comment Written 11-Jun-2013


reply by the author on 12-Jun-2013
    Thank you very much, Reach, for the wonderful, insightful review, as well as pointing out those darn mistakes for which I'm notorious for. I really appreciate it!
Comment from N.K. Wagner
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

You did a good job relating your story, Dean. There's no question that you were touched by the spirit we call God and that your life changed as you drew strength from that spirit. I know multi-media is a trend here, but your excellent words need nothing to increase their impact. :) Nancy

 Comment Written 11-Jun-2013


reply by the author on 12-Jun-2013
    Thanks so much, Nancy. I sincerely enjoy having you pop-in from time to time, giving me your insights and comments. Your support is always appreciated.
Comment from KYPollard/El Gato
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Isn't it amazing how when we think this world is done with us, God shows us how we are needed? I enjoyed reading your testimony, my friend. Good luck in the contest.

 Comment Written 11-Jun-2013


reply by the author on 12-Jun-2013
    Thanks KY Pollard/El Gato, and yes, it certainly is. Before that day in my father's garage, I could barely write a legible recipe, much less pen a story or a piece of poetry. But, as I've said in my testimonial (for that's truly what is is), He changed me that day.

    I very much appreciate you investing your time and efforts in reviewing this. As always, I extend to you a heat-felt and sincere, "Thank you"...