Reviews from

Cold Dead Hands

One girl's personal struggle to survive nuclear winter.

63 total reviews 
Comment from poetwatch
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Man, I thought I had an active imagination. Yet, with the weather as it is maybe there is some truth behind your story--Skip the zombie part--Korean with all its testing may have tilted the earth to the right or left. I know that earthquakes can be triggered by explosions in the earth. Hope nothing of this happens cause to tell you the truth I like my meat fried.

 Comment Written 16-Jan-2018


reply by the author on 16-Jan-2018
    Thanks so much for taking the time to read and review this, poetwatch.
    I appreciate your comments and I'm glad you enjoyed it.
    Take care,
    ~Dean
Comment from Gypsy Blue Rose
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Paragraph starting with the words silence for the most part, except...... there are occaional (occasional)

As normal as an old lady's flowered butt....LoL

What is WVU?

I was surprised to find out that it was a girl not a boy who was narrating the story.

The entire began to shake.......drug him into....(drugged him)

The sky had turned black like an ebony novelist....I love hoe you described the sky.

I like the way you prescribed in such detailed way how the zombie apocalypse started. I watched a lot of zombie movies and I never heard it described that way. Sure, I have seen how it stated but not described in words like this.

Sirens howling like wounded banshees would scare the scrap out of me. I hate those things.

These creatures are as much as being human as vegetarian is a cannibal.......LoL



Title after that sentence....September 6, 2016 Tusesday. (Tuesday)

Spetimber 8, 2066 tuhrsday (September 8, 2066 Thursday)

Setptabmer nineth 2166 Frdys.......now I get it! These are not spelling errors, they are intentional to show the state the girl is in. She is starving and having a hard time focusing.

Wiped ads with newspaper? Yes I'm ashamed to admit that but when I was a little girl I did do it. I don't know why we only had that sometimes. Probably no money for toilet paper. I can't blame my parents for that. When I was a very young mother going to college to get skills for a on, I run out of food and toilet paper plenty of times, one of my kind teachers bought us a bag of groceries more than once. I stole toilet paper from the college's bathrooms more than once too.


EXCELLENT JOB!!! I could have read this novella if it was a book with pleasure. I love zombies apocalypse movies they are my favorite, with the exemption of anything Stephen King writes, or Harold Dean Cook II.

Why don't you write more stories like this? Maybe you do but you don't post them on fanstory. If you do, could you let me know how I can get them?

Wonderful and professional work, Dean. I'm glad I found it. *Gypsy hugs*

 Comment Written 20-Mar-2016


reply by the author on 21-Mar-2016
    Thanks for diggin' this up from out of the FanStory graveyard and reading it, Gypsy. I know it's pretty long, and I hope it held your interests.
    WVU is the abbreviation for West Virginia University. One of the schools my female protagonist was contemplating attending.

    I'm also glad you got the misspelling of the dates and why it was done this way. I can't tell you how many times people pointed them out as grammatical mistakes, LOL. It was rather funny.

    I fixed the spelling of "occasional', and "drug". Thank you for catching that. That simply shows that you were paying attention to what you were reading, and I appreciate THAT even more.

    All in all, I just wanna say thanks a million for such a fantastic review!

    HUGS!!!
    ~Dean ;)
reply by Gypsy Blue Rose on 21-Mar-2016
    Dean, as I said in my review, zombie and apocalypse horror movies are my favorite. It was my pleasure to read it and I would like to read more like that one if you have it somewhere hidden in your dusty old and creepy attic. I FREAKING LOVED IT!!! Okay? And I am not saying this just to get on your good side so that you will remember me when you become a successful and very rich horror author. Dean, remember the little people. Okay? I am working on a haiku book illustrated by my own paintings, I wouldn't mind if you help me publish my book when you are rich and famous. LOL

    *gypsy hugs*
Comment from Day Z Chayn
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

I loved how this didn't turn out to be cliche as in, "Darling, let's kill those zombie bastards before they kill us." In this "nuclear winter" scenario, it seems apparent that most humanitarians ought still get ahead, even when "getting ahead" is only done by cannibals. Reminiscent of Richard Matheson's "book to big screen efforts, but with less drama.

There's a quiet dignity apparent in this piece not often realized with contemporary horror available in current formats. Glad it didn't turn out to be like a wide screen cinematic comic book experience for me.

Reminiscent of "Flowers For Algernon" by Daniel Keyes. That was the first thing which struck me about the uniqueness of this entire piece.

I've written about nuclear winter, but compared to this, I thought of the entire concept as a "cheap-assed carnival ride" where just before the roller coaster stops, all you do is puke on the seat you're sitting in when you reach the end of the ride.

Blessings,
Shane

 Comment Written 10-Jul-2015


reply by the author on 11-Jul-2015
    Thank you, Shane, and you're absolutely correct. I worked very hard on this story to keep from falling into that old cliched comic book-like doomsday scenario. I wanted this to have a more claustrophobic, in-you-face, up close and personal feel. I'm very happy you felt that I was able to pull it off.
    Thanks for the excellent and detailed analysis, and for your six star rating as well. As always, all are sincerely appreciated.
    ~Dean
Comment from AndrewMcfarlane
Good
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Good Pacing and kept me reading to the end. A difficult story to find an end to...I think because you are writing in the past tense you take some of the punch out of the climax of killing the father. IF she is recording it, perhaps someone can find the recording and hear the fight between them...for a more immediate feeling while keeping to the past tense and hearing her final moments.

Otherwise,great story


 Comment Written 06-Jan-2014


reply by the author on 07-Jan-2014
    Thanks, Andrew. I truly appreciate your input.
Comment from jgirlie152
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

This has been a fascinating story, and I realize you put a lot of effort from your imagination into this writing. Parts of it (intentionally) are quite disgusting, but I realize this was done purposely to make the story factual. The subject is one some people certainly worry about, but on a week full of 90 degree weather in the north here, it's almost cooling to read thissub-zero horror story. Very excellent work you have done on this.
Brrrrrr, Joan

 Comment Written 16-Jul-2013


reply by the author on 16-Jul-2013
    Thanks so much for taking the time to review it for me, jgirlie 152. I do appreciate it!
Comment from Tomes Johnston
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

This is absolutely fantastic. I bow in front of the master. I entered this competition as well, but my entry was miserable in comparison to this. You are indeed the master of horror. I was completely engrossed with this. This is a well-deserved victory. Well done.

 Comment Written 16-Jul-2013


reply by the author on 16-Jul-2013
    Thank you very much, Tomes, I really appreciate that! I tried to read everyone's entry that I ran across, but there is no way, at least that I know of, to see who all is entered into the contest. I will have to look up your story and give it a look-see!

    Thanks so much again!
reply by Tomes Johnston on 16-Jul-2013
    Thank you, but it is nothing compared to yours. well done, and take care.

    Tom.
Comment from Contests

Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

A contest winning entry! A seven star rating from the Contest Committee for posting the winning contest entry.

 Comment Written 16-Jul-2013


reply by the author on 16-Jul-2013
    My very gracious thanks to Tom and all of the committee members. This is quite an honor! I read and reviewed all of the entries entered in this contest, and there were some amazing stories written.
    Thanks so much again...
Comment from BunnyS
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Okay, so I won't be sleeping for a week! I was so scared to read parts of the story that I skimmed over a lot, then had to go back and read it again because it made no sense without reading the entire paragraph!

There were a couple of things I thought you should take a look at:
but the line was (as) dead
Several old oaks in the yard have become shredded twigs, skeletal remains of the majestic topiary they once were(.)
There are (occaional) screams outside

Okay, now, for the story. You hit your mark in the thriller department. The story has a lot of substance and is definitely very scary. It has a lot of twists and turns but you stay on task throughout; not easy to do with this kind of story! I know I'm a wimp, so saying it scared the bejeezes out of me isn't really saying much, but it did... scare the bejeezes out of me. The picture was also awesome, creepy, but awesome!

Great job, Dean! I wish you a lot of luck in the contest! Now I'm going to try to get some sleep... good thing my hubbie likes to cuddle... and doesn't mind sleeping with a light on! :)

Bunny

 Comment Written 14-Jul-2013


reply by the author on 14-Jul-2013
    Heh heh...thanks Bunny S. The mere fact that it horrified you, no matter how much of a 'wimp' you say that you are, nonetheless makes me extremely happy, because I did my job! And if you happen to have a dream tonight, as you lay warm and cozy in your bed, about a horde of screaming, ravenous creatures threatening to break into your front door and consume you? No thanks is necessary, you're very welcome, lol...
reply by BunnyS on 14-Jul-2013
    Well, thank you very much! I didn't have any such dreams last night, I was too tired! We just returned from our son's house and after a 12 hour drive, I don't even remember going to bed! But there's always tonight; thank you very much! You gave me the willies! lol

    You know, I really should have stuck with what I know for this particular contest. I have been giving my kids sleepless nights for years with campfire ghost stories. I've never written any of them down. Sometimes I even scare myself! Maybe next time...
Comment from GaryCecil
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

This was a very solid read. The idea of a journal/audio log was implemented well. Also, the eerie fact that daddy was in the bathroom still needing to be taken care of. I do like how you killed him. It is a short story and has a complete thought so it is hard to critique this in a negative manner. You have the start of something really solid here!

 Comment Written 07-Jul-2013


reply by the author on 09-Jul-2013
    Thanks, GaryPC, I appreciate that. Was the warning at the top helpful in alerting you that there would be sound accompanying this as you read it? I added that for those that enjoy the sound FX, and hoped it would help.
    Thanks so much, again!
reply by GaryCecil on 09-Jul-2013
    Yes, good placement for that. For me personally I didn't try it. I like complete silence when I read or write so I can dig deep into the author's or my own thoughts. Noise is great in film though! Easily the hardest part about writing horror is that we do not have sound. Every horror movie succeeds with great sound.
Comment from RedMarie33
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Wow, excellent story, totally sucked me in and kept my attention to the very end. Great writing, very realistic 1st person perspective. Good job. (-:

 Comment Written 06-Jul-2013


reply by the author on 06-Jul-2013
    Thank you very much RedMarie33, I am very happy that you liked it. Thanks for reading and reviewing it for me, I really appreciate it!