Little Poems
Viewing comments for Chapter 15 "ode haiku (eagle thoughts)"Small and Specialty Poems
17 total reviews
Comment from charlyann
Great job on a 5-75- format..strong bold message...I love eagles...they're majestic...great pic on this good job and good luck
reply by the author on 30-Jan-2013
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Great job on a 5-75- format..strong bold message...I love eagles...they're majestic...great pic on this good job and good luck
Comment Written 29-Jan-2013
reply by the author on 30-Jan-2013
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Thank you charlyann.
Comment from Righteous Riter
From the photo to the message, this piece has everything working. The message is clear. It is short, sweet and the point. This piece also meets the criteria of a 5-7-5. Good job.
reply by the author on 30-Jan-2013
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From the photo to the message, this piece has everything working. The message is clear. It is short, sweet and the point. This piece also meets the criteria of a 5-7-5. Good job.
Comment Written 29-Jan-2013
reply by the author on 30-Jan-2013
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Thank you Righteous Riter.
Comment from Gungalo
to be an eagle
free to soar the mountain heights
rabbit's dying wish
Oh congratulations on winning this contest with this write Treischel. It was good and I imagaine the rabbit would thing that if at all possible.
reply by the author on 30-Jan-2013
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to be an eagle
free to soar the mountain heights
rabbit's dying wish
Oh congratulations on winning this contest with this write Treischel. It was good and I imagaine the rabbit would thing that if at all possible.
Comment Written 29-Jan-2013
reply by the author on 30-Jan-2013
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Thank you. Finally got a haiku right.
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LOL.
Comment from Val Crisson
Very, very, nice haiku and the satori line is one of the best I've read on this site. I like that the poet does not sugar coat nature, and captures a true moment in time.
reply by the author on 28-Jan-2013
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Very, very, nice haiku and the satori line is one of the best I've read on this site. I like that the poet does not sugar coat nature, and captures a true moment in time.
Comment Written 28-Jan-2013
reply by the author on 28-Jan-2013
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Thank you Val.
Comment from PoeticXscape
A great poem until the end which confused me. A rabbit's dying wish? what is? to see a eagle flying over a mountain or to be killed by an eagle? there is the 5 stars you asked for.
reply by the author on 28-Jan-2013
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A great poem until the end which confused me. A rabbit's dying wish? what is? to see a eagle flying over a mountain or to be killed by an eagle? there is the 5 stars you asked for.
Comment Written 28-Jan-2013
reply by the author on 28-Jan-2013
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To be the Eagle is the wish.
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ah I see
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The last line is a satori. It's meant to be a twist that takes you in another direction than the first two lines take you. That is the property of a Haiku. Still a 4 on my contest winner?
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sorry didn't know i can change it beg your pardon
Comment from yonashalom
I see why this is a winner. Congratulations! Things sometimes go over my head and I had to read the last line a couple times to relate it to the previous. What an awesome play on words. The rabbit will die getting his wish to soar the mountains... chauffeured by his natural predator. Very clever! Well done. ~Yona
reply by the author on 26-Jan-2013
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I see why this is a winner. Congratulations! Things sometimes go over my head and I had to read the last line a couple times to relate it to the previous. What an awesome play on words. The rabbit will die getting his wish to soar the mountains... chauffeured by his natural predator. Very clever! Well done. ~Yona
Comment Written 26-Jan-2013
reply by the author on 26-Jan-2013
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Thank you Yona. I appreciate your visit and kind words. I see we each only have one vote in the Winter contest. You certainly deserve to win it.
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Thanks for your kindness. :)~Yona
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
I don't know how I missed this one, it is really good. And a worthy winner. I love the illustration of the eagle, goes really well with your Haiku. Congratulations!! xsx Sandra
reply by the author on 25-Jan-2013
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I don't know how I missed this one, it is really good. And a worthy winner. I love the illustration of the eagle, goes really well with your Haiku. Congratulations!! xsx Sandra
Comment Written 25-Jan-2013
reply by the author on 25-Jan-2013
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Thank you Sandra.
Comment from Joannforsberg
Congratulations on this contest win. Like the top of the food chain thought. Then a rabbit dying wish. Great imagery with that. Of course your photograph is beautiful also. You have moved up fast as you are at #54 in accomplished poet. So that is excellent. Blessings, JO
reply by the author on 25-Jan-2013
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Congratulations on this contest win. Like the top of the food chain thought. Then a rabbit dying wish. Great imagery with that. Of course your photograph is beautiful also. You have moved up fast as you are at #54 in accomplished poet. So that is excellent. Blessings, JO
Comment Written 25-Jan-2013
reply by the author on 25-Jan-2013
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Thank you Jo. Yes, it is amazing. I started in November as #1067. This is about the number 30 contest I've entered, so after spending all those $5 entries, and getting frustrated time after time. It feels good to finally win one.
Comment from adewpearl
excellent pairing of photo and poem, which is in good 5/7/5 form
you convey a wish that so many people have, to have the gift of flight and the freedom that would give
and then your final line makes this wish so poignant
Congratulations on your contest win :-)
Brooke
reply by the author on 25-Jan-2013
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excellent pairing of photo and poem, which is in good 5/7/5 form
you convey a wish that so many people have, to have the gift of flight and the freedom that would give
and then your final line makes this wish so poignant
Congratulations on your contest win :-)
Brooke
Comment Written 25-Jan-2013
reply by the author on 25-Jan-2013
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Thank you Brooke. I finally won one! I so happy!
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Winning is fun, isn't it? :-)
Comment from kiwisteveh
Congratulations on your win - justified judging by the snort of amusement I gave out when I read your last line! Of course, it is appreciated more because the first two lines lead the reader to expect that this will be conveying a stereotypical image.
Steve
reply by the author on 25-Jan-2013
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Congratulations on your win - justified judging by the snort of amusement I gave out when I read your last line! Of course, it is appreciated more because the first two lines lead the reader to expect that this will be conveying a stereotypical image.
Steve
Comment Written 25-Jan-2013
reply by the author on 25-Jan-2013
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Thanks Steve. Glad you had a snort. That was the effect I was looking for.
