Leon's Lost Loot
A short fable27 total reviews
Comment from Darla9
This is a very fun tale for children. I loved your description of a car! Very funny. Good job with the prompt, and I liked the moral as well :)
reply by the author on 06-May-2012
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This is a very fun tale for children. I loved your description of a car! Very funny. Good job with the prompt, and I liked the moral as well :)
Comment Written 06-May-2012
reply by the author on 06-May-2012
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I'm glad you liked my little leprechaun story. Thanks for the wonderful review.
Comment from mommerry
You have a sweet story with a solid moral. My only concern was that the "smelly animal" was never identified - a balloon for a parade - a toy of some sort?? I found no concerns with SPAG.
reply by the author on 06-May-2012
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You have a sweet story with a solid moral. My only concern was that the "smelly animal" was never identified - a balloon for a parade - a toy of some sort?? I found no concerns with SPAG.
Comment Written 06-May-2012
reply by the author on 06-May-2012
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The " smelly animal" was a car. Thanks for reading my story and for the great review.
Comment from Val Crisson
What a fate to be turned into a human! Really enjoyed this fable, though it took me a minute to figure out the round leg part. I like that the author employs the sense of smell into this poem - itvgave more richness
reply by the author on 06-May-2012
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What a fate to be turned into a human! Really enjoyed this fable, though it took me a minute to figure out the round leg part. I like that the author employs the sense of smell into this poem - itvgave more richness
Comment Written 06-May-2012
reply by the author on 06-May-2012
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Leprechauns don't want to be turned into humans! When it's for kids it can't be too scary. Thanks for the great review, glad you enjoyed it.
Comment from Carole Rosa
Cindy, Your children's story is vivid and shows much imagination. In my opinion, your moral to the story was fantastic. Very nice. Carole
reply by the author on 06-May-2012
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Cindy, Your children's story is vivid and shows much imagination. In my opinion, your moral to the story was fantastic. Very nice. Carole
Comment Written 06-May-2012
reply by the author on 06-May-2012
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I'm so glad you liked my little leprechaun story. Thanks for reading and for the great review.
Comment from juliaSjames
I loved the story. The "smelly animal with round legs" is a terrific description of a car. The write flowed well and was enlivened by Leon's voiced thoughts.
Alas! The moral of the fable fell flat.(sic). It's wise advice and appropriate to the tale. But it lacked punch.
reply by the author on 06-May-2012
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I loved the story. The "smelly animal with round legs" is a terrific description of a car. The write flowed well and was enlivened by Leon's voiced thoughts.
Alas! The moral of the fable fell flat.(sic). It's wise advice and appropriate to the tale. But it lacked punch.
Comment Written 05-May-2012
reply by the author on 06-May-2012
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I wanted to add a little more but I ran out of words (300 max) and I had to wrap it up. Glad you enjoyed it otherwise. Thanks for reviewing.
Comment from Carolyn Hilliard
An excellent moral; a good story to go along with it. It showed that laziness and careleness whould have caught him what he valued. We all need this reminder at times.
reply by the author on 05-May-2012
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An excellent moral; a good story to go along with it. It showed that laziness and careleness whould have caught him what he valued. We all need this reminder at times.
Comment Written 05-May-2012
reply by the author on 05-May-2012
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Thanks for the six stars! I'm so glad you liked my little leprechaun story. Cindy
Comment from burneymac29
Awesome fable. I loved the way you described the car as a huge beast that the leprechaun had to defeat in order to get his gold back. Very engaging and entertaining.. Good job
reply by the author on 05-May-2012
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Awesome fable. I loved the way you described the car as a huge beast that the leprechaun had to defeat in order to get his gold back. Very engaging and entertaining.. Good job
Comment Written 05-May-2012
reply by the author on 05-May-2012
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Thanks for reading and reviewing my little story. I'm do glad you liked it.
Comment from PJJuarez
The moral of your story was well shown in here. I liked the picture that went with it, it seems a lot of the leprechauns value their gold. I think we all can somehow relate to the worryness of our valued things getting stolen or going missing.
reply by the author on 05-May-2012
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The moral of your story was well shown in here. I liked the picture that went with it, it seems a lot of the leprechauns value their gold. I think we all can somehow relate to the worryness of our valued things getting stolen or going missing.
Comment Written 05-May-2012
reply by the author on 05-May-2012
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Thanks for reading and reviewing my little story. I'm do glad you liked it.
Comment from tinams
This is a very clever piece of writing and a very worthy entry to the 'Write a Modern Fable' Competition. I wish you good luck :) Tins
reply by the author on 05-May-2012
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This is a very clever piece of writing and a very worthy entry to the 'Write a Modern Fable' Competition. I wish you good luck :) Tins
Comment Written 05-May-2012
reply by the author on 05-May-2012
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Thanks for reading and reviewing my little story and the 5 stars. I'm do glad you enjoyed it.
Comment from Desert Desperado
A fantastic story that kept leading me down the path to the end like a good fable should. Then, pow, the moral of the story wrapped up all the loose ends and made sense of everything. Great story.
reply by the author on 05-May-2012
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A fantastic story that kept leading me down the path to the end like a good fable should. Then, pow, the moral of the story wrapped up all the loose ends and made sense of everything. Great story.
Comment Written 04-May-2012
reply by the author on 05-May-2012
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I'm so glad you liked my little leprechaun story. Thanks for the 5 stars.
