Day Closes Up Her Shop
quatrains in 8/7/8/7209 total reviews
Comment from catch22
This is a lovely set of quatrains that flows so well when read aloud, and the rhyming was excellent too (love the rhyme pairing of burning/returning). For me, the sun imagery evokes feelings of hope that night will eventually end and the dawn will come refreshed. I really enjoyed reading this eloquent write.
reply by the author on 05-Apr-2012
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This is a lovely set of quatrains that flows so well when read aloud, and the rhyming was excellent too (love the rhyme pairing of burning/returning). For me, the sun imagery evokes feelings of hope that night will eventually end and the dawn will come refreshed. I really enjoyed reading this eloquent write.
Comment Written 04-Apr-2012
reply by the author on 05-Apr-2012
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Gail, thanks so very much for your thoughtful review :-) Brooke
Comment from missy98writer
Brooke
Your fantasticly written verse has superb use of personification, excellrent rhyme and meter. You also used very fine alliteration and great metaphor usage. The art work is stunningly beautiful you used. Your imagery is exquisite. I enjoyed your first stanza the best:
"Day closes up her shop each night
to take her inventory,
but Sun won't waste upon some shelf
before a blaze of glory. "
Your writing rocks, my friend. I'd recommend your awesomely penned poem to other reviewers. It was a pleasure to have read your poem. I hope you have a lovely day. Enjoy the deserved six.
Melissa.
reply by the author on 05-Apr-2012
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Brooke
Your fantasticly written verse has superb use of personification, excellrent rhyme and meter. You also used very fine alliteration and great metaphor usage. The art work is stunningly beautiful you used. Your imagery is exquisite. I enjoyed your first stanza the best:
"Day closes up her shop each night
to take her inventory,
but Sun won't waste upon some shelf
before a blaze of glory. "
Your writing rocks, my friend. I'd recommend your awesomely penned poem to other reviewers. It was a pleasure to have read your poem. I hope you have a lovely day. Enjoy the deserved six.
Melissa.
Comment Written 04-Apr-2012
reply by the author on 05-Apr-2012
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Melissa, thank you so very much for your thoughtful review, which is attentive and thorough as usual, Melissa. I also appreciate your gracious and generous exceptional exceptional rating :-) Brooke
Comment from pharp
Excellent! Beautifully written poem, great flow and rhyming. I really enjoyed reading your poem; artwork selected perfect for your poem. Great Job!
reply by the author on 05-Apr-2012
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Excellent! Beautifully written poem, great flow and rhyming. I really enjoyed reading your poem; artwork selected perfect for your poem. Great Job!
Comment Written 04-Apr-2012
reply by the author on 05-Apr-2012
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pharp, thank you so very much for your thoughtful review :-) Brooke
Comment from MissMerri
Beautiful nature poem, reminding me once again of my beloved Emily Dickinson. Are you sure you're not related?
The idea of the sun opening and closing up shop each day is so quaint and delightful, and the way he "signs the proclamation" in crimson ink, I thought especially charming and creative. The whole poem, every line and word, is wonderful. Wish I had the extra star to give.
reply by the author on 04-Apr-2012
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Beautiful nature poem, reminding me once again of my beloved Emily Dickinson. Are you sure you're not related?
The idea of the sun opening and closing up shop each day is so quaint and delightful, and the way he "signs the proclamation" in crimson ink, I thought especially charming and creative. The whole poem, every line and word, is wonderful. Wish I had the extra star to give.
Comment Written 04-Apr-2012
reply by the author on 04-Apr-2012
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Adonna, I truly appreciate your gracious wish for an exceptional rating and your lovely comments. I'll be smiling into tomorrow!!! Brooke : -)
Comment from JW
This lovely poem comes with a beautiful picture. Both remind me of the gorgeous sunsets I have seen. However, recently, the days have ended differently - with the bang of thunder and flashes of lightening.
Thanks for sharing this. JW
reply by the author on 06-Apr-2012
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This lovely poem comes with a beautiful picture. Both remind me of the gorgeous sunsets I have seen. However, recently, the days have ended differently - with the bang of thunder and flashes of lightening.
Thanks for sharing this. JW
Comment Written 04-Apr-2012
reply by the author on 06-Apr-2012
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JW, thank you so very much for your thoughtful review :-) Brooke
Comment from CassMarie
I liked this little poem. It was an interesting spin to make Day a character. Nice use of personification.
Nice writing,
Cass
reply by the author on 04-Apr-2012
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I liked this little poem. It was an interesting spin to make Day a character. Nice use of personification.
Nice writing,
Cass
Comment Written 04-Apr-2012
reply by the author on 04-Apr-2012
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Cass, thank you so much for your thoughtful review of this poem :-) Brooke
Comment from mauial
Is there a reason why you chose to personify day as a woman and the sun as a man? The sun is associated with day and so my thought is day and sun is the same thing. Other than that I like the thoughts you exppress here.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 04-Apr-2012
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Is there a reason why you chose to personify day as a woman and the sun as a man? The sun is associated with day and so my thought is day and sun is the same thing. Other than that I like the thoughts you exppress here.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 04-Apr-2012
reply by the author on 04-Apr-2012
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Mauial, Sun is most traditionally considered male, though not always. I liked the idea of Day as a woman operating a small shop.
I don't see any reason why they need to be the same gender. However, you are entitled to seeing it the way you do :-) Thanks for reviewing. Brooke
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What I was trying to say is that if the day was a woman than the sun should be a woman because of the association of day and sun. Hope you get my drift :)
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I get your drift, I just respectfully disagree :-) I am happy having one a woman and one a man :-)
Comment from MelissaBickel
Isn't this the truth. I love the personification you use here. I love the rhyme and flow and this certainly had me gazing at those red embers as day closes her doors.
Wonderful
reply by the author on 04-Apr-2012
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Isn't this the truth. I love the personification you use here. I love the rhyme and flow and this certainly had me gazing at those red embers as day closes her doors.
Wonderful
Comment Written 04-Apr-2012
reply by the author on 04-Apr-2012
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Melissa, thank you so very much for your thoughtful review :-) Brooke
Comment from Trybuck
He signs his name in crimson ink
until the skies are burning,
a proclamation to us all
his light is soon returning.
Great use of personification, and a unique way of looking at days end and nights beginning.
The Son is returning and He signed His name in crimson. The Kingdom of God comes without observation.
Well done, Buck
reply by the author on 04-Apr-2012
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He signs his name in crimson ink
until the skies are burning,
a proclamation to us all
his light is soon returning.
Great use of personification, and a unique way of looking at days end and nights beginning.
The Son is returning and He signed His name in crimson. The Kingdom of God comes without observation.
Well done, Buck
Comment Written 04-Apr-2012
reply by the author on 04-Apr-2012
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Buck, thank you so very much for your thoughtful comments and your graciously generous exceptional rating - It is always lovely to hear from you :-) Brooke
Comment from Linda England Bonam
That was very creative of you to say 'day closes up her shop each night'..I like that. For Sun cannot be long consigned..Very beautiful, Brooke.
reply by the author on 04-Apr-2012
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That was very creative of you to say 'day closes up her shop each night'..I like that. For Sun cannot be long consigned..Very beautiful, Brooke.
Comment Written 04-Apr-2012
reply by the author on 04-Apr-2012
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Linda, thank you so very much for your thoughtful review :-) Brooke
