Paranormal Adventures
Viewing comments for Chapter 11 "Speak of the Devil"Case Studies of Hauntings
55 total reviews
Comment from Selina Stambi
Hello Bev,
Trying to keep up with your posts. My mind boggles to think what you must have seen/experienced in your career with the paranormal.
A riveting read.
Love,
Sonali
reply by the author on 05-Aug-2015
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Hello Bev,
Trying to keep up with your posts. My mind boggles to think what you must have seen/experienced in your career with the paranormal.
A riveting read.
Love,
Sonali
Comment Written 04-Aug-2015
reply by the author on 05-Aug-2015
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Hi, Sonali. Thank you for the grand review. Always nice to hear from one of my favorite Canadians! Hope you faring well.
Hugs, Bev
Comment from Adri7enne
It's been a while, Bev. I've forgotten the story somewhat. I think I'm back on track.
Darned aggressive demons, all right. You described some good action scenes. I've never experienced negative paranormal phenomenon of any sorts, so I tend to believe only in the positive vibes. I think we create these things in our minds. You're doing a good job doing that. Well done, Bev.
reply by the author on 21-Jul-2015
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It's been a while, Bev. I've forgotten the story somewhat. I think I'm back on track.
Darned aggressive demons, all right. You described some good action scenes. I've never experienced negative paranormal phenomenon of any sorts, so I tend to believe only in the positive vibes. I think we create these things in our minds. You're doing a good job doing that. Well done, Bev.
Comment Written 21-Jul-2015
reply by the author on 21-Jul-2015
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Hi, Adrienne. Thanks much for taking time out to read this chapter. I appreciate your encouragement and support!
:) Bev
Comment from winespiller
Coulnd't give you a six because I already gave one away. This work really deserved it though. When it comes to poltergeists, how can you not be intrigued. Great story structure.
reply by the author on 20-Jul-2015
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Coulnd't give you a six because I already gave one away. This work really deserved it though. When it comes to poltergeists, how can you not be intrigued. Great story structure.
Comment Written 20-Jul-2015
reply by the author on 20-Jul-2015
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Hi, winespiller. Thank you for taking time to read my chapter. I appreciate your encouragement and generosity.
:) Bev
P.S. I like your moniker. Big California wine fan myself.
Comment from w.j.debi
Hi Bev,
You certainly keep the tension and surprises coming. It doesn't appear that anyone is safe. I'm sure we have barely scratch the surface with what these demons have in store for the ghost hunters. I am not familiar at all with ghost hunting so every turn in the story holds a surprise.
Excellent descriptions. The emotional impact is intense. I have to remember to breathe. I like the dialog. My favorite was the following:
A brief smile flitted across Mia's lips, and her eyes gleamed. "Your courage is born of innocence, but I admire it none the less."
A nice way of saying, "Rookie, you have no idea what you are about to face."
I look forward to the next chapter.
reply by the author on 19-Jul-2015
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Hi Bev,
You certainly keep the tension and surprises coming. It doesn't appear that anyone is safe. I'm sure we have barely scratch the surface with what these demons have in store for the ghost hunters. I am not familiar at all with ghost hunting so every turn in the story holds a surprise.
Excellent descriptions. The emotional impact is intense. I have to remember to breathe. I like the dialog. My favorite was the following:
A brief smile flitted across Mia's lips, and her eyes gleamed. "Your courage is born of innocence, but I admire it none the less."
A nice way of saying, "Rookie, you have no idea what you are about to face."
I look forward to the next chapter.
Comment Written 19-Jul-2015
reply by the author on 19-Jul-2015
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Hi, Debi. Thank you very much for your very generous review. I'm really you liked the chapter. You are so right--there's way more going on than our Team realizes. I hope to continue to show that with a strong connection of affection and faith, they will be able to deal with whatever comes their way :) You are most appreciated!
Bev
Comment from rtobaygo
Hello, Bev
It's good to be active once again!
Loved the premise, interaction and dialogue between characters. The depths of your descriptions were powerful. The story's flow was both logical and
I didn't find any major spags. The following are comments and suggestions, nothing more.
Emma felt a jolt of static electricity go through (static electricity doesn't penetrate the body) maybe cover her skin? )
she circled the (outer edges of the) room?
Guttural (screeches...isn't guttural noise usually low and or deep?) whirled about her
her eye sockets gouged (of flesh) and bleeding.
trying to ward off the attack, Mia held the cross tighter and pulled it to the limits of the chain(.)( trying to ward off the attack Flipped the ending to the beginning.)
to left(,) and entered
it, raging(,) upward(,)
targeted for spiritual oppression (possession?)
because I wasn't sure (about the guidance." seems awkward)
Emma's eyes (flew) open(ed)
their ancestors' wildest(imaginings." imaginations?)
Enjoyed the read.
Take care and stay safe,
Ray
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 19-Jul-2015
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Hello, Bev
It's good to be active once again!
Loved the premise, interaction and dialogue between characters. The depths of your descriptions were powerful. The story's flow was both logical and
I didn't find any major spags. The following are comments and suggestions, nothing more.
Emma felt a jolt of static electricity go through (static electricity doesn't penetrate the body) maybe cover her skin? )
she circled the (outer edges of the) room?
Guttural (screeches...isn't guttural noise usually low and or deep?) whirled about her
her eye sockets gouged (of flesh) and bleeding.
trying to ward off the attack, Mia held the cross tighter and pulled it to the limits of the chain(.)( trying to ward off the attack Flipped the ending to the beginning.)
to left(,) and entered
it, raging(,) upward(,)
targeted for spiritual oppression (possession?)
because I wasn't sure (about the guidance." seems awkward)
Emma's eyes (flew) open(ed)
their ancestors' wildest(imaginings." imaginations?)
Enjoyed the read.
Take care and stay safe,
Ray
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 19-Jul-2015
reply by the author on 19-Jul-2015
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Thanks for stopping by, Ray.
Comment from Connie C
I wish I had a six left this week to give this most deserving chapter of yours, Bev. You are such an outstanding writer. This chapter really draws in the reader, and I especially like the part where the apparition appears. You have managed to work in a lot of action with some excellent dialogue and description, as always.
Hugs,
Connie
reply by the author on 19-Jul-2015
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I wish I had a six left this week to give this most deserving chapter of yours, Bev. You are such an outstanding writer. This chapter really draws in the reader, and I especially like the part where the apparition appears. You have managed to work in a lot of action with some excellent dialogue and description, as always.
Hugs,
Connie
Comment Written 18-Jul-2015
reply by the author on 19-Jul-2015
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Thanks so much, Connie. I really appreciate your encouragement and support for my chapter/novel. Means a lot to me!
Hugs, Bev
Comment from MissMerri
This is a most fascinating story and very well written, I find. The characters seem quite believable and even though it is supernatural, the storyline is also very believable and fascinating. It is obviously well-edited, but a few things still need attention. Hope these suggestions are helpful:
Mia saw shock mirrored in her teammate's *twisted-up features. (twisted would be sufficient)
I say we stay put *(and) wait for Mike to radio their status."
any negative reactions*--whatever's in this room is toying with us." (..reactions. {Add period, delete dashes} Whatever's in this room...)
their ancestors' wildest *imagining." (imaginings)
like the center of *(a) whirlpool,
A well-developed storyline and one certain to keep the readers engrossed and turning the pages. Excellent!
reply by the author on 18-Jul-2015
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This is a most fascinating story and very well written, I find. The characters seem quite believable and even though it is supernatural, the storyline is also very believable and fascinating. It is obviously well-edited, but a few things still need attention. Hope these suggestions are helpful:
Mia saw shock mirrored in her teammate's *twisted-up features. (twisted would be sufficient)
I say we stay put *(and) wait for Mike to radio their status."
any negative reactions*--whatever's in this room is toying with us." (..reactions. {Add period, delete dashes} Whatever's in this room...)
their ancestors' wildest *imagining." (imaginings)
like the center of *(a) whirlpool,
A well-developed storyline and one certain to keep the readers engrossed and turning the pages. Excellent!
Comment Written 18-Jul-2015
reply by the author on 18-Jul-2015
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Hi, MissMerri. Thanks so much for your gracious and encouraging review. I appreciate your suggestions, as well. I think they definitely have merit. :) Bev
Comment from Clover77
A very well written prose my dear fellow author! You an absolutely wonderful job writing this and I enjoyed every second of reading it. Well done!
~Julia
reply by the author on 18-Jul-2015
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A very well written prose my dear fellow author! You an absolutely wonderful job writing this and I enjoyed every second of reading it. Well done!
~Julia
Comment Written 18-Jul-2015
reply by the author on 18-Jul-2015
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Hi, Julia. Thanks so much for reading my chapter and for your gracious review! Nice to hear from you.
:) Bev
Comment from Brett Matthew West
Some times the dangers, and threats, faced contain more than one element as this well written, All-Time Best achiever so crystal clearly depicts. Just when you think you have overcome a challenge another lies just beyond it. Story draws readers into the scene and allows them to much better experience the events happening around them. Well done.
reply by the author on 18-Jul-2015
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Some times the dangers, and threats, faced contain more than one element as this well written, All-Time Best achiever so crystal clearly depicts. Just when you think you have overcome a challenge another lies just beyond it. Story draws readers into the scene and allows them to much better experience the events happening around them. Well done.
Comment Written 18-Jul-2015
reply by the author on 18-Jul-2015
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Thanks so much, Brett. I really appreciate this most gracious review.
:) Bev
Comment from Ulla
I don't have a six so will have to settle for five. I really enjoyed this read that took me on a ride of high tension. Very well written and will be looking out for more. Ulla
reply by the author on 18-Jul-2015
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I don't have a six so will have to settle for five. I really enjoyed this read that took me on a ride of high tension. Very well written and will be looking out for more. Ulla
Comment Written 18-Jul-2015
reply by the author on 18-Jul-2015
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Hi, Ulla. Thank you for the great review--glad you enjoyed the chapter. I really appreciate your interest and support. :) Bev
