Reviews from

The Glass Cat Eye

Viewing comments for Chapter 3 "A Meeting of the Minds"
Talking to the dead has its consequences

11 total reviews 
Comment from Dustybones
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Good follow up chapter. I see I got the Steve And Doc connection in this one. I am still very interested in this story. You have a good ability to relate what is going on with a natural feel for the read. Maybe I can learn some skills by reading? SIX for continuity and not wasting plot lines.

 Comment Written 07-Aug-2013


reply by the author on 07-Aug-2013
    OH my. You went all the way back and read Glass Cat Eye. Smile. Well, thank you so much Dustybones. I'm glad you liked it.
Comment from Paradox Tremors
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

It is seldom two men of different belief can get along, much less stand each other or stay in the same room--but their common interest in art helped Stephen and the Doc to better communicate and see each others view. Well written my friend.

 Comment Written 29-May-2011


reply by the author on 29-May-2011
    Ok Tremors, I think you're just waking up. lol Ok friend I give up. You just did chapter 3 not 8. But I'm going to leave you alone, Ok buddy. lol lol
Comment from Dale95
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

I really enjoyed reading this piece about unknowns. I was captivated and intrigued the whole way through and wish I could go on to the next chapter.

The only thing I had a bit of trouble with was in the break up of some of the paragraphs, indicating a change in speaker. I had to stop and think about who was speaking.
Example:
Doc walked over to a mirrored wall. He touched something, and a bar rolled into view.

"Name your poison."
(If this were one paragraph it would have been smoother.)

 Comment Written 02-Apr-2011


reply by the author on 02-Apr-2011
    Thanks for reading and reviewing. The problem is, people who read 1,2,know who's taking, because they are familar with the characters. I do the best I can for those who don't want to read the other chapters. So, I'm sorry if it wasn't clear.
Comment from adewpearl
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Let me get this right - there is no tea in a drink called iced tea? I always assumed it was tea with liquor added to it. how funny :-)
Excellent dialogue that provides more information about the plot and conveys the attitudes of the speakers. Brooke

 Comment Written 31-Mar-2011


reply by the author on 31-Mar-2011
    Acturally, it's Long Island Ice Tea. lol Thank you for reading and reviewing Brook.
reply by adewpearl on 31-Mar-2011
    yes, I got that it is Long Island ice tea, an alcoholic drink, but as a non-drinker, I always assumed this meant it was iced tea laced with something LOL
reply by the author on 31-Mar-2011
    Shhh! Don't tell anybody, but I used to think that too. Shhh! lol
Comment from Mastery
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Hi, Harriett. This chapter is indeed shorter and that's not the important thing...the Fact is, this is much better writing for whatever reason. I would still recommend the following though if you don't mind:

""It's like an addiction," he went on to say" (Just use "he said" You just used "He went on to say in the previous paragraph)

"Steven, uneasy, looked away." (Steven seemed uneasy as he looked away.")

""What do you know about this woman, Doc?"

"What do you know about the supernatural?"

"I don't believe in that mess."

"Then, I can't help you."

(Harriett, you need at least one attributive tag somewhere here to distinguish who is speaking...therefore make one of them "he said" It's the best and generally considered the safest. He said...she said)

"a better respect for one another." (more respect for each other)

In closing, you always need a "hook"...same as the first paragraph every time...The "hook" is something that catches the readers eye in the beginning...and at the end of the chapter makes him or her want to flip the page and keep reading to see what happens. Just driving off...does not excite, I'm afraid.

Much better job here, Harriett overall...Bob

 Comment Written 30-Mar-2011


reply by the author on 31-Mar-2011
    Thank you Bob, I really do appreciate your help.
reply by the author on 31-Mar-2011
    Oh, another thing: You never use each other when you are only talking about two people: you use one another for two people; more than two, you use each other.
Comment from dinoscribe
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

This is again an excellent read.
I like the fact that the men have met and become sort of friends,or at least gained respect for each other.
Again I am impressed with the attention to detail such as the items in the sitting room giving the suggestion of the Doc's social standing. It's these little bits that bring your story to life.
I applaud your skill, you are a gifted writer.
I can only add that I'm looking forward to your next post.

 Comment Written 30-Mar-2011


reply by the author on 30-Mar-2011
    Oh thank you so much for skipping over and reading ch. 3. I'm so glad you liked it.
Comment from otter2000
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

The scene setting is good. I can understand, regardless of the fact that this is chapter 3, where I am and some of what is going on. I have got to say that I don't really like the paragraph toward the end that starts with: The two men... The repetition of the phrase xxx told yyy jars out for me, but you may well have done this intentionally, in which case I can say no more.

I have found a couple of typos which you might want to deal with.


[They disagreed and agued] Should be argued.
[both men winning one another] is this the right verb?

 Comment Written 30-Mar-2011


reply by the author on 30-Mar-2011
    I did do that intentionally; I needed time to past quickly. I didn't want those who had read previous chapters to have to read all of that again. I don't know what you mean about the right verb. And I will correct the typo. Thank you for reading and reviewing my work.
reply by otter2000 on 30-Mar-2011
    I've read it again, and understand what you wanted to say about both men winning over each other. Sorry!
Comment from The Stranger
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

A good story, following the rift that existed between two men that later turns to a more mutual respect despite their differing opinions

 Comment Written 30-Mar-2011


reply by the author on 30-Mar-2011
    Thank you for following the story. I will post a short chapter 4 in four days.
Comment from moyramouse
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

So now Stephen is aware of the work Dr Connelly is trying to do and Dr Connelly knows that Stephen's concern is Esther. But I wonder if Stephen really believes that Reece is a real psychic. Clearly Reece is about to become the conduit for the dark powers to enter the world and Esther too is a key factor. Will Dr Connelly and Stephen be able to save them and prevent disaster. The next piece of the puzzle remains to be seen. I shall look forward to you next post. xmouse

 Comment Written 30-Mar-2011


reply by the author on 30-Mar-2011
    Thank you xmouse. I'm trying to keep the chapters very short. I know you guys have to read alot. But you can't please everybody. I've alread got a complaint that my third chapter seem rushed. So lol.
reply by moyramouse on 30-Mar-2011
    You can never please everyone, so don't worry about it. The tempo of a book has to change and it wasn't a long and leisurely conversation they were having. Tell the reviewer you were creating an atmosphere of time passing quickly!:):):) You are the author and know where is the best place to stop each post. Don't do it to please the readers, stay in control. xmouse
reply by the author on 30-Mar-2011
    Thanks. Will take that advice.
Comment from Veekz
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Another good installment, it's really starting to met up now with all the links being connected, i.e. the 'girl' from the seances and the 'girl' from the Doc's lecture (in which the explanation his friend gave him in regards to the demon still spooks me out!). It's going to be interesting to see what part Reece has in all of it, whether she is in some way organizing it or whether she really isn't aware that it's not always the dead themselves she is speaking too. I couldn't find any edits that need to be made - will be hanging out for the next installment! :)

This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.

 Comment Written 29-Mar-2011


reply by the author on 30-Mar-2011
    Thank you Veekz for reading and review this writing. Hope you will like the next Chapter.