A Candle In the Night
The closest I can come to a spooky poem, I guess.26 total reviews
Comment from JeJo
As always, I love this interesting rhyme scheme and the flawless meter. This poem has a rather mysterious and ambiguous feel about it. The darkness, the vision, the candle, and the light all mold together to form a sad tale, with the exception of the last stanza, which brings the story back to reality. Excellent use of similes and alliteration; the story flows very well from stanza to stanza. I feel that the candle could be a metaphor for something... although right now, I'm not sure what for. This is somewhat spooky, but in a different way than normal... Very interesting and well-written. I enjoyed reading and reviewing this. All the best, Jen
reply by the author on 12-Oct-2010
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As always, I love this interesting rhyme scheme and the flawless meter. This poem has a rather mysterious and ambiguous feel about it. The darkness, the vision, the candle, and the light all mold together to form a sad tale, with the exception of the last stanza, which brings the story back to reality. Excellent use of similes and alliteration; the story flows very well from stanza to stanza. I feel that the candle could be a metaphor for something... although right now, I'm not sure what for. This is somewhat spooky, but in a different way than normal... Very interesting and well-written. I enjoyed reading and reviewing this. All the best, Jen
Comment Written 12-Oct-2010
reply by the author on 12-Oct-2010
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Thank you once again, for a most perceptive and intelligent review, dear Jen. I hoped the candle would be a metaphor for the fading, almost burned out life of the speaker who felt she was without purpose... until she trims the wick and re-lights the candle and realizes there is still some light (hope) left in her. But... as with any poem, it can be whatever the reader wants it to be. Thank you SO much for your wonderful comments. I love your insightful reviews. A
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ah, I was leaning toward that meaning of the candle, but was not sure because the speaker was lighting the candle.. and I didn't fit the two together. I see the clues now, and the last stanza said it plainly. It all makes sense now :)
Comment from Judian James
Well done A!! Wow, good style and form. Yes, quite sad, but you brought hope back at the end. "I watch the waning light and see the candle pooling on the plate
and recognize with sinking heart
my time has gone. It is too late
for wishful dreams that might delude" Bravo!!!
reply by the author on 11-Oct-2010
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Well done A!! Wow, good style and form. Yes, quite sad, but you brought hope back at the end. "I watch the waning light and see the candle pooling on the plate
and recognize with sinking heart
my time has gone. It is too late
for wishful dreams that might delude" Bravo!!!
Comment Written 11-Oct-2010
reply by the author on 11-Oct-2010
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Thank you so much Jude! I'm glad you found this poem hopeful. I wanted that to come through. Your review is wonderfully encouraging, and I thank you. A.
Comment from irishauthorme
Above a cold night's cloudy sky,
The eternal stars still shine.
Small lights that help us by,
The stars are yours, they are mine.
Distance, ties, small doubts, fears,
Yes, our oldest enemy, time,
Took our youth, those happy years.
The years are yours, they are mine.
Now, while the candle flickers and dies,
Your sweet memory I find.
Young and beautiful, in my eyes.
The memories are yours, they are mine.
irish
reply by the author on 11-Oct-2010
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Above a cold night's cloudy sky,
The eternal stars still shine.
Small lights that help us by,
The stars are yours, they are mine.
Distance, ties, small doubts, fears,
Yes, our oldest enemy, time,
Took our youth, those happy years.
The years are yours, they are mine.
Now, while the candle flickers and dies,
Your sweet memory I find.
Young and beautiful, in my eyes.
The memories are yours, they are mine.
irish
Comment Written 11-Oct-2010
reply by the author on 11-Oct-2010
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I love your wonderful poem Irish. Thank you for sharing it with me. I hope you have it saved somewhere and that you will use it, either for a contest or to post. It is too good to lose. Thank you so much too, for the extra star.
Comment from heyjude
Miss Merri, I'm glad it wasn't too spooky. I like the way
you compared life to a candle that the wick is getting
short and life is about to be over.
reply by the author on 11-Oct-2010
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Miss Merri, I'm glad it wasn't too spooky. I like the way
you compared life to a candle that the wick is getting
short and life is about to be over.
Comment Written 10-Oct-2010
reply by the author on 11-Oct-2010
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Thank you so much. I'm glad you liked this. Thanks for the review and stars. MM
Comment from Connie C
This is quite lovely. I wouldn't call it spooky so much as hopeful with
the candle serving as a metaphor for life, a life that at one time might
have felt like it was ending only to be renewed with new light. As always,
your poetry reads smoothly, making it such a pleasure to read. Connie
reply by the author on 11-Oct-2010
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This is quite lovely. I wouldn't call it spooky so much as hopeful with
the candle serving as a metaphor for life, a life that at one time might
have felt like it was ending only to be renewed with new light. As always,
your poetry reads smoothly, making it such a pleasure to read. Connie
Comment Written 10-Oct-2010
reply by the author on 11-Oct-2010
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Thank you so much Connie! Your reviews are also such a pleasure to read! Much appreciated comments on this poem.
Comment from krdeering
Not as much spooky as poignant--and quite lovely. I picture an aged widow listening to the silence around her as she lights the candle that ends up leading to a whisper of hope and purpose for her remaining years. As usual, your poem is as smooth as butter in its flow and message.
reply by the author on 11-Oct-2010
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Not as much spooky as poignant--and quite lovely. I picture an aged widow listening to the silence around her as she lights the candle that ends up leading to a whisper of hope and purpose for her remaining years. As usual, your poem is as smooth as butter in its flow and message.
Comment Written 10-Oct-2010
reply by the author on 11-Oct-2010
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Your reviews always mean a lot to me. Thank you for this excellent rating and the understanding comments.
Comment from sweetwoodjax
this is very well written with good form and good flow, a great poem about loneliness and the renewal of strength from God that can fill us with warmth and light. i wrote a poem a few weeks ago called Light a Candle For Me.
reply by the author on 11-Oct-2010
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this is very well written with good form and good flow, a great poem about loneliness and the renewal of strength from God that can fill us with warmth and light. i wrote a poem a few weeks ago called Light a Candle For Me.
Comment Written 10-Oct-2010
reply by the author on 11-Oct-2010
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Thank you for your good review. I went looking for your poem, "Light a Candle For Me" and couldn't find it. I will have to try once more. I'd love to read it.
Comment from LumchuckHickle
What a wonderful and fluidly written poem. You were able to twist and turn through an emotional arc so that rather than just beautifully expressing a mood of loneliness and despair at the realization of finality, you added the translation to hope, deepening the poem considerably. Well done. Thanks for posting this.
reply by the author on 11-Oct-2010
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What a wonderful and fluidly written poem. You were able to twist and turn through an emotional arc so that rather than just beautifully expressing a mood of loneliness and despair at the realization of finality, you added the translation to hope, deepening the poem considerably. Well done. Thanks for posting this.
Comment Written 10-Oct-2010
reply by the author on 11-Oct-2010
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Thank you so much for this wonderfully inspiring and encouraging review. I'm very glad you stopped by to read.
Comment from Bellringer
Your lovely poem has a haunting quality as it centers around the candle and the character's expressions of loneliness. The vision of a smiling face within the candle's "wisping smoke" eases the dark quality of the poem. Well done. Regards, Hector
reply by the author on 12-Oct-2010
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Your lovely poem has a haunting quality as it centers around the candle and the character's expressions of loneliness. The vision of a smiling face within the candle's "wisping smoke" eases the dark quality of the poem. Well done. Regards, Hector
Comment Written 10-Oct-2010
reply by the author on 12-Oct-2010
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Thank you so much, Hector. I'm always glad to know what you are thinking. This review is very helpful to me, so thanks for sharing your comments.
Comment from nancyjam
Perfect rhyme and meter in
your poem. Even though it is
sad it ends with a sign of
hope. Nice use of enjambment
and imagery.
A very well crafted piece.
So glad it's not autobiographical.
reply by the author on 12-Oct-2010
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Perfect rhyme and meter in
your poem. Even though it is
sad it ends with a sign of
hope. Nice use of enjambment
and imagery.
A very well crafted piece.
So glad it's not autobiographical.
Comment Written 10-Oct-2010
reply by the author on 12-Oct-2010
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Thank you for this truly amazing review, nancy. I'm so glad you enjoyed the poem, and I appreciate so much your generous rating.
Hugs, MM
