Reviews from

A Leaf on the Wind

Viewing comments for Chapter 50 "7 East"
Autobiography of abuse

16 total reviews 
Comment from medicnate
Excellent
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Great depiction of the psych ward atmosphere. I like the dialogue with the doctor, how it wasn't really personal or personable, but with the nurse, there was a totally different feel. Nice work. Great writing.

~medicnate~

 Comment Written 12-Apr-2009


reply by the author on 12-Apr-2009
    Again, thank you for the kind words. It was an interesting experience. I must admit I combined several hospitalizations into one. In the real world relapses are quite common.
Comment from CALLAHANMR
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Hi Valerie:)
I'm playing catch up again. In time I plan to read every word of your fascinating study..

Just a few specific comments:

1. "Can I speak with my mother first?"
The nurse shook her head and said, "Sorry, your mother left a-half-an-hour ago."
The words left me speechless. I felt myself start to shake and for the second time in one day, I had another seizure. {It is no wonder that the absence of your mother triggered a seizure. At one of the most traumatic times in your life, you were left without support. In a way it was probably a protective measure of your subconscious mind and not epilepsy. In isolation studies, complete isolation from sensory stimulation could trigger hypnagogic hallucinations in a very short time.(Usually less than 90 minutes even in healthy subjects with no evidence of epilepsy.}

2. I thought for a moment and then said, "Yes. Sometimes I lose blocks of time. It started when I was a little girl. Sometimes it is just a few hours, but recently I have lost as much as two or three days." {Is this the first time you allowed yourself honest answers about internal feelings. At least you seemed to have an attentive listener, something your family never provided.)

Thank you for sharing these difficult times when your mind must have seemed fragmented. This may help others open up. It took me years to develop such trust.

Roger

 Comment Written 19-Mar-2009


reply by the author on 19-Mar-2009
    You are correct. The brain scans and other tests I had showed signs of Temporal Lobe Epilepsy but they also diagnosed me with Non-Epleptic Seizures because of the frequesncy of seizures and the obviousl stress I was constantly under. The medication I was given helped the TLE but when I was severely stressed I did continue to have seizures. My diagnosis was so complicated I tied not to be too technical and bore the reader. I sincerely appreciate your comments and value your opinion. Thank you for your continued intest in my story.
Comment from prodigal
Excellent
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The doctor finished attending to my hand,(doctor?) ctor leaned

This is an exceptionally well written chapter. I found the dialogue flowed easily and I could relate with the patient. I liked how you showed what she was thinking. You did a terrific job on this one. No spaggies other than the one mentioned above. Well done-Sam

 Comment Written 16-Mar-2009


reply by the author on 16-Mar-2009
    Thank yiu for your very kind review. I appreciate them all.
Comment from rmdelta
Excellent
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this was a hard story to read, pain is never easy to read about. abuse is the worst pain there is in this world today. A well written story, my friend, with excellent descriptives. It was a pleasure to read it, just without the pleasure part being real. Thanks for sharing.

Reggie

 Comment Written 16-Mar-2009


reply by the author on 16-Mar-2009
    Thankyou for your high rating. Yes, this is a difficult book to read...not what I describe as entertainment, but I felt it was necessary and very important. Again, thank you.
Comment from Cranial Thinker
Excellent
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Smurphgirl this is exactly what they take you through when you first get admitted.This brings back memories of my ordeal.You really write so wonderfully well.I still don't sleep well and the human language is like physical punching to me sometimes.I wish I had a six.Cranial Thinker

 Comment Written 16-Mar-2009


reply by the author on 16-Mar-2009
    Thanks. I only wrote about one hospitalization but in fact there were so many I literally lost count. For a woman to be diagnosed with PTSD is a rare thing....it took me 5 years to get Social Security to accept it and put me on a disability....I'm doing much better now. I know my limits and enjoy keeping to myself. I wrote the book to show people what it is really like to have a mental illness. So many people freak out and it is because they are ignorant. One of the jokes we used to make when I was in the hospital was that we were the lucky ones, we knew we had a proplem, unlike the guys on the street who foolishly thought they were normal. Thanks for the high rating and kind words.
reply by Cranial Thinker on 16-Mar-2009
    I am still going through treatment and will for the rest of my life,as social settings can be a real headache for me,handling peoples mouths and attitudes,but I do want someone I can talk to freely.I hate not having anybody in which I can call friend,because I think so deep,or act a little strange at times.I feel as though I am on an island and no one else wants to save me.I still have time laps were I don't remember what I did for days on end.People talking to me that I have no idea who they are,but they tell me that we met three days ago at a store.I sit in this house day in and day out,because I have absolutely no friends at all.I am a cranial thinker.I have also learned that people and me don't mix to well,but I want to be understood if that makes since.Cranial Thinker
Comment from jojosug
Excellent
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Again you've written another powerful chapter. What I really like is that Valerie whilst having been terribly abused, still has spirit and fight in her, this comes across so well.

Jo

 Comment Written 15-Mar-2009


reply by the author on 15-Mar-2009
    Thanks for the compliment...my doctor called me "spunky". I appreciate your kind words and high review.
Comment from jodeecee
Excellent
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Loved this chapter too..

Finished attending to my hand, the doctor leaned against the white counter, and, holding a silver clipboard in one hand and a pen in the other
(maybe this would sound better-)
The doctor finished attending to my hand, leaned against the white counter, and, holding a silver clipboard in one hand and a pen in the other


"Sorry, you/r/ mother left a-half-an-hour ago."

I smiled. "My name is Valerie and I have no idea /cut:of/ what is wrong with me."

 Comment Written 15-Mar-2009


reply by the author on 15-Mar-2009
    I can always trust you to catch the ones that got away. Try as I might, I still miss them. Thanks for your kind review and great eye.
Comment from laurelp
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Fascinating chapter. I like this nurse also. Seems down to earth, a real person. So different then the family. I don't know why I was sent to the prelude first, but I found my way back here. Still reading on....

 Comment Written 15-Mar-2009


reply by the author on 15-Mar-2009
    Thank you so very much for your high rating. I sincerely appreciate your opinion. Just so you don't think you are going crazy...that's my job...I added the prologue late in the story....so it should appear at the beginning but because just posted it yester day, it pops up just before this chapter. In a few day, after the certificate expires it will go back to where it belongs. Sorry.
Comment from DecrepitOldBag
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Valerie, you have written this so well. In a way, there is a detachment in this chapter, which was not apparent in other chapters you have written. I am so glad you're finally getting help in this chapter. Only found one typo: "My name is Marilyn, I'm you (your) day nurse."
Great writing, I can't wait to see how it progresses once you get the help you so desperately needed.
Warmest wishes, blessings
Kat

 Comment Written 15-Mar-2009


reply by the author on 15-Mar-2009
    In many ways this is the beginning of what I call Part 2 of my life. Thank you for your keen eye and continued support.
Comment from Crusty
Excellent
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Ooh I like this story. It is extremely well written, I thought. I love your style, and your sentence structure is superb. I did find a typo, (Have you ever have thoughts about hurting yourself?) Was a question the nurse asked Valerie. Other than that I can find no criticism, I loved it.

I would love to have read of how the burn felt when the doctor asked about it, and was wrapping it. I guess I'm obsessed with small details, but your story,and your writing are very good, and worthy of elaborating on in more detail. (Of course that's up to you) Such as what the room looked like, where Valerie woke up in hospital, what Marilyn the nurse looked like beyond her good looks, although I know she has big brown eyes, what about her any other standout features; her hair, skin, teeth, closes. Also the room and the coach you sat on... Please don't take that as criticism, just some idea's you could think about... Play around with maybe.
I think the story itself, is very interesting and I'll be going back and reading the previous 49 chapters, I enjoyed it so much. LOL. I also think you have an enormous gift for writing, and I applaud your bravery in sharing it. (I have been to chicken to share my work)
So well done Smurfgirl, I look forward to reading more from you in the future... Congratulations, thanks for sharing.

Brad...

 Comment Written 15-Mar-2009


reply by the author on 15-Mar-2009
    Thank you so very much for your kind words and detailed review. I can always use the help and will take a look at the chapter to see what I can do to improve it. Again, thank you for your high rating.
reply by Crusty on 16-Mar-2009
    Hi there.
    Here's something I found very funny. (And is the reason I try not to make to many suggestions when I review) LOL

    I read back through my review to see exactly what I wrote that could have been the slightest bit of help to you. Hahahahah. And what did I find. CLOSES instead of clothes. And, COACH instead of couch. I have to laugh at myself, I really do. It's the cringe factor, you know. How embarrassing. LOL.
    I hear you on the Dyslexia, I sometimes struggle, plus I had a very poor education. Besides, I have only been writing for about a year, so this is all new to me and I'm as nervous as a long tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs. Anyway, thanks for giving up so much of you time. I appreciate it.
    Brad...