A Leaf on the Wind
Viewing comments for Chapter 19 "More of the same"Autobiography of abuse
11 total reviews
Comment from chaswriter
Smurphgirl - I am enjoying the story though it is about horrendous acts by a father. Too bad no one will listen to the daughter. Well told story.
Here are some suggestions:
Ignoring the milk dripping down her face and onto her blouse she said, "Valerie, I am serious. I cannot take any more(. )Please, I promise, this time I will back you up."
I'll back you up(,) but you need to do all the talking."
I knew it was a mistake(,) but I agreed.
When I confronted him, he quickly left the room(,) but I knew he would be back.
I tried to talk to Teresa, but she insisted Daddy was not capable of doing anything so horrible.
Hope this helps. Charlie
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 13-Feb-2009
  |
Smurphgirl - I am enjoying the story though it is about horrendous acts by a father. Too bad no one will listen to the daughter. Well told story.
Here are some suggestions:
Ignoring the milk dripping down her face and onto her blouse she said, "Valerie, I am serious. I cannot take any more(. )Please, I promise, this time I will back you up."
I'll back you up(,) but you need to do all the talking."
I knew it was a mistake(,) but I agreed.
When I confronted him, he quickly left the room(,) but I knew he would be back.
I tried to talk to Teresa, but she insisted Daddy was not capable of doing anything so horrible.
Hope this helps. Charlie
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 13-Feb-2009
reply by the author on 13-Feb-2009
-
Yes, very helpful. Thank you for your review and high rank. I will look over the sections you mention. Again, thank you.
