A Serendipitous Meeting
Viewing comments for Chapter 19 "Serendipitous Chapter 8 C"Traditional in a modern world..
25 total reviews
Comment from Wendi Budgell
Updated rating. My apologies. I have to read more of this book as I cannot really rate based on one chapter. I do look forward to reading more. It definitely got my pulse racing I'll give you that lol
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reply by the author on 18-Jun-2025
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Updated rating. My apologies. I have to read more of this book as I cannot really rate based on one chapter. I do look forward to reading more. It definitely got my pulse racing I'll give you that lol
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 18-Jun-2025
reply by the author on 18-Jun-2025
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Thank you for the kind review. What part can't you relate to? What can I improve on? I need to know so I can grow as an author, you haven't given me anything to improve on.
Comment from BethShelby
I love the way your story is progressing. Rebecca seems to feel that everything most people accept as normal is wrong for her. I'm surprised her parents didn't discourage her from writing romance novels and that her extremely conservative mindset didn't make the novels unappealing to readers.
reply by the author on 11-Jun-2025
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I love the way your story is progressing. Rebecca seems to feel that everything most people accept as normal is wrong for her. I'm surprised her parents didn't discourage her from writing romance novels and that her extremely conservative mindset didn't make the novels unappealing to readers.
Comment Written 11-Jun-2025
reply by the author on 11-Jun-2025
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Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Mrs Anna Howard
Ok, I am swooning a bit here. His sparkling blue eyes looking at her? Yes, please! And I like the plot about the car! I would say why not a BMW crossover, but it's your story lol. Thanks so much for sharing!
reply by the author on 11-Jun-2025
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Ok, I am swooning a bit here. His sparkling blue eyes looking at her? Yes, please! And I like the plot about the car! I would say why not a BMW crossover, but it's your story lol. Thanks so much for sharing!
Comment Written 10-Jun-2025
reply by the author on 11-Jun-2025
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BMW crossover to expensive to get the deal they wanted. Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Soledadpaz
"They continued with their argument that the policy stated without a police report they wouldn't pay."
--To improve flow suggest: . . . argument, (insisting) the policy stated they would not pay without a police report.
Or: . . . argument. The policy stated (that) without a police report, they would not pay.
Lilly checking to see if Tyler's socks are still on is too funny! And quite real, a child's natural reaction to accept words literally.
Apparently, their forcing a new dress on her when she didn't want one wasn't a great idea. Especially one that was a tad too revealing. Seems Aunt Beth hasn't yet come to terms with Rebeka's sensibilities. Seemingly a result of her having been so sheltered. Now she has to fend for herself in the real world. And she's lucky to have had her car accident in the vicinity of Tyler.
Sol
reply by the author on 11-Jun-2025
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"They continued with their argument that the policy stated without a police report they wouldn't pay."
--To improve flow suggest: . . . argument, (insisting) the policy stated they would not pay without a police report.
Or: . . . argument. The policy stated (that) without a police report, they would not pay.
Lilly checking to see if Tyler's socks are still on is too funny! And quite real, a child's natural reaction to accept words literally.
Apparently, their forcing a new dress on her when she didn't want one wasn't a great idea. Especially one that was a tad too revealing. Seems Aunt Beth hasn't yet come to terms with Rebeka's sensibilities. Seemingly a result of her having been so sheltered. Now she has to fend for herself in the real world. And she's lucky to have had her car accident in the vicinity of Tyler.
Sol
Comment Written 10-Jun-2025
reply by the author on 11-Jun-2025
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Thank you for the help, again. I really appreciate it.
Comment from Douglas Goff
Tee hee
You made Tyler into such a nice guy! Good job. Who could possibly not like him?
By the way, I have tried escargot several times and have NEVER acquired the taste. Ha!
Fun
Douglas
reply by the author on 10-Jun-2025
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Tee hee
You made Tyler into such a nice guy! Good job. Who could possibly not like him?
By the way, I have tried escargot several times and have NEVER acquired the taste. Ha!
Fun
Douglas
Comment Written 10-Jun-2025
reply by the author on 10-Jun-2025
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To be honest I'm not a fan of escargot. Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Julie G1
This tale of intrigue continues to be appreciated by the reading audience. The potential future interactions and relationships are being skilfully unfolded in each well written chapter, carefully constructing and exploring a mystery in the plot.
reply by the author on 10-Jun-2025
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This tale of intrigue continues to be appreciated by the reading audience. The potential future interactions and relationships are being skilfully unfolded in each well written chapter, carefully constructing and exploring a mystery in the plot.
Comment Written 10-Jun-2025
reply by the author on 10-Jun-2025
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Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from lancellot
You have another well written chapter. I know you have your committed formula, but I would caution against removing Beka's agency. You do not want to infantize her too much. That's not attractive to men, and beyond the older FanStory readers, outside 2025 women may not agree with it. You have a romance story, and... yes, mostly geared to a female's fantasy, but ask yourself, why would a man want Beka? What does she provide, besides being saved and constantly helped? What are you showing she provides Tyler... I mean really?
notes:
It wasn't long before Peter rushed in. "I have the photos."
-It wasn't long before Peter walked in. "I have the photos." (it's not that serious.)
I think most people had auto accidents and would no in Beka's case, without another party or injuries a police wouldn't be needed. (I get you want some issues she needs help with.)
reply by the author on 10-Jun-2025
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You have another well written chapter. I know you have your committed formula, but I would caution against removing Beka's agency. You do not want to infantize her too much. That's not attractive to men, and beyond the older FanStory readers, outside 2025 women may not agree with it. You have a romance story, and... yes, mostly geared to a female's fantasy, but ask yourself, why would a man want Beka? What does she provide, besides being saved and constantly helped? What are you showing she provides Tyler... I mean really?
notes:
It wasn't long before Peter rushed in. "I have the photos."
-It wasn't long before Peter walked in. "I have the photos." (it's not that serious.)
I think most people had auto accidents and would no in Beka's case, without another party or injuries a police wouldn't be needed. (I get you want some issues she needs help with.)
Comment Written 09-Jun-2025
reply by the author on 10-Jun-2025
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I'll fix that. I appreciate you pointing it out. Thank you for the kind review
Comment from Ulla
This is another great chapter, Barbara, which shows just how vulnerable and in experienced Rebeka is.
I only found one thing: a couple to minutes to get them = a couple of minutes to get them
Ulla xcx
reply by the author on 09-Jun-2025
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This is another great chapter, Barbara, which shows just how vulnerable and in experienced Rebeka is.
I only found one thing: a couple to minutes to get them = a couple of minutes to get them
Ulla xcx
Comment Written 09-Jun-2025
reply by the author on 09-Jun-2025
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That's a glaring error. I'm surprised somebody else didn't notice it. Thank you for pointing it out. I've made the correction. I always appreciate the help.
Comment from Paul McFarland
Again, you have come up with a post that flows nicely. It is also nice to have a post that is free of conflict. The European trip sounds like it could be interesting.
reply by the author on 09-Jun-2025
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Again, you have come up with a post that flows nicely. It is also nice to have a post that is free of conflict. The European trip sounds like it could be interesting.
Comment Written 09-Jun-2025
reply by the author on 09-Jun-2025
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Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Pam Lonsdale
Just a small thing that jumped out at me: "We need to do your hair, makeup, and fingernails." Most people would just say "nails."
"What you mean?" might work better as "What do you mean?"
I guess the good news about my being away and not reviewing this story is that it moves slowly enough that I haven't missed much. Rebeka is still coming around, learning to relax and trust Ty and others. And although it's hard to tell what she thinks of him, it's obvious that he's taken with her.
Thanks for sharing, Barbara.
xo
reply by the author on 09-Jun-2025
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Just a small thing that jumped out at me: "We need to do your hair, makeup, and fingernails." Most people would just say "nails."
"What you mean?" might work better as "What do you mean?"
I guess the good news about my being away and not reviewing this story is that it moves slowly enough that I haven't missed much. Rebeka is still coming around, learning to relax and trust Ty and others. And although it's hard to tell what she thinks of him, it's obvious that he's taken with her.
Thanks for sharing, Barbara.
xo
Comment Written 09-Jun-2025
reply by the author on 09-Jun-2025
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True. I changed it. Thank you for pointing it out. I appreciate your kind review.
