Reviews from

This Happened at a Baby Shower

Eighty-word challenge

9 total reviews 
Comment from Ric Myworld
Excellent
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Wondering why your posts weren't showing up in my inbox when I ran across this one, I realized that I don't get the contest entries. Which I should have known. Thanks for sharing.

 Comment Written 24-Jan-2024


reply by the author on 24-Jan-2024
    Now that you mentioned it, I, too, am not receiving writers I used to get. It seems Gloria, Dolly, and Sugar Ray stayed, but many are a.w.o.l.
Comment from Rosemary Everson1
Excellent
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If a child messes in her pull up the fragrance will be blown away everywhere. That's when the handywoman comes in and wants to help change an infant. They would get the hint where the smell is coming from.

 Comment Written 22-Jan-2024


reply by the author on 22-Jan-2024
    It was obvious where the scent trail trailed as her bottom was lit up with the fragrance of the day. Thanks for the read and comment.
reply by Rosemary Everson1 on 22-Jan-2024
    wow, so it's a true story. I bet the mom was embarrassed.
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2024
    Dad was
Comment from Mary Vigasin
Excellent
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I found it. one spelling tried instead of hied.
But I love it, it is funny and brilliant. Your humor is in top form.
Good luck in the contest.
Thank you for the smile.
Best wishes,
Mary

 Comment Written 21-Jan-2024


reply by the author on 21-Jan-2024
    ??? You still think how?s is a poor fit or not a fit at all? It means to hasten and as the child sped
    To crawl gas explodes from the rear
reply by Mary Vigasin on 22-Jan-2024
    ??? A great fit
Comment from Gloria ....
Excellent
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This is an adorable fiction story. The only word that threw me off course a little was two feet tall, as that suggests to me a walker, while this model A leaking gas is still a crawler.

That said, a delightful story and I wish you all the best with the voters. :)

Gloria

 Comment Written 21-Jan-2024


reply by the author on 21-Jan-2024
    Eh. Maybe 24 inches is as you say but I was 16" at birth so eight inches more seemed fine with me.
Comment from Mario PIERRE
Excellent
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Funny and enjoyable story! I do think this may have happened to some of us as babies!! The flash was very well constructed and told narratively. The ending of course is hilarious and not expected.
Great job.
I wonder why you used the word: 'hied' here... is it a typo or the old English word?
Thank you for clarifying.
mario

 Comment Written 20-Jan-2024


reply by the author on 20-Jan-2024
    It?s in my dictionary and my sense said go with it as 2mi it flowed
    Thanks for the read and comment
    A number of members also commented on his
Comment from royowen
Excellent
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Heh I haven't ever thought of a baby of expressing itself through the predilection to moving themselves via the expression of gas from their nether region's beautifully written, blessings Roy

 Comment Written 20-Jan-2024


reply by the author on 20-Jan-2024
    If nothing else I had fun humoring my fellow FanStorians
    Thanks Owen
Comment from QC Poet
Excellent
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There seems to be a spelling error in the posting but I'm enjoying reading this post today as this afternoon I have a baby shower to go to. Thanks for sharing your humorous experience I pray the injury was minor

 Comment Written 20-Jan-2024


reply by the author on 20-Jan-2024
    Which? Hied? Defined it means in haste
    Something else?
    Appreciate letting me hear your thought
    Thank you
Comment from Sabrina H.
Excellent
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Aww what a cute short story. It reminds me of when my two kids where little and trying to walk. Your authors note was cute about no children where harmed for this story.
Best of luck on the contest.
Keep writing:)

 Comment Written 20-Jan-2024


reply by the author on 20-Jan-2024
    Thanks Sabrina
    It was a fun write
Comment from Baltimore Born
Good
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This is a humorous story. Your picture goes well with the story. Your 80-word count is on point. Your story reads well. Your last sentence you wrote "hied." That is the only thing I see that needs to be changed. Please contact me if you make a change so I can revise the rating. Thank you.

 Comment Written 20-Jan-2024


reply by the author on 20-Jan-2024
    Hied define means to hurry. It fits.

    See synonyms for hie on Thesaurus.com
    verb (used without object),hied, hie·ing or hy·ing.
    to hasten; speed; go in haste.
    verb (used with object),hied, hie·ing or hy·ing.
    I appreciate your review and comments. Thank you.
reply by the author on 20-Jan-2024
    Hied define means to hurry. It fits.

    See synonyms for hie on Thesaurus.com
    verb (used without object),hied, hie·ing or hy·ing.
    to hasten; speed; go in haste.
    verb (used with object),hied, hie·ing or hy·ing.
    I appreciate your review and comments. Thank you.
reply by Baltimore Born on 22-Jan-2024
    You're welcome.