Some Call It Luck
Viewing comments for Chapter 50 "Some Call It Luck - Chapter 50"A unique friendship affects the course of 2 lives.
8 total reviews
Comment from lyenochka
It seems like a happy marriage with a romantic proposal appropriate for a young couple. I'm not sure about the relationship with EJ but it seems he is a good friend to both Abby and Kenny.
reply by the author on 24-Jan-2023
It seems like a happy marriage with a romantic proposal appropriate for a young couple. I'm not sure about the relationship with EJ but it seems he is a good friend to both Abby and Kenny.
Comment Written 24-Jan-2023
reply by the author on 24-Jan-2023
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So many people wanted to see Abby and E.J. get together, but that never felt right to me. They all remain great friends, though.
Comment from lancellot
Yes, this was a quick wrap-up. I see you buzzed through the years and the college stuff. I guess Abby would've been done with her Masters by 1993.
E.J. did move on with his life. I can imagine the hard part of getting hired a 43 or 44 in the computer field with no real job experience beyond carrying golf clubs. I don't even if he paid into social security or has health insurance. I guess we'll find out in part 3.
I would recommend higher stakes, and more action of some sort to keep the readers emotionally invested.
reply by the author on 23-Jan-2023
Yes, this was a quick wrap-up. I see you buzzed through the years and the college stuff. I guess Abby would've been done with her Masters by 1993.
E.J. did move on with his life. I can imagine the hard part of getting hired a 43 or 44 in the computer field with no real job experience beyond carrying golf clubs. I don't even if he paid into social security or has health insurance. I guess we'll find out in part 3.
I would recommend higher stakes, and more action of some sort to keep the readers emotionally invested.
Comment Written 22-Jan-2023
reply by the author on 23-Jan-2023
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Thanks so much for the 6!
When I was in the IT department, something we did when hiring a new programmer was to give them a short test. If they didn't do well on it, we wouldn't hire them no matter what their past experience or education was (people lie about that). Maybe that's how E.J. got his job.
Part 3 covers the years 1993 - 2006. A lot of new action will occur.
Comment from Jay Squires
What a dynamic ending to Part II.
He removed the mitten from my left hand, then he placed the ring on my ring finger, and we sealed it with a long kiss as the snow gently fell on us. [Oh, my God! You show all the earmarks of a gifted Romance writer!!]
Grandpa and E.J. were ushers. [This might be a good place for Abby to say something about his staying dry, since it ties it nicely in with E.J's story.]
The effect was stunning, [If you don't want Abby to sound "full of" herself, you might want to modify that with something like, "The effect stunned even me," or some such.]
The hook is set; you've been toying with me on the line; it's time to start reeling me into and through Part III.
Jay
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2023
What a dynamic ending to Part II.
He removed the mitten from my left hand, then he placed the ring on my ring finger, and we sealed it with a long kiss as the snow gently fell on us. [Oh, my God! You show all the earmarks of a gifted Romance writer!!]
Grandpa and E.J. were ushers. [This might be a good place for Abby to say something about his staying dry, since it ties it nicely in with E.J's story.]
The effect was stunning, [If you don't want Abby to sound "full of" herself, you might want to modify that with something like, "The effect stunned even me," or some such.]
The hook is set; you've been toying with me on the line; it's time to start reeling me into and through Part III.
Jay
Comment Written 22-Jan-2023
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2023
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Thanks so much, Jay.
Oh no, not a romance writer!
You've also given me two great suggestions for modifications. I agree with both. Thank you kindly.
Comment from royowen
This seems like an epilogue to me Jim, and a forerunner to what is coming up I'm sure, life is good it seems to me, for E.J. Kenny and Abby, and it seems like they are living that proverbial dream. Beautifully written, blessings Roy
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2023
This seems like an epilogue to me Jim, and a forerunner to what is coming up I'm sure, life is good it seems to me, for E.J. Kenny and Abby, and it seems like they are living that proverbial dream. Beautifully written, blessings Roy
Comment Written 22-Jan-2023
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2023
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Thanks, Roy. We shift gears in Part 3 and pick up the story a few years later.
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Well done Jim
Comment from Carol Hillebrenner
It seems to be a perfect end for Abby and Kenny as they marry. Now it is E. J.'s turn to shine and he does. Life is good for all of them. Now I wonder what is going to happen to them, or someone new? Well written and I didn't see any errors.
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2023
It seems to be a perfect end for Abby and Kenny as they marry. Now it is E. J.'s turn to shine and he does. Life is good for all of them. Now I wonder what is going to happen to them, or someone new? Well written and I didn't see any errors.
Comment Written 22-Jan-2023
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2023
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Thank you Carol. A new character (actually an old one) will make her appearance in Part 3. Stay tuned!
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Looking forward to it.
Comment from barbara.wilkey
So far, we have a very happy ending. What could go wrong one might ask? I have a feeling a lot could go wrong, and I can't wait to read part 3. I already know I am going to enjoy it. This post is very well written.
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2023
So far, we have a very happy ending. What could go wrong one might ask? I have a feeling a lot could go wrong, and I can't wait to read part 3. I already know I am going to enjoy it. This post is very well written.
Comment Written 22-Jan-2023
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2023
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Thank you so much, Barbara. I'll give you a little clue about Part 3: Dana Padgett, Abby's main antagonizer as a child, makes a reappearance.
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Can't wait.
Comment from Mama La
This has a lot of potential. When writing, use more sensory details. How did the snowball feel in Abby's hand? Was she nervous or giddy? Was her stomach churning or did she feel light-headed? The same with the wedding. Show how beautiful Abby looked by providing details about how her father and guests reacted to her in her stunning gown.
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2023
This has a lot of potential. When writing, use more sensory details. How did the snowball feel in Abby's hand? Was she nervous or giddy? Was her stomach churning or did she feel light-headed? The same with the wedding. Show how beautiful Abby looked by providing details about how her father and guests reacted to her in her stunning gown.
Comment Written 22-Jan-2023
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2023
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Thank you for your honest review. Your points are very well taken. Although the points you mention do not advance the story very much in the direction it will be heading, I can see how a few more details of the sort you mention will make it more appealing especially to women readers. I am looking for wider appeal than just a golfing audience, so I will definitely take your advice. Thank you very much.
Comment from Tom Horonzy
Perhaps I slept too long. I found this informative, grammatically sound and not quite as captivating as past chapters. Better things to come, I surmise in Part III. Good luck.
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2023
Perhaps I slept too long. I found this informative, grammatically sound and not quite as captivating as past chapters. Better things to come, I surmise in Part III. Good luck.
Comment Written 22-Jan-2023
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2023
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Yes, I agree. This was more of a wrap-up before we shift gears and get into a new part of the story where a lot happens.