Quiet Lawyer
Viewing comments for Chapter 42 "Quiet Lawyer Chapter 20 B"Can a broken heart be mended?
29 total reviews
Comment from Brett Matthew West
"wiped blood" should be he wiped blood.
Pictures a good way to bring back memories of fun times and people.
Seems Cord sometimes feels like Alexandra is above his social standing as their conversation about Yale indicates.
Cord better keep a watchful eye out for Alan. Sounds like he is not out of the scene yet.
reply by the author on 27-Oct-2022
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"wiped blood" should be he wiped blood.
Pictures a good way to bring back memories of fun times and people.
Seems Cord sometimes feels like Alexandra is above his social standing as their conversation about Yale indicates.
Cord better keep a watchful eye out for Alan. Sounds like he is not out of the scene yet.
Comment Written 27-Oct-2022
reply by the author on 27-Oct-2022
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Ali's status is one of the issues they need to work through as a couple. Alan will return and not in a good way. Thank you for the kind review. I've made the correction.
Comment from BethShelby
It sound like Alan isn't finished yet. He still making threats. It looks like Alex and Cord's romance has been turned up a notch. They still have a lot to decided how there relationship will work with her as a New York lawyer.
I'm loving your story.
reply by the author on 27-Oct-2022
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It sound like Alan isn't finished yet. He still making threats. It looks like Alex and Cord's romance has been turned up a notch. They still have a lot to decided how there relationship will work with her as a New York lawyer.
I'm loving your story.
Comment Written 27-Oct-2022
reply by the author on 27-Oct-2022
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Alan isn't finished yet. He will return and not in a goodway. Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Michaela Moore
This is the first chapter of this book that I have read. It is easy to see why it is so popular. I love that you take your time with each scene and with the dialogue. This makes it so much more realistic. I also love that you seem to give a lot of important history/backstory through dialogue as well. After all, this is the only way we actually know someone's story. In pieces as they reveal it to us through conversations. Excellent writing gift you have. I am proud to be connected to you on this cite.
reply by the author on 27-Oct-2022
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This is the first chapter of this book that I have read. It is easy to see why it is so popular. I love that you take your time with each scene and with the dialogue. This makes it so much more realistic. I also love that you seem to give a lot of important history/backstory through dialogue as well. After all, this is the only way we actually know someone's story. In pieces as they reveal it to us through conversations. Excellent writing gift you have. I am proud to be connected to you on this cite.
Comment Written 26-Oct-2022
reply by the author on 27-Oct-2022
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Thank you for the encouragement. I appreciat it.
Comment from Carol Hillebrenner
This is very well done and makes the reader aware of the potential for something bad to happen to one of them, something that is Alan's fault. I can't see Alan heading west, so it suggests a lot of possibilities about what he can do in New York. There has to be a reason he keeps insisting Ali is his.
reply by the author on 26-Oct-2022
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This is very well done and makes the reader aware of the potential for something bad to happen to one of them, something that is Alan's fault. I can't see Alan heading west, so it suggests a lot of possibilities about what he can do in New York. There has to be a reason he keeps insisting Ali is his.
Comment Written 25-Oct-2022
reply by the author on 26-Oct-2022
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Thank you for the kind review. I can promise Alan will strike again and it won't be good.
Comment from John Ciarmello
I had a feeling Alan would show up again. He seems to have more going on than his jealousy of Ali and his hate for Cord. He seems to be a bit mentally touched, which could make things more sticky. Great chapter! Best, JohnC
reply by the author on 25-Oct-2022
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I had a feeling Alan would show up again. He seems to have more going on than his jealousy of Ali and his hate for Cord. He seems to be a bit mentally touched, which could make things more sticky. Great chapter! Best, JohnC
Comment Written 25-Oct-2022
reply by the author on 25-Oct-2022
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We'll discover his real intent in a few posts, I promise.
Comment from estory
A great chapter. You had tons of tension in here, from the fight scene between Cord and Alan, to that tension between Cord and Alex, as they try to define their relationship. I loved that fight scene. Fists thrown, angry stares, and we get the idea it is not over. And then the dialogue between Cord and Alex was just full of emotion as they try to wriggle around these issues of his being protective and her being better off financially and better educated. We see him struggling with that, and her with him stepping in to fight her battles. Your bringing up all kinds of issues in relationships in this chapter. estory
reply by the author on 25-Oct-2022
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A great chapter. You had tons of tension in here, from the fight scene between Cord and Alan, to that tension between Cord and Alex, as they try to define their relationship. I loved that fight scene. Fists thrown, angry stares, and we get the idea it is not over. And then the dialogue between Cord and Alex was just full of emotion as they try to wriggle around these issues of his being protective and her being better off financially and better educated. We see him struggling with that, and her with him stepping in to fight her battles. Your bringing up all kinds of issues in relationships in this chapter. estory
Comment Written 25-Oct-2022
reply by the author on 25-Oct-2022
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Thank you for the encouragement.
Comment from CrystieCookie999
I definitely enjoyed reading this from beginning to end. The pacing of the plot is very good. I will look for sure for the next chapter. It sounded like Alan was controlling and manipulative. Thank you for sharing this one. There was a spot of dialogue I would add a comma and an article 'a', as such:
"I don't know if there's such a thing as a 'girl toy', but if there is(put a comma here after is) I could make these arguments. Before I came to the ranch, I knew nothing about ranch life, so I guess I'm ignorant. Since I'm living at the ranch free of charge, am I (add article 'a' here before kept) kept woman?"
reply by the author on 25-Oct-2022
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I definitely enjoyed reading this from beginning to end. The pacing of the plot is very good. I will look for sure for the next chapter. It sounded like Alan was controlling and manipulative. Thank you for sharing this one. There was a spot of dialogue I would add a comma and an article 'a', as such:
"I don't know if there's such a thing as a 'girl toy', but if there is(put a comma here after is) I could make these arguments. Before I came to the ranch, I knew nothing about ranch life, so I guess I'm ignorant. Since I'm living at the ranch free of charge, am I (add article 'a' here before kept) kept woman?"
Comment Written 25-Oct-2022
reply by the author on 25-Oct-2022
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Thank you for the catches. I appreciate it and have made the corrections.
Comment from Sanku
Anthony coming and putting a firm stop to the fight was a relief .Hope Alan would leave them alone .I enjoyed their introspection about 'toy boy' and Alex's question to Cord if by living in the ranch free of cost ould make her a kept woman... Good analytical thinking.
reply by the author on 25-Oct-2022
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Anthony coming and putting a firm stop to the fight was a relief .Hope Alan would leave them alone .I enjoyed their introspection about 'toy boy' and Alex's question to Cord if by living in the ranch free of cost ould make her a kept woman... Good analytical thinking.
Comment Written 25-Oct-2022
reply by the author on 25-Oct-2022
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Thank you for the encouragement. Alan will show up again.
Comment from irishauthorme
Hi, Barbara, I apologize for coming in late to read your story. I will go back and try to catch up.
You have created an interesting mix of characters here, and a great contrast between the city location and a Texas ranch.
The realistic fight scene really livened up the story, and the aftermath was just as good.
So Alexandra is rich, but Cordero's family must be pretty well off, owning that ranch.
Saw only one place, "am I (a) kept woman?"
Good work,
irish
reply by the author on 25-Oct-2022
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Hi, Barbara, I apologize for coming in late to read your story. I will go back and try to catch up.
You have created an interesting mix of characters here, and a great contrast between the city location and a Texas ranch.
The realistic fight scene really livened up the story, and the aftermath was just as good.
So Alexandra is rich, but Cordero's family must be pretty well off, owning that ranch.
Saw only one place, "am I (a) kept woman?"
Good work,
irish
Comment Written 24-Oct-2022
reply by the author on 25-Oct-2022
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I have made the correction. I have a bad habit of leaving out little words. LOL Cord's family is doing well.
Comment from Judy Lawless
It's time Alan is physically removed from this story. He sure doesn't know the meaning of "we're through"! It's too bad he put a damper on a wonderful few days in New York City. That was a beautiful story. Barbara.
reply by the author on 25-Oct-2022
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It's time Alan is physically removed from this story. He sure doesn't know the meaning of "we're through"! It's too bad he put a damper on a wonderful few days in New York City. That was a beautiful story. Barbara.
Comment Written 24-Oct-2022
reply by the author on 25-Oct-2022
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Thank you for the kind review. Alan will show up again and it won't be good.
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You're most welcome, Barbara. After his threat, I didn't figure Alan was going to quietly disappear. :)
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He won't and he's even more dangerous.
