Midnight Express
A train mystery.10 total reviews
Comment from Malcolm Rothery
This is my type of storytelling. You paint the picture, build up the tension and then hit us with an unexpected twist. Congrats on winning.
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2022
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This is my type of storytelling. You paint the picture, build up the tension and then hit us with an unexpected twist. Congrats on winning.
Comment Written 29-Oct-2022
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2022
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Thank you kind Sir!
Comment from Sanku
congratulations on your win. The short flash fiction is really brilliant .And from your own experience too. I liked the way you handled the theme and kept within the prescribed word limit.
reply by the author on 25-Oct-2022
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congratulations on your win. The short flash fiction is really brilliant .And from your own experience too. I liked the way you handled the theme and kept within the prescribed word limit.
Comment Written 25-Oct-2022
reply by the author on 25-Oct-2022
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Thank you! It was fun to write this.
Comment from Pam Lonsdale
What a terrific flash fiction - no wonder the review board awarded you first place, as they love twists and this short-short has that and good writing. You really said all you needed to in a few words, and that's what flash is all about.
Congratulations!
reply by the author on 23-Oct-2022
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What a terrific flash fiction - no wonder the review board awarded you first place, as they love twists and this short-short has that and good writing. You really said all you needed to in a few words, and that's what flash is all about.
Congratulations!
Comment Written 23-Oct-2022
reply by the author on 23-Oct-2022
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Thank you so much for your kind words. I appreciate it!
Comment from Brandon Clark
Very cool idea! The ending twist was perfect! Congrats on winning the contest!! One of my very, very, early works was a noir style mystery. I must have been about 6 years old and made it all the way through 2 entire pages which I cut to the approximate size of a book...lol. Mrs. Donnington was the "damsel in distress" and that is all I can remember. Great job and thanks for rekindling that memory...maybe I can revisit and actually write it now.
reply by the author on 23-Oct-2022
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Very cool idea! The ending twist was perfect! Congrats on winning the contest!! One of my very, very, early works was a noir style mystery. I must have been about 6 years old and made it all the way through 2 entire pages which I cut to the approximate size of a book...lol. Mrs. Donnington was the "damsel in distress" and that is all I can remember. Great job and thanks for rekindling that memory...maybe I can revisit and actually write it now.
Comment Written 23-Oct-2022
reply by the author on 23-Oct-2022
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Thank you for your kind review and stars! Your idea would make a great story. I appreciate you!
Comment from Ric Myworld
An eight-year-old detective would make for a fun and entertaining book or television show. That is if mom would leave him alone long enough to get something done. Thanks for sharing. And congratulations on your your contest winner!
reply by the author on 23-Oct-2022
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An eight-year-old detective would make for a fun and entertaining book or television show. That is if mom would leave him alone long enough to get something done. Thanks for sharing. And congratulations on your your contest winner!
Comment Written 23-Oct-2022
reply by the author on 23-Oct-2022
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Thanks! Not as worldly as the donkey show story but it got the job done. Have a great week!
Comment from dragonpoet
Hi Douglas,
This shows you how a book can become your world for the time you are reading it. The 'real' world dissolves when you are rapt in your book. I like the way you left us off at a cliffhanger.
Keep writing and stay healthy.
Congrats on winning the contest.
Joan
reply by the author on 23-Oct-2022
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Hi Douglas,
This shows you how a book can become your world for the time you are reading it. The 'real' world dissolves when you are rapt in your book. I like the way you left us off at a cliffhanger.
Keep writing and stay healthy.
Congrats on winning the contest.
Joan
Comment Written 23-Oct-2022
reply by the author on 23-Oct-2022
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Thank you ma?am!
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You're welcome, sir.
Joan
Comment from Contests
reply by the author on 23-Oct-2022
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 A contest winning entry! A seven star rating from the Contest Committee for posting the winning contest entry. |
Comment Written 23-Oct-2022
reply by the author on 23-Oct-2022
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Oh my gosh! Thank you so much! I loved writing this cute little story! I appreciate you guys so much!
Comment from Susan Newell
Douglas,
This is cute. I liked "eight-year-old Detective Dougie" and especially The Knuckle. You would qualify for a word I coined for myself--sleuthistic. See note below.
Sue
the main hall of the train -- I looked it up. On a train a passageway is called a corridor.
Sincerely,
Your flying ace friend.
reply by the author on 16-Oct-2022
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Douglas,
This is cute. I liked "eight-year-old Detective Dougie" and especially The Knuckle. You would qualify for a word I coined for myself--sleuthistic. See note below.
Sue
the main hall of the train -- I looked it up. On a train a passageway is called a corridor.
Sincerely,
Your flying ace friend.
Comment Written 16-Oct-2022
reply by the author on 16-Oct-2022
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I can always count on you to nudge me in the right direction!
Thank you.
PS I can still remember how excited I was finding that fingerprint on the wall. It was such a thrill, like I had discovered the moon. Too funny!
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😁
Comment from Michael Ludwinder
I loved it. Your final paragraph put a big smile on my face. I love how you brought us into the imagination of an eight year old. This was creative - tricked me until the final paragraph - and was a fun read. Great job with the flash fiction format!
reply by the author on 16-Oct-2022
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I loved it. Your final paragraph put a big smile on my face. I love how you brought us into the imagination of an eight year old. This was creative - tricked me until the final paragraph - and was a fun read. Great job with the flash fiction format!
Comment Written 16-Oct-2022
reply by the author on 16-Oct-2022
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Thank you Sir! Not sure why, but I like the Flash Fiction format. Maybe because it is such a challenge.
Comment from Bill Schott
This story, Midnight Express to Chi Town, finds Detective Dougie on the trail of the saboteur. Fortunately, for the bad guys, Mama Goff was strict on bedtime.
reply by the author on 16-Oct-2022
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This story, Midnight Express to Chi Town, finds Detective Dougie on the trail of the saboteur. Fortunately, for the bad guys, Mama Goff was strict on bedtime.
Comment Written 16-Oct-2022
reply by the author on 16-Oct-2022
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Many a momma have foiled the imaginary capers of the youth!
