Reviews from

The Chronicals Of Bethica: The Rise

Viewing comments for Chapter 32 "The Chronicles of Bethica"
Abram must defeat a deadly humanoid race of beings

13 total reviews 
Comment from Brett Matthew West
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Just like children always getting into mischief then crying for someone to get them out.

Seems he received quite an ultimatim, either deliver the goods or become them.

Not a good idea to lie to his momma, that could come back to nip him in the bud before it is all over.

 Comment Written 16-Nov-2022


reply by the author on 16-Nov-2022
    Thank you for this fine review. I really appreciate you.
Comment from Katherine M. (k-11)
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Another excellent, well-written chapter, where it seems that the two sides are building up their forces for battle. A lot is at stake for both, the consequences of failure being massive. Looking forwards to part 2. Kate xx

 Comment Written 01-Sep-2022


reply by the author on 01-Sep-2022
    Thank you so much, Kate. Blessings, my dear.
Comment from Judy Lawless
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

This is an excellent ending to part one, Amahra. I was thinking the trouble was coming to the end, but apparently not. You've left us wondering what the next part will hold. Well done.

 Comment Written 31-Aug-2022


reply by the author on 01-Sep-2022
    Thank you, Judy. I'm so glad you enjoyed this chapter. Things are heating up.
reply by Judy Lawless on 01-Sep-2022
    You're most welcome, Amahra.
Comment from Liz Westfall
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

I have never read anything like this. It's giving me Game of Thrones vibes but with "The Vampire Diaries" nuances. I don't know if that makes any sense! Be it that I hadn't read previous parts of this, it was still easy to pick up on the plot. Nicely done!

 Comment Written 30-Aug-2022


reply by the author on 30-Aug-2022
    Thank you so much, Liz. I appreciate you stopping by.
Comment from Jay Squires
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

I'm embarrassed to review this, Amahra, with no six in my hand. I had read a slew of fine posts Saturday and Sunday, and gave away my sixes, but none was greater than this one. In fact, I have a confession to make. I am (at my son's insistence) reading The Hobbit and despite Tolkien's marvelous imagery, I would take your characters over his elves and dwarves any day in terms of adventure and rich description. You have a rare gift, Amahra. I hope you pursue publication for this series.

JS

 Comment Written 29-Aug-2022


reply by the author on 30-Aug-2022
    Thank you, Jay. I'm always the better for having you review my work. Thank you for the stars. No apologies needed. My characters better than Tolkien's? I WISH! LOL!
Comment from Ric Myworld
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

It was your fantastic descriptions that first drew me into your story, and nothing has changed since, every chapter lets me envision and experience with all my senses. It's always a pleasure! Thanks for sharing.

 Comment Written 29-Aug-2022


reply by the author on 29-Aug-2022
    Thank you, Ric, so glad you are still sticking with this story. I know it's not your genre, that's why I appreciate you so much. Blessings my friend.
Comment from GARY MACLEAN
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

This must have taekn a great deal of planning and organization, what with so many different characters, Gods and races.

At Chapter 19:
Para 4, 1st sentence: Add comma after (Oh) Use a comma after an introductory word or phrase.
Para 37, 3rd sentence: Change (was) to (were) Use were with expressions that are hypothetical, wishful, imagined, desired, doubtful, and otherwise contrary to fact, (no longer alone in his skin)

At Minor Characters:
Captain Dulcey of the (Cristofur) then at Judian commander of the (Christofur) Christofur spelled two different ways.

I really liked how you broke the "foreign" names out into how they should be stated. It helped a lot with the read.
Great story, anxiously awaiting the next installment.

 Comment Written 29-Aug-2022


reply by the author on 29-Aug-2022
    Thank you, Gary, really appreciate the help. I'll make the changes as soon as I finish feeding my face. LOL! Blessings. I appreciate all the stars.
reply by GARY MACLEAN on 29-Aug-2022
    Get that face fed first, I don't blame you. Changes can always get done; food mysteriously disappears if you are not on your full guard. (I have grandkids around)
Comment from barbara.wilkey
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Thank you for sharing this addition to this great novel with us. Mothers can be tricky to deal with. LOL I enjoyed reading.

"Granted! he said boomingly. (missing ending quotation marks after '"Granted!'")

Now, Father..." (missing beginning quotation marks)

 Comment Written 29-Aug-2022


reply by the author on 29-Aug-2022
    Thank you, Barbara. I made the corrections. Yes, Brehira can be unpredictable.
Comment from Shirley McLain
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Another excellent chapter that I did enjoy reading. You did a great job, and I didn't find any errors. I am happy Dinary made it back to his parents, but I am afraid this war will not be as easy as they think. Have a blessed day. Shirley

 Comment Written 29-Aug-2022


reply by the author on 29-Aug-2022
    Thank you, Shirley. Blessings.
Comment from Carlos' girl
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

This writing is flawless and very entertaining. It is easy to read and holds the reader's attention. I appreciate the work that this took. Very enjoyable.

 Comment Written 29-Aug-2022


reply by the author on 29-Aug-2022
    Thank you so much for stopping by, reading, and reviewing my work. I'm glad you liked the writing. Blessings.
reply by Carlos' girl on 29-Aug-2022
    Very welcome amahra