Quiet Lawyer
Viewing comments for Chapter 24 "Quiet Lawyer Chapter 13A"Can a broken heart be mended?
27 total reviews
Comment from eliz100
This is another excellent chapter. I especially like the hook at the end. It makes me want to keep reading. I do not see any room for improvement.
I was intrigued by the picture in the beginning but now I understand.
reply by the author on 23-Jun-2022
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This is another excellent chapter. I especially like the hook at the end. It makes me want to keep reading. I do not see any room for improvement.
I was intrigued by the picture in the beginning but now I understand.
Comment Written 23-Jun-2022
reply by the author on 23-Jun-2022
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Thank you for the kind review. I'm sorry you had to read it with no money attached.
Comment from Rosemary Everson1
What an ending. It leaves us hanging. The plot at the end is exciting yet sad. When it comes to violence it is never a good thing. But as a writer, I know you need some kind of questionable plot to make the chapter exciting and mysterious.
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2022
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What an ending. It leaves us hanging. The plot at the end is exciting yet sad. When it comes to violence it is never a good thing. But as a writer, I know you need some kind of questionable plot to make the chapter exciting and mysterious.
Comment Written 22-Jun-2022
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2022
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Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Sanku
Cordero's worry over Ali's safety was well justified. I hope she would soon get someone to help her .Your story is moving very smoothly and I am enjoying reading it ...Waiting for the next
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2022
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Cordero's worry over Ali's safety was well justified. I hope she would soon get someone to help her .Your story is moving very smoothly and I am enjoying reading it ...Waiting for the next
Comment Written 22-Jun-2022
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2022
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Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Iza Deleanu
Oh, no poor Ali, now kidnaped in a city that is not hers. Probably Cordero is going to kill who ever dared to touch Ali. Thank you for sharing and good luck with the next chapter,
reply by the author on 21-Jun-2022
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Oh, no poor Ali, now kidnaped in a city that is not hers. Probably Cordero is going to kill who ever dared to touch Ali. Thank you for sharing and good luck with the next chapter,
Comment Written 21-Jun-2022
reply by the author on 21-Jun-2022
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Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Fleedleflump
Dramatic ending! Especially effective coming after the errands around town, lulling us into a sense of calm and routine. I'm looking forward to the next chapter :-)
Mike
Spag notes:
'Standing Rosa said, "Breakfast is finished.' - needs a comma after 'Standing'
'This late Rogers won't find out about it until at least Wednesday.' - I'd be inclined to put a comma after 'late'
reply by the author on 21-Jun-2022
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Dramatic ending! Especially effective coming after the errands around town, lulling us into a sense of calm and routine. I'm looking forward to the next chapter :-)
Mike
Spag notes:
'Standing Rosa said, "Breakfast is finished.' - needs a comma after 'Standing'
'This late Rogers won't find out about it until at least Wednesday.' - I'd be inclined to put a comma after 'late'
Comment Written 21-Jun-2022
reply by the author on 21-Jun-2022
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Thank you for the help. I appreciate your input.
Comment from dmt1967
Once outside, Jewel came over to the edge of the corral for (her pets.) This sounds like she is getting a pet or pets of her own. (some affection.)
"Ali, I was thinking about working on (the) bit and bridle (with Jewel) late this afternoon. (Jewels') (delete) Otherwise it sounds like Jewel is a person helping you.
Nice chapter and thank you for sharing. Have a great week.
reply by the author on 21-Jun-2022
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Once outside, Jewel came over to the edge of the corral for (her pets.) This sounds like she is getting a pet or pets of her own. (some affection.)
"Ali, I was thinking about working on (the) bit and bridle (with Jewel) late this afternoon. (Jewels') (delete) Otherwise it sounds like Jewel is a person helping you.
Nice chapter and thank you for sharing. Have a great week.
Comment Written 21-Jun-2022
reply by the author on 21-Jun-2022
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I see what you're staying. I have made the corrections. Thank you for the help.
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
A nice easy going chat around the breakfast table, with Cord coming in and embarrassing Ali again. Life is always happening on a farm, and now with another foal coming, Cord will be busy again. Now Ali has got another problem. I'm wondering if it's her ex. I'm sure he will be coming back into her life to make more trouble. Well done, Barb, an excellent cliff-hanger. :)) Sandra xxx
reply by the author on 21-Jun-2022
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A nice easy going chat around the breakfast table, with Cord coming in and embarrassing Ali again. Life is always happening on a farm, and now with another foal coming, Cord will be busy again. Now Ali has got another problem. I'm wondering if it's her ex. I'm sure he will be coming back into her life to make more trouble. Well done, Barb, an excellent cliff-hanger. :)) Sandra xxx
Comment Written 21-Jun-2022
reply by the author on 21-Jun-2022
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It's not her ex, yet. He will be causing trouble, though. Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from John Ciarmello
Oh, no! This can't be good. Well, she ended up in plenty of trouble anyway. Nice cliffhanger, I'm hoping for nothing wrong to happen to Ali, but it doesn't look good. Great Chapter!
reply by the author on 21-Jun-2022
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Oh, no! This can't be good. Well, she ended up in plenty of trouble anyway. Nice cliffhanger, I'm hoping for nothing wrong to happen to Ali, but it doesn't look good. Great Chapter!
Comment Written 20-Jun-2022
reply by the author on 21-Jun-2022
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Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Ulla
Oh, dear, Barbara, this is getting a bit out of hand, what on earth is going to happen next.
I don't know how I missed this posting, but I did. And now I have no more sixes left. I am so sorry, because it deserves one. Ulla xxx
reply by the author on 21-Jun-2022
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Oh, dear, Barbara, this is getting a bit out of hand, what on earth is going to happen next.
I don't know how I missed this posting, but I did. And now I have no more sixes left. I am so sorry, because it deserves one. Ulla xxx
Comment Written 20-Jun-2022
reply by the author on 21-Jun-2022
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Don't worry about the sixes. I appreciate the support.
Comment from estory
You really set up this tense, suspenseful scene at the end pretty well, in all the small talk around the kitchen table we didn't see this coming at all. It just bursts in around the corner, much as these moments happen in real life. You have a real gift in using this small talk to frame out relationships between characters and display the hidden emotions going on underneath everything. estory
reply by the author on 21-Jun-2022
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You really set up this tense, suspenseful scene at the end pretty well, in all the small talk around the kitchen table we didn't see this coming at all. It just bursts in around the corner, much as these moments happen in real life. You have a real gift in using this small talk to frame out relationships between characters and display the hidden emotions going on underneath everything. estory
Comment Written 20-Jun-2022
reply by the author on 21-Jun-2022
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Thank you for the kind review.
