Quiet Lawyer
Viewing comments for Chapter 13 "Quiet Lawyer Chapter 8"Can a broken heart be mended?
24 total reviews
Comment from Sanku
So Pat won't be that horrible? It is welcome since I l prefer 'nice' characters.
The slow blooming of romance is absolutely cute. I liked the dialogue between the parents and the son.
reply by the author on 12-Apr-2022
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So Pat won't be that horrible? It is welcome since I l prefer 'nice' characters.
The slow blooming of romance is absolutely cute. I liked the dialogue between the parents and the son.
Comment Written 12-Apr-2022
reply by the author on 12-Apr-2022
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Pat is horrible as you will see pretty soon. Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Begin Again
Good day, Barbara!
Sorry, I've been away and not read your latest chapters, but I was thrilled with it as always. I like the slow-paced courting between Ali and Cord, getting to know each other, and second guessing... real-life stuff. Well done, of course.
Hugs, Carol
reply by the author on 06-Apr-2022
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Good day, Barbara!
Sorry, I've been away and not read your latest chapters, but I was thrilled with it as always. I like the slow-paced courting between Ali and Cord, getting to know each other, and second guessing... real-life stuff. Well done, of course.
Hugs, Carol
Comment Written 06-Apr-2022
reply by the author on 06-Apr-2022
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Yes, it is real life. Thank you for the kind review and I continue to pray for you and your family.
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Thank you, Barbara. It's been a rough go of late, but I finally forced myself to turn the computer on. Didn't want to miss your stories.
Hugs... and thank you for the prayers.
Comment from amahra
After reading and enjoying the first story, I find it kind of hard to recognize the villains in this one. I've got the good guys pegged. But I'll stick with this until things unfold. Good dialogue, though.
reply by the author on 05-Apr-2022
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After reading and enjoying the first story, I find it kind of hard to recognize the villains in this one. I've got the good guys pegged. But I'll stick with this until things unfold. Good dialogue, though.
Comment Written 05-Apr-2022
reply by the author on 05-Apr-2022
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The two of the villains have been introduced, briefly, Pat and Ali's ex-fiance, Alan. More on them will be coming. Thank you for the kind revie.
Comment from RPSaxena
Hello Barbara.Wilkey,
The story is moving ahead smoothly and particularly since 'kissing point and at the same time lion's roaring' episode onwards up to the end, it flows in a very interesting way.
reply by the author on 05-Apr-2022
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Hello Barbara.Wilkey,
The story is moving ahead smoothly and particularly since 'kissing point and at the same time lion's roaring' episode onwards up to the end, it flows in a very interesting way.
Comment Written 05-Apr-2022
reply by the author on 05-Apr-2022
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Thank you for the kind review.
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Most Welcome!
With best wishes,
~ RP
Comment from Ben Colder
I must be honest; I am having a hard time accepting this one for some reason. Still washing away from my mind your last story, but I will get there. Your writing will always taper my mind into receiving a good story.
reply by the author on 05-Apr-2022
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I must be honest; I am having a hard time accepting this one for some reason. Still washing away from my mind your last story, but I will get there. Your writing will always taper my mind into receiving a good story.
Comment Written 05-Apr-2022
reply by the author on 05-Apr-2022
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Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from F. William Lester
I like the story. I feel a bit like an interloper dropping into the middle of it, but I think I've got the gist. One thought occurred to me as I read it, it needs more description.
For example, they ride out after dinner to see his favorite star-gazing spot, but did they leave at sunset or was it already dark? At sunset? How did the sunset look? Dark? How did the sky look? No stars or billions of tiny, dancing fireflies? Did the sweet smell of alfalpha fill the air or did their nostrils cake with the dust of the dry West Texas landscape? When he took off his shirt, did he have muscles, or did he have MUSCLES? Was there a moon? Was it the sheen of his skin or the silhouette of his muscles in the moonlight that caught her attention? When he took her hand, did her stomach tense? Did her breath catch in her throat? Did her head spin? Was his touch warm? Cold? Clammy? Was it more of a caress? Use the five senses in your scenes. Let the reader experience what your characters are feeling and thinking.
I apologize for rambling, but I often get critiqued for doing the same thing. A little polishing and you'll have a great chapter. Thanks for sharing it. Good luck. Good writing and stay well.
reply by the author on 05-Apr-2022
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I like the story. I feel a bit like an interloper dropping into the middle of it, but I think I've got the gist. One thought occurred to me as I read it, it needs more description.
For example, they ride out after dinner to see his favorite star-gazing spot, but did they leave at sunset or was it already dark? At sunset? How did the sunset look? Dark? How did the sky look? No stars or billions of tiny, dancing fireflies? Did the sweet smell of alfalpha fill the air or did their nostrils cake with the dust of the dry West Texas landscape? When he took off his shirt, did he have muscles, or did he have MUSCLES? Was there a moon? Was it the sheen of his skin or the silhouette of his muscles in the moonlight that caught her attention? When he took her hand, did her stomach tense? Did her breath catch in her throat? Did her head spin? Was his touch warm? Cold? Clammy? Was it more of a caress? Use the five senses in your scenes. Let the reader experience what your characters are feeling and thinking.
I apologize for rambling, but I often get critiqued for doing the same thing. A little polishing and you'll have a great chapter. Thanks for sharing it. Good luck. Good writing and stay well.
Comment Written 04-Apr-2022
reply by the author on 05-Apr-2022
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I don't like reading a lot of descriptions unless it's necessary to the story. I like to use my own imagination. When the author uses a lot of description, I actually skip reading it and go on the parts that actually count. So I don't write it, unless it's actually part of the story. Thank you for the kind review. I am know for being a crisp writer. I don't do a lot of extra words.
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You're welcome. I'm sorry I couldn't be more helpful. Stay well.
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Not a problem. I do read and consider all reviews. I do like the idea of the breath catch in her throat. Not for this post because Ali is rebounding from a horrible relationship, but you wouldn't know that because you're new to the novel, but I can see where it will fit in very soon. LOL
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Thank you and good luck with your book. Stay well
Comment from John Ciarmello
Another great chapter. I hope there're actual people out there like Cordero. He is such a well-developed character as is Ali. The storyline is addicting, and the hangers pull you in for the next chapter. Thank you for the read, Barbera.
reply by the author on 05-Apr-2022
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Another great chapter. I hope there're actual people out there like Cordero. He is such a well-developed character as is Ali. The storyline is addicting, and the hangers pull you in for the next chapter. Thank you for the read, Barbera.
Comment Written 04-Apr-2022
reply by the author on 05-Apr-2022
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Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Rosemary Everson1
What happened to the cougar after they went back to the barn? The cougar did not follow them? Alexandra reminds me of a horse whisperer. She has a way with Jewel.
reply by the author on 05-Apr-2022
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What happened to the cougar after they went back to the barn? The cougar did not follow them? Alexandra reminds me of a horse whisperer. She has a way with Jewel.
Comment Written 04-Apr-2022
reply by the author on 05-Apr-2022
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Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from eliz100
This is a great chapter. It moves the story along nicely. I do enjoy the emotional tension between Cord and Ali. I do not see any room for improvement. I look forward to the next chapter.
reply by the author on 05-Apr-2022
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This is a great chapter. It moves the story along nicely. I do enjoy the emotional tension between Cord and Ali. I do not see any room for improvement. I look forward to the next chapter.
Comment Written 04-Apr-2022
reply by the author on 05-Apr-2022
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Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Olivanne Marsh
Hi, I am picking this up in the middle, so I should be a bit confused, but thanks to your linear story and clear writing, I am not having a problem figuring it out. The dialogue is good, flows well and seems natural. I thought the chapter lacked descriptions of the settings, the characters (clothing, eye color, etc.) which adds depth and richness to the story. I think you've done a great job is creating realistic characters and situations. I enjoyed reading this.
reply by the author on 04-Apr-2022
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Hi, I am picking this up in the middle, so I should be a bit confused, but thanks to your linear story and clear writing, I am not having a problem figuring it out. The dialogue is good, flows well and seems natural. I thought the chapter lacked descriptions of the settings, the characters (clothing, eye color, etc.) which adds depth and richness to the story. I think you've done a great job is creating realistic characters and situations. I enjoyed reading this.
Comment Written 04-Apr-2022
reply by the author on 04-Apr-2022
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I don't like reading those descriptions. When I story has them, I actually skip them and start after they've finished. I believe the take the reader out of the story. Each person has their own opinions. That's why there's so many different types of authors. Thank you for the kind review.
