The Locked Room
a 250-word haunted horror story.13 total reviews
Comment from Rosemary Everson1
You definitely wrote a horror story. If a person sat in a chair for an amount of time, the flesh would turn to obscene matter. If they had to get rid of the scariness within this story, they were smoked.
reply by the author on 02-Oct-2021
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You definitely wrote a horror story. If a person sat in a chair for an amount of time, the flesh would turn to obscene matter. If they had to get rid of the scariness within this story, they were smoked.
Comment Written 02-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 02-Oct-2021
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Thank you, Rosemary, for the positive review.
Comment from Eternal Muse
Oh, this was horrifically graphic. Like in a Hitchcock movie. Kept me glued to my chair. That Neil guy was the culprit, it turned our, burning the house and the people in it. The part about his grandmother was thrilling - you have quite a talent.
Best of luck in the contest - it should do very well.
reply by the author on 02-Oct-2021
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Oh, this was horrifically graphic. Like in a Hitchcock movie. Kept me glued to my chair. That Neil guy was the culprit, it turned our, burning the house and the people in it. The part about his grandmother was thrilling - you have quite a talent.
Best of luck in the contest - it should do very well.
Comment Written 02-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 02-Oct-2021
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Thank you, EM
Comment from DeboraDyess
Oh... Oh, my gosh!
I wasn't expecting that at all. You got me. I actually thought when you said, "burn down the house like I did" that it was a to and you meant that Bea and Virgil burned the house down but NO!
I like this very much.
I'm going to invite you to submit it to a horror anthology that I'm publishing independently for FS and other writers. Details are in my portfolio in the post entitled 'Every Dark Thing'.
If you're interested after you read the post, PM me. :)
Great job!
Blessings,
Deb
reply by the author on 01-Oct-2021
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Oh... Oh, my gosh!
I wasn't expecting that at all. You got me. I actually thought when you said, "burn down the house like I did" that it was a to and you meant that Bea and Virgil burned the house down but NO!
I like this very much.
I'm going to invite you to submit it to a horror anthology that I'm publishing independently for FS and other writers. Details are in my portfolio in the post entitled 'Every Dark Thing'.
If you're interested after you read the post, PM me. :)
Great job!
Blessings,
Deb
Comment Written 01-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 01-Oct-2021
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This is a blind contest so I will need to wait for it to be over I think. I am very interested though.
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
A scary write and I am glad it is just fantasy here as the thought of rotting bodies and ghosts would stop me from sleeping! He he he, good luck with the contest, love Dolly x
reply by the author on 01-Oct-2021
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A scary write and I am glad it is just fantasy here as the thought of rotting bodies and ghosts would stop me from sleeping! He he he, good luck with the contest, love Dolly x
Comment Written 01-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 01-Oct-2021
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Thanks, Dolly
Comment from Patty Palmer
An interesting story. It reminded me of the movie, Psycho where he left his mother in her bed for years after she died. That was one spooky movie. Good luck with the contest.
Patty
reply by the author on 01-Oct-2021
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An interesting story. It reminded me of the movie, Psycho where he left his mother in her bed for years after she died. That was one spooky movie. Good luck with the contest.
Patty
Comment Written 01-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 01-Oct-2021
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Thank you, Patty
Comment from oliver818
This is a fun story, perfect for Halloween and a great entry for this competition. It's gruesome and creepy and has a nice twist. Best of luck with the competition!s
reply by the author on 01-Oct-2021
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This is a fun story, perfect for Halloween and a great entry for this competition. It's gruesome and creepy and has a nice twist. Best of luck with the competition!s
Comment Written 01-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 01-Oct-2021
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Thank you, Oliver.
Comment from Mary Kay Bonfante
You certainly have this place haunted by Neil, and the rotting, reanimated corpse of Grandma Nell is a horror. It's not clear to me whether Neil burned the first house down when his parents were still alive, or had they already died?
It looks like he's burning down a second house, with his aunt and uncle in it, although how he does it as a ghost, I am not sure.
You have haunting, horror and some unanswered questions!
reply by the author on 01-Oct-2021
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You certainly have this place haunted by Neil, and the rotting, reanimated corpse of Grandma Nell is a horror. It's not clear to me whether Neil burned the first house down when his parents were still alive, or had they already died?
It looks like he's burning down a second house, with his aunt and uncle in it, although how he does it as a ghost, I am not sure.
You have haunting, horror and some unanswered questions!
Comment Written 01-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 01-Oct-2021
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Hi, Mary. I read that sentence you questioned again and found no error. Your addition of the verb is okay, but, in my view, not necessary. Yes, the untold story element of his parents? death would be similar to grandma?s immolation for the same reason.
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You may be right. I will adjust my review. Blessings, Mary Kay
Comment from Wendy G
Well you certainly met the brief of writing a horror story! It is very gruesome - just as you intended. I don't like your story (!) but it is well written. Lol.
Wendy
reply by the author on 24-Sep-2021
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Well you certainly met the brief of writing a horror story! It is very gruesome - just as you intended. I don't like your story (!) but it is well written. Lol.
Wendy
Comment Written 24-Sep-2021
reply by the author on 24-Sep-2021
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Thanks, Wendy, for giving this a look.
Comment from Mary Shifman
The creep factor is present with this story. I think that among the undead, zombies are the most ghastly. You've covered a lot of territory in you 250 words. I always told my students that a compete story had to have a beginning, middle and end, and you've got it. Well done. Good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2021
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The creep factor is present with this story. I think that among the undead, zombies are the most ghastly. You've covered a lot of territory in you 250 words. I always told my students that a compete story had to have a beginning, middle and end, and you've got it. Well done. Good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 23-Sep-2021
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2021
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Thanks, Mary
Comment from NANCY V. FORREST
What a nicely crafted horror story. And a generously twisted twist at the end. Nice that it is told through Neil's experiece and choice. Thoe locks photo is a nice touch.
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2021
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What a nicely crafted horror story. And a generously twisted twist at the end. Nice that it is told through Neil's experiece and choice. Thoe locks photo is a nice touch.
Comment Written 23-Sep-2021
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2021
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Thank you, Nancy
:-)
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