Reviews from

The Chronicals Of Bethica: The Rise

Viewing comments for Chapter 8 "The Chronicles Of Bethica"
Abram must defeat a deadly humanoid race of beings

9 total reviews 
Comment from Ric Myworld
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Wow, some mighty fancy descriptive writing that I won't soon forget. As a matter of face, I might have to go back and read this chapter again, something that I seldom to almost never do. Thanks for sharing.

 Comment Written 13-Jul-2021


reply by the author on 13-Jul-2021
    Yeah, Fantasy has to be action-packed. That's the fun in writing them. Thank you.
Comment from justafan
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Other than the first in this series, this is my favorite so far! Brilliant
So many heroes and heroines showing up! I read your work so fast ...I have to go back and read again and again.
I hate waiting!! Lol

Really well done, my friend!
Always
Justafan of yours
Missy

 Comment Written 26-Jun-2021


reply by the author on 26-Jun-2021
    Thank you so much, my dear. I'm glad you enjoyed the chapter. I really appreciate you and so many stars.
Comment from lancellot
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Thrilling battle with the undead upon the high seas. Excellent work. I'm glad you took your time building up the suspense before the battle took place. That they survived was a miracle. I'm surprised they made it.

Good work.

 Comment Written 22-Jun-2021


reply by the author on 22-Jun-2021
    Thank you. I'm so happy you liked the scenes. I appreciate you very much.
Comment from Judy Lawless
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

You've done an amazing job with this chapter, Amahra. I have to admit that this kind of fantasy isn't something I enjoy reading, but your imagery, action scenes and emotions expressed are almost believable!

 Comment Written 21-Jun-2021


reply by the author on 21-Jun-2021
    Thank you very much.
Comment from barbara.wilkey
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

I started to read this last night but was too tired and knew I wasn't giving it justice. I am glad I read it with fresh eyes it was well worth it. WOW! you did a fabulous job writing this. The descriptions and the emotions shone through.

Celio and several men bravely walked up and stood next to him, but Dinary ordered them back. (stood beside him, it has to do with definition.)

 Comment Written 21-Jun-2021


reply by the author on 21-Jun-2021
    Thank you very much, Barbara.
Comment from Jay Squires
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

You are the master of suspense and adventure, Amahra. This is stunning writing.

Here are some notes I made as I read:

with other unexplainable events he'd witness at sea over the years. [ ... events he'd WITNESSED at sea ...] I'm sure someone has pointed this out to you by now. I downloaded it early this morning and am just now getting to it (9 PM CA time)]

As the wings flapped, it made both ships rock from side to side. [You've probably pondered over this yourself, but as I see it, it was the flapping of the wings that made the ships rock side to side; therefore shouldn't "it" be changed to "they"?]

looking down upon the men with both swords out to its side [... it should read, either "out to its sides" or "out to either side"]

The fallen men's blood ran along the floorboards like scattered scarlet ribbons. [WOW! What an image!]


 Comment Written 21-Jun-2021


reply by the author on 21-Jun-2021
    Thanks, Jay. I'll revisit what you noted. I appreciate your review and notations.
Comment from Theodore McDowell
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Wow. I wish I had a six for this. I'm stepping into the middle of this tale and it immediately grasped my attention and wouldn't let go. the action was intense and fast paced with many interesting twists. I loved it.

 Comment Written 20-Jun-2021


reply by the author on 20-Jun-2021
    Thank you so much. I really appreciate you. I'm glad you enjoyed it.
Comment from forestport12
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

The carved creature opened its demonic mouth and sucked air into its wooden body. The loud cracking of the wood when it turned its head towards the men sent chills up their spines. Its eyes were the only things not made of wood; they were flesh, black and bulging. So much about your chapter was worthy to note. I just pulled this paragraph out as one of my favorites. What a powerful description. I could just see the fear in their eyes. It put me in there with them. And so many great power verbs, ones that carry a story. Wow. I should pay more attention to your project. Stan aka. Forestport

 Comment Written 20-Jun-2021


reply by the author on 20-Jun-2021
    Thank you, Stan so much. I'm glad you took the time to read and enjoyed it. And I'm flattered for so many stars. I appreciate you.
Comment from royowen
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

A beautifully described and written episode, just loved the battle imagery you projected in this excellent episode of something akin to the legend of the Flying Dutchman doomed to sail the ocean for eternity. And excellent episode Amahra. Well done, blessings Roy
Typo : The men gasped at Dinary('s) sudden strength,

 Comment Written 20-Jun-2021


reply by the author on 20-Jun-2021
    Thank you, Roy. Always a pleasure to read your review. And I made that correction.
reply by royowen on 20-Jun-2021
    Well done