Comment from Melodie Michelle

Good

The poem was a good try however there are some places it is clunky, if you read through it you will know of which parts I'm speaking bc it doesn't flow well from the tongue.

Thanxxx for sharing and may God bless you and your family;-)

 Comment Written 30-Jan-2021

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reply by the author on 30-Jan-2021

Thank you for your time to read, rate, and review this entry.
The rhythm and flow is meant to be off beat to the spoken tongue the capitalized words are an off beat emphasis as part of the off beat envisioned accompanying music. Thank you.

reply by Melodie Michelle on 30-Jan-2021

I wasn't speaking of the capitalization or lack thereof, just saying it is very clunky and doesn't flow at all well as your reading it! I don't know why some would actually want that in a piece, but I guess to each his own;-)
God bless;-)

reply by the author on 30-Jan-2021

Thanks. I'm a bit of an odd ball.

reply by Melodie Michelle on 31-Jan-2021

Smh

Comment from Dolly'sPoems

Excellent

This sounds like the road to hell as cocaine takes the user to another world where they live a fantasy until they are returned to reality, your flippant words gave this journey a black comedy feel to it, love Dolly x

 Comment Written 30-Jan-2021

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reply by the author on 30-Jan-2021

Thank you for your Continued Support. I wasn't sure if the topic would qualify as it is dark, but I'm also gathering other similar poems like it for publication in the coming months. Blessings.