Reviews from

Everyday can be a Happy Day

Every day is a happy day if you look at the bright side .

18 total reviews 
Comment from Iza Deleanu
Excellent
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Your story is quite funny and your last paragraph is priceless:"" You can go to the conference trip tomorrow. There will not be any fight between our two mothers. They can each carry one home."

Thank you for sharing and good luck with the contest.

 Comment Written 30-Nov-2020


reply by the author on 30-Nov-2020
    Thank you for your review.

    I like the ending too. But I love my twins.
Comment from mermaids
Excellent
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I enjoyed reading your story and the birth of twin girls is a joyous occasion. This is a happy story that brings a smile to the reader. Best wishes for the contest. I like how each grandmother had a baby to attend to.

 Comment Written 29-Nov-2020


reply by the author on 29-Nov-2020
    Thank you for your review.
Comment from Susan X Smith
Excellent
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This is a cheerful and heartwarming story and a good response to the writing prompt. There was a bit of suspense at the end, which added to the story. Thanks for sharing.

 Comment Written 29-Nov-2020


reply by the author on 29-Nov-2020
    Glad you like the story
Comment from robyn corum
Excellent
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Dear Mystery Dad,

How amazing! When I was pregnant with my third child, I had hoped that she might be twins - no reason, I just thought twins would be amazing. *smile*

But God knows best. Thanks - and good luck!

 Comment Written 29-Nov-2020


reply by the author on 29-Nov-2020
    thank you for your review. Twins girls are easier to bring up. Twin boys fight all the times. Hehe, I am lucky.
Comment from Wendy Gordon
Excellent
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What a wonderful, beautiful story. What a joy to have two little girls - although I am sure that was not an easy time. Well written. I wish you every success in your contest.

 Comment Written 29-Nov-2020


reply by the author on 29-Nov-2020
    Thank you. I totally enjoy them. There are more fun times than nuisances. Imagine one came to tell you her story or complaint (I have no idea) in her baby language, the other came to tell the same in baby language.

    Thank you for your review.
Comment from zanya
Excellent
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One of life's exceedingly happy moments - birth of children but not just one child , twins, told with the sheer joy experienced as the moments unfolded

 Comment Written 28-Nov-2020


reply by the author on 28-Nov-2020
    Thank you for your review. I really did not feel what real excitement is until my wife and I had the unexpected twins.
Comment from BethShelby
Excellent
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This is a great story and a very good one for the contest. Since you both wanted girls and had waited a while this was a perfect. I had twins also many years ago. I wanted a girl and my husband wanted a boy and that is exactly what we got.

and one pound life shrimps. (pound of live shrimps)

 Comment Written 28-Nov-2020


reply by the author on 28-Nov-2020
    It is great that things turn out as one wishes. I am glad you are generous about the rating. Definitely it was one of my happiest day in my life. I definitely could not concentrate on my conference on the next day but was still shocked to have twins.
Comment from Cynthia Adams1
Excellent
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What a wonderful story and you have told it very well.
Our excitement as readers echoed your excitement as you waited for the happy event.
I am very happy that all went well.
It is a good thing for the grandmothers that there were two babies...so much easier so there is no resentment. But a bit more work for the parents.
And here you and your wife are...you went from 0 to 2 in a day!
Congratulations on your blessed event and may God Bless.

 Comment Written 28-Nov-2020


reply by the author on 28-Nov-2020
    Thank you for your blessings. We wanted a girl and God has been generous for us. They are wonderful girls. they do not need much attention except when they needed a policeman to sort out their fights otherwise they played very well together.
reply by Cynthia Adams1 on 28-Nov-2020
    Ha ha. They will be blessings throughout your lives.
reply by the author on 28-Nov-2020
    thank you.
Comment from greyson ernst
Excellent
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i really like it i have no suggestions i may have just joined fanstory and i love it. i hope you keep righting good luck and keep righting and stay safe


sincerely Greyson Ernst

 Comment Written 28-Nov-2020


reply by the author on 28-Nov-2020
    Thank you for your review. I only recently joined it. Writing is fun. It is satisfying if one can share with others.

    Visit my blog
    www.good-advice-book.blogspot.com
    to read some more of my writing.
Comment from Daniel Massey
Excellent
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In paragraph two, replace 'last' with past. In four, take out have and replace it with 'had'. The stall keeper tried to sell us the (most) delete more expensive fish - deep sea life grouper. We ended buying a grouper about two pounds and one pound life shrimps. (I would add a comma, after pounds). I loved oyster but she did not like live oyster (put a comma after oyster) since she got pregnant. It took (delete-me) some convincing statements with the support of the stall keeper (add comma, after keeper) before she allowed me to buy one dozen. I would take out white wine, as most of your readers will know it is white wine.

Both of us were exceedingly happy that we started a family. We believed marriage without children was not complete/ Both of us were overjoyed to be starting a family and believed marriage without children wasn't complete.
We need to take the ferry boat/ We took the ferry boat. the paragraph starting; Every minute needs to be revised as to readable, paragraphs need to be only 6 sentences. Yours hits seven. /All of a sudden we heard a loud crying voice of our new-born Delete baby). We all looked at each other with joy. I said, "It 's a girl." No-one wanted to argue with me.
My mother-in-law being the crying kind, her eyes started to get wet. (No space between mother-in-law. But how about using: Tears fell down the cheeks of my wife and her mother.) a (ny) word(s) of any expression.
The ten minutes of waiting time were like a life time/Ten minutes felt like a life-time.
Finally there was another loud crying voice of a baby. I was then relieved/ I was relieved to hear the cries of our second unexpected child. It was twins. ( You could use this instead). If you go with my suggesion (two nurses came out with two babies and one of them said,"Beautiful twin girls." take this out).
( a comma before and, and I would add also after "Mine is )and said the same thing." Mine is fine."
I held the doctor's hands and shook them to thank him./ I shook the doctor's hand.
After that, I dashed into the operating room and said to my wife," I love you. We have TWO girls." (Did your wife not know you have two girls. Delete we have two girls). each can. (I would turn this around to: can each).

But otherwise, a beautiful story and for this reason, I have given you a rating of five . Congratulations!

 Comment Written 28-Nov-2020


reply by the author on 28-Nov-2020
    Thank you very much for helping my English. English is not my Mother language. I have the bad habit of thinking in my mother language and translate it into English.

    Please visit my blog which is written in two language.
    www.good-advice-book.blogspot.com

    Thank you for your through reading. And please stay in touch.