Background
I decided to document how this virus is affecting my sanity. So feel free to join me in this experience, I hope the reading will become funnier, then what I posted so far. Thank you for reading.
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Day 27
April 10, 2020
What's up with the world today? Since Coronella escaped China, everybody has become a virtual fitness and dance instructor. I guess I could become one too... I could be a very sexy sea lion dancer. I'm not kidding, you should see my curves.
Since I am glued to this chair more than 10 hours a day, go figure!
I start, every morning at 6.30 am, in Canada, and I leave straight for bed around midnight. Who says that is awesome to work from home? I slave more from home: work and do the chores in the time. Feed this, wash that! Write this, answer that! What's up brother? Midnight here, but morning somewhere else!
I work and listen to the holy services transmitted live from all over the world. This week is the Orthodox Easter, and I think I don't deserve it. This year, in Coronella time, I kept lent just for the last 3 weeks from the 40 days mandatory, I swear a lot, and I got in kamikaze mode at least 3 times a day. Thank you, Coronella, you can take the blame for this one too, right?
For example, today, I went kamikaze and swearing mode in the same time. My boss asked me to call her. So I call her. And praise the Lord, she complained that during my conference calls, she can hear a voice in the background. I said nothing, and start to think: the kitties are meowing, but usually around 10 am they are napping. I am going in full denial that usually is just me in the room!
Suddenly I hear a voice, and it was not the voice of reason, but the voice of my husband. He is teaching on-line classes to his students from the engineering program. He doesn't hear very well with his left ear, and is trying to compensate for that by loud speaking. Even if he teaches from home, he is stuck in the teaching mode, as in the real classroom, and it never occurred to him, that he is not in class so he doesn't have to shout when he is teaching... on-line.
Even if we are in different rooms, you can still hear him. I apologized to my Boss, and said that unfortunately, I didn't have money to buy a huge house before Coronella hit us. For now, I am stuck in a two bedroom apartment and I am working from my living room. My Boss then had a brilliant idea: she asked me to tell him to move the class when I have the conference calls.
Immediately my face falls in an imaginary pool of water. I am doing the fish stanza, opening and closing my mouth with no sound. In the background my mind it's racing 100 killometers per hour and prays for a witty answer.
Boss, as you know my conference calls doesn't occur on the same day and time. We organize those meetings when the client is available. On the other hand, Coronella or not, his schedule is fixed, the class occurs every week at the same time. I can't tell him to move stuff short notice, because the kids might have a different class to attend.
She paused for a second, and finally says: O.K., but I am giving you heads up, if the Manager hears about this...
I am praying in the background: shut up, don't say anything to make it worse. And here she goes: the crazy Romanian in defensive mode. I am so sorry boss, but I can't control this. What about the people that are stuck with their kids in one bedroom apartments. Is there fault that is not very quiet in the house? I have asked him to speak in a normal tone, but after 10 minutes he forgets and goes back in full blast. If the Manager says something, I will tell him the same thing. Thank you so much for the heads up.
Boss tells me that she needs to take another call, the Manager is on the other line. Thank you, Jesus! Saved by another phone call.
I can close my eyes and hear the love of my life in the background. I know exactly when he is taking a break or tries to be witty with the students when he asks them: "Do you follow? Are you with me?" I am answering from my improvised office: "Unfortunately, yes."
I heard that Coronella is going to give us a break for the summer. I am going to propose to my husband to buy a house, so I can be prepared for the next outbreak when I have to work from home. In this way, happy wife, happy life, and screw you, Coronella.
Author Notes
I am using Coronella instead of Corona, I think is sound funnier:)
For my readers and reviewers, please forgive me for my bad English, since is my third language, I am using this cheap excuse to ask for your help in correcting the grammar and the other mistakes.
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