FanStory.com - The Culturin' Up of Forest Frederickby michaelcahill
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Song lyrics
The Culturin' Up of Forest Frederick by michaelcahill
    Lyrics Make The Song Contest Contest Winner 

Warning: The author has noted that this contains the highest level of sexual content.


The Culturin' Up of Forest Frederick
 
 
VERSE
 
'Twas said, "He's a n'er do well slobber slog,
his thinkin' akin to a droolin' dog.
His mind always fixed on his hangin' log;
without proper meter, he's but a hog...."
 
Lady Hornette took a shine to this cad
and secretly dreamed of the tools he had.
Her Prince was a gentle soul, but right sad--
'twas all pomp and powder-- lovin' was bad.
 
 

CHORUS
 
The fools won't catch wind of our deviltry,
naked encounters delicious and free ...
animals wilder than anyone's seen,
they'll hear werewolves howl, when hearing our screams!
 


VERSE
 
To make Forest Fred'rick a swell court consort,
she'd have to work wonders, and cover warts.
He'd have to learn patience, his instincts abort,
and curb his crude tongue with witty retorts.
 
Iambic pentameter whispers with class,
the smooth dulcet verbiage dazzles with sass.
Cats screwing noisily sprawled on the grass,
spoken iambic, ring soft, smooth as glass.
 
 

BRIDGE
 
Now, Freddie dear, just repeat after me:
"I'm here to service the Princesses needs,
unbunching panties, adjusting her knees,
exercise, sirs, her needs I'll appease.
 
Fitness of body lends fuel to the fur;
a satisfied carriage will certainly purr ...
'twill give you a lass satisfying for sure.
I'll service her well, take fine care of her.
 
 

CHORUS
 
The fools won't catch wind of our deviltry,
naked encounters delicious and free--
animals wilder than anyone's seen.
They'll hear werewolves howl, when hearing our screams!
 
 

Second Bridge--
 
All of this bliss for the learning of meter.
'Tis most worth it, yes, to wield your sweet heater?
Yes, fair Hornette, I'll make your totter teeter,
and sate your great thirst, dear, litre by litre.
 


Fade out with chorus ...






 
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Contest Winner

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Author Notes


A drunkin' Irish drinkin' song to be sung by drinkin' drunkin' Irishmen along with some lovely Irish lassies, if they've a mind to....

     

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