Look deeper, see me. by Possummagic
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What do you see when you look at me Mommy? Can you see further than my blonde hair and big blue eyes? Can you see the little boy trapped deep inside?
I know that my shouting hurts your head Mommy. You don't always understand what I want, when I flap my hands, run around and make loud noises. But you have Daddy to talk to and I'm so alone. When I can't sleep for most of the night, Mommy, I know the whole family is awake too, and that you are all exhausted. Do you ever wonder if I am tired too? You send me to "program" Mommy, to give you respite from my noises, my strange movements and my wet nappies. Do you ever think, that I would like a break from this too? Look into my eyes, Mommy, I know it is difficult because my eyes look everywhere but at you. But what do you see? A word, a diagnosis, or a little boy trapped inside, alone and afraid? I know I have Autism, Mommy. You and Daddy often talk about it, with the doctors at the big hospital. They say that I will never speak, but how do they know, Mommy? I have words and sounds locked away. I practice them every day, but to you they are just noises. Mommy, I know that you're tired. I know you're sad and I know you're frustrated. But please, remember that I'm just a little boy, Mommy, trapped inside a lonely, empty world and one day.... I'd like to come out to play with you.
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