'Tis the day before Christmas and I'm stuck in the mall.
The traffic is moving at barely a crawl.
There's snow on the rooftops, the roadways and lawns.
That's good for ole Santa, but rough on his pawns
My home coming family is stranded out there
and the reason is simple, they're coming by air.
My internet purchases have yet to arrive
and come Christmas morning, they will skin me alive.
I tried to send greetings, but failed with my fax.
I've extended my credit, right up to the max.
I'm planning on sweeping this under the rug
and settling my nerves with Bah!Bah! Humbug.
Tonight I'll thaw turkey and pour myself sherry,
get snug, warm and cozy and make myself merry.
At this special moment, perhaps I should write-
Merry Christmas to all and don't get up tight.
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