Warning: The author has noted that this contains the highest level of violence.
"Heart of Mine 2003"
Written on June 19th, 2021
By Doctor Ricky 1024
Copyright �?�© Fanstory 2021
'All Rights Reserved'
"Within the Dark Corners of the Human Mind a Portal of Evil can Bloom" (Theology 48:09)
...
And, it's been so many years since the accident that took my son away.
He would actually have doubled in age.
(From Eighteen to Thirty Six)
To his November 5th I say.
...
'It's been hard son.'
'Yes, so very hard.'
I complain.
'Yes Dad I know and I so wish I could be with you below but...
...
Sprinkled Investments of Pain.
Ran down and entangled within my Brain.
There's not much ..
Not much more I can say?
...
'Dad are you here with Me?'
'I just need to know why did I have to die?'
Asks Jay.
'Well to tell you the truth my Son.'
'I'm confounded with that kid.'
'Yes, the kid?'
'That nasty kid Brian Cole?'
'Something went wrong with that kid Jay.'
'I found out after the accident.'
'That he was heavily dozed off antidepressant called Effexor.'
...
Yes, that day I ponder
The silence so passes and again I get a chance to converse with my son Jason.
...
It's now only been a few days since the original accident on March 31st, 2003.
It's April 4th 2003.
( 8:00 p.m)
Yes, and it's almost exactly the same moment again?
You see that Vision of my son Jay appears.
...
'Dad?'
"Dad, I need you!'
He sounds frightened.'
I thought.
What is it son?:
'Dad it's dark, so very dark.'
It's okay soon you will see...
I reply.
Three hours later...
...
11:08 PM.
Again he appears but no more in tears?
"It's okay now dad.'
'He speaks to me!'
'Who Jay?'
I ask.
'God dad!'
'He told me not to cry anymore and he said just take my hand.'
'So I did and I feel like this feeling of delight!'
...
'I looked down and I saw me?'
'And, He said that was normal.'
'And, it's called Resurrection.'
'And, then He carefully lifted Me!:
'And, God told me, Dad that this is a gift!'
...
'Well I have to go Dad.:
'And, I'll see you soon.'
'And, I know where I'm going.'
'But I hope they got a drum set?'
...
Seven months passed without even a word?
I forgot that it's over.
Yes, and he probably doesn't need me anymore.
But then my youngest daughter Dana's birthday comes and she is turning Eighteen.
And, Dana now is the same age as Jason when he left.
But wishes for only one thing
Yes, only wish.
She wishes for mommy to be happy again.
...
Note: Carolyn was so filled with hate and grief that she wore what I called a "Mask of Death?"
Yes, she was so filled with hate.
She would stay in Jason's room on his Dell computer all day long.
Just listening to the same Sad Cher CD and playing bingo.
And, she told me that she wishes that the driver was dead!
...
But instead?
Yes a miracle happened!
Instead of watching her slowly dissipate and extreme misery and hate.
And, it was only Eight months later after Jason passed away.
Carolyn purposely, so stopped her medications for her heart.
And, she too passed away on November 23rd 2003.
...
I guess you could say it was from a Broken Heart but it was actually a blood clot from the leg to the heart.
D.V.T or Deep Vernacular Thrombosis.
...
I didn't understand it at first but now I do.
And, it's a mother's love for her child.
And, all she wanted was to be with her son and her dreams came true.
So, I think back and wonder why?
She had so much to possibly look forward to.
Our four daughters and one granddaughter.
And, three other grandchildren on the way.
But I know that she felt guilty and if she was here today?
Yes, this is what she would say...
"Heart of Mine"
By Carolyn Ann Richmond
Harbach Smrkovsky
'This Heart of mine has been through so much...
'So much pain and so much grief...
'But now my time has come for relief.'
...
'And, I have decided that it's much better this way.'
'Yes, to go and take care of my baby boy Jay...
'And, I leave you with these words.'
'So Divine...
'Because now finally the love that I lost?'
'And, now again feel?'
'Deep inside...
'My Broken Heart, Soul and Mind...
'Is finally within this...
"Heart of Mine"
Carolyn Ann Richmond Harbach Smrkovsky
December 6th, 1952~
November 23rd, 2003.
Rest in Peace Baby....
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Author Notes
Special thanks goes out first, as always, to Heavenly Father and His Son Jesus Christ.
Fanstory and Tom the Administrator.
Fan Art Review, this Talented Artist,
'Jasper 56'
And, their Incredible Picture Entitled, "Lovers Under God's Splendor"
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