| Humor Flash Fiction posted August 10, 2020 |
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expensive marchandise
Ashera
by Iza Deleanu
It was after midnight, I finally decided to bail on my favourite show and go to bed. My kitties were already there. As I was carefully preparing my nest, I heard a discreet tap at the door. I pretended that I didn't hear it. What the heck, I didn't expect anybody. I finally managed to get my perfect spot, then here it comes: tap-tap.
"What the heck? Quietly, I approached the door and waited: tap-tap. After the last tap, I asked: Who is there?"
"Madame, I am the police!"
"Police!"
"Madame, please, we need to talk."
"Officer it's midnight, I am not opening the door until I am seeing some ID. "
"I am so sorry Madame to show up at your door uninvited, here is my ID."
"Just pass it over, please."
"That's unbelievable! Fine, here you are!"
"I took the ID and checked it in the data base. The ID was legit. I am Sabrina, and I work undercover on drug case in this neighbourhood, how the heck did they found out?"
I opened the door. Wow, the guy was looking so hot. Flash News: is this guy an Officer ... Stripper? Knock it out, Sabrina, snap out of it, and act professional."
"Good Morning, Sir, what can I do for you?"
"Morning? Oh, yeah it's past midnight. I am here, because I need access to your balcony. Someone called us from the apartment below, and we need to get there quietly."
"We? I am just a normal citizen, Officer, no Spider Woman powers in pocket."
"Come on, Sabrina. I know who you are. They are moving the merchandise tonight, so we have to catch them in the act."
"You know me, Officer Sanders?"
"Not until five minutes ago. Voinikov told me to say Zdrasti!"
"OK, zdrasti makes you legit. But do we have to get into the apartment via my balcony? Why can we just wait for them outside?"
"We don't want them to kill the merchandise. This is the only way, trust me."
"Oh, brother, here comes one Miss Smith jumping over the balcony."
"By the way do you know what's the merchandise?"
"No, not really! All I know is that whatever is there is alive and very expensive."
"Fine, let's hope there are no creepy crawlers! Follow me, Officer."
We snuck out quietly into my neighbour's balcony. I heard some meows. Nope, those are not my tigers. The neighbor was chasing 10 cats and was trying to put them into a special crate. I looked at Sanders, and he ushered me inside.
I took my gun and said: "Hands up!" My neighbor tried to run away, but one of those gigantic cats brushed his legs and he stumbled and fell. Finally, the back-up team showed up with animal protection.
Laughing I said: this is crazy, contraband with cats?
"Yes, now I get it. Sabrina, these are Ashera cats, one costs 100,000 American dollars. Just imagine with 10 you can get a house in a posh neighborhood."
Flash Fiction Writing Contest contest entry
It was after midnight, I finally decided to bail on my favourite show and go to bed. My kitties were already there. As I was carefully preparing my nest, I heard a discreet tap at the door. I pretended that I didn't hear it. What the heck, I didn't expect anybody. I finally managed to get my perfect spot, then here it comes: tap-tap.
"What the heck? Quietly, I approached the door and waited: tap-tap. After the last tap, I asked: Who is there?"
"Madame, I am the police!"
"Police!"
"Madame, please, we need to talk."
"Officer it's midnight, I am not opening the door until I am seeing some ID. "
"I am so sorry Madame to show up at your door uninvited, here is my ID."
"Just pass it over, please."
"That's unbelievable! Fine, here you are!"
"I took the ID and checked it in the data base. The ID was legit. I am Sabrina, and I work undercover on drug case in this neighbourhood, how the heck did they found out?"
I opened the door. Wow, the guy was looking so hot. Flash News: is this guy an Officer ... Stripper? Knock it out, Sabrina, snap out of it, and act professional."
"Good Morning, Sir, what can I do for you?"
"Morning? Oh, yeah it's past midnight. I am here, because I need access to your balcony. Someone called us from the apartment below, and we need to get there quietly."
"We? I am just a normal citizen, Officer, no Spider Woman powers in pocket."
"Come on, Sabrina. I know who you are. They are moving the merchandise tonight, so we have to catch them in the act."
"You know me, Officer Sanders?"
"Not until five minutes ago. Voinikov told me to say Zdrasti!"
"OK, zdrasti makes you legit. But do we have to get into the apartment via my balcony? Why can we just wait for them outside?"
"We don't want them to kill the merchandise. This is the only way, trust me."
"Oh, brother, here comes one Miss Smith jumping over the balcony."
"By the way do you know what's the merchandise?"
"No, not really! All I know is that whatever is there is alive and very expensive."
"Fine, let's hope there are no creepy crawlers! Follow me, Officer."
We snuck out quietly into my neighbour's balcony. I heard some meows. Nope, those are not my tigers. The neighbor was chasing 10 cats and was trying to put them into a special crate. I looked at Sanders, and he ushered me inside.
I took my gun and said: "Hands up!" My neighbor tried to run away, but one of those gigantic cats brushed his legs and he stumbled and fell. Finally, the back-up team showed up with animal protection.
Laughing I said: this is crazy, contraband with cats?
"Yes, now I get it. Sabrina, these are Ashera cats, one costs 100,000 American dollars. Just imagine with 10 you can get a house in a posh neighborhood."
"What the heck? Quietly, I approached the door and waited: tap-tap. After the last tap, I asked: Who is there?"
"Madame, I am the police!"
"Police!"
"Madame, please, we need to talk."
"Officer it's midnight, I am not opening the door until I am seeing some ID. "
"I am so sorry Madame to show up at your door uninvited, here is my ID."
"Just pass it over, please."
"That's unbelievable! Fine, here you are!"
"I took the ID and checked it in the data base. The ID was legit. I am Sabrina, and I work undercover on drug case in this neighbourhood, how the heck did they found out?"
I opened the door. Wow, the guy was looking so hot. Flash News: is this guy an Officer ... Stripper? Knock it out, Sabrina, snap out of it, and act professional."
"Good Morning, Sir, what can I do for you?"
"Morning? Oh, yeah it's past midnight. I am here, because I need access to your balcony. Someone called us from the apartment below, and we need to get there quietly."
"We? I am just a normal citizen, Officer, no Spider Woman powers in pocket."
"Come on, Sabrina. I know who you are. They are moving the merchandise tonight, so we have to catch them in the act."
"You know me, Officer Sanders?"
"Not until five minutes ago. Voinikov told me to say Zdrasti!"
"OK, zdrasti makes you legit. But do we have to get into the apartment via my balcony? Why can we just wait for them outside?"
"We don't want them to kill the merchandise. This is the only way, trust me."
"Oh, brother, here comes one Miss Smith jumping over the balcony."
"By the way do you know what's the merchandise?"
"No, not really! All I know is that whatever is there is alive and very expensive."
"Fine, let's hope there are no creepy crawlers! Follow me, Officer."
We snuck out quietly into my neighbour's balcony. I heard some meows. Nope, those are not my tigers. The neighbor was chasing 10 cats and was trying to put them into a special crate. I looked at Sanders, and he ushered me inside.
I took my gun and said: "Hands up!" My neighbor tried to run away, but one of those gigantic cats brushed his legs and he stumbled and fell. Finally, the back-up team showed up with animal protection.
Laughing I said: this is crazy, contraband with cats?
"Yes, now I get it. Sabrina, these are Ashera cats, one costs 100,000 American dollars. Just imagine with 10 you can get a house in a posh neighborhood."
The Ashera cats are the most expensive breed in the world. An original costs 100,000 american dollars. Zdrasti, means Hi in Bulgarian.
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