Give me a pen to free my sins

As I ascend
with my pen in the wind.
Ready to let the words fly,
little pieces of my mind like bullets in the sky.

Shoot Shoot Bang Bang
I have to let them out or I'll go insane.
Falling down on the paper like raindrops,
full of pain drops.

My life my way, I'll heal myself
or kill myself.
But, it'll be on my own terms.
I can do it alone.

Put my emotions in check.
Trying to fix this wreck,
Of a life that I've created, devestated, complicated, and reevaluated.

Changed my ways,
looking forward to brighter days.
But, hey life's a maze.
Amazing if you find your way.

But, it's a fact
that
I need words to flow.
With rhymes that blow,
up like a bomb to keep my soul intact.

It gives me the peace I need,
to cease the tears I bleed.
To stop the hurt i feel,
I don't take a pill.

Just my will, no psychiatrist bill,
will kill this deal, I'll just seal this deal.
Start to feel, and see what's real.

Yeah the price is steep and,
it burns deep.
But, talk ain't cheap,
It's for keeps.

Once the words fly out,
like birds fly out.
You feel the weight lifting off you
killing the demons that possess
As you confess,

your sins,
You're the loser that wins.
This game of life, is not a game,
it's real,
it injures and it kills.

Karma has a bitch slap you can feel.
Nothing can save you,
you just learn to deal.
Start to heal.

Send the past back.
a personal blast back.
As your conscience adds up,
But it doesn't add up,

Cause now you've changed,
rearranged,
taken blame,
accepted the price of fame.

Just trying to be me,
Live free.
Have my voice heard, write it out like a letter.
Make me better.

To keep me well rounded,
stay grounded.
Not to re-offend.
Not wasting borrowed time again.

The answers don't come when your sinning.
But, flow freely when you're winning.
This war will keep you in check ,
and either you'll wreck

Or you will start the 8th inning
By proving your worthy of a new beginning.
Start it all over, not taking bets.
New life, no regrets.