General Poetry posted January 15, 2020


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Say, what's in this drink?

by Mark Valentine

To the tune of “Baby It’s Cold Outside”
 
(SHE and HE, each singing aside to the audience and not directly to each other)
 
(SHE): Say what’s in this drink?  (HE): I slipped in a pill just now.

(SHE): Does he really think (HE): We’ll Netflix and chill somehow.

(SHE): That I’d spend the night with a creep like him?

(HE): Some girls are just too gosh-darn prim!

(SHE): I think this drink just might cause me

(HE): A little trick I learned from Bill Cosby.

(SHE): To fall asleep right here on his couch.

(HE): At dirty tricks I’m really no slouch.

(SHE): This guy’s a real villain,

(SHE & HE TOGETHER): He/I put a pill in there!
 
 
(still singing aside to the audience)

 
(SHE): I can’t stay awake. (HE): The rufis are workin’ now.

(SHE): Think quick for God’s sake! (HE): She thinks I’m a jerk right now.

(SHE): I’ll just call the cops – his plan they’ll thwart.

(HE): She’ll never prove her case in court.

(SHE): I speed-dialed 9-1-1 on my phone.

(HE): I can’t believe that we’re all alone.

(SHE): I hope that they can trace where I’m at.

(HE): She’ll be out in two minutes flat.

(SHE): They’ll come soon, God willin’.

(SHE & HE TOGETHER): He/I put a pill in there!
 
 
(Now singing directly to each other)

 
(HE): Say what is that noise? (SHE): Baby, there’s cops outside.

(HE): You know how boys will be boys? (SHE): Explain to the cops outside.

(HE): Just wanted to have some good clean fun.

(SHE): I hope they shoot you with their guns.

(HE): I’m just your average red-blooded male,

(SHE): Who’s gonna spend a long time in jail.

(HE): In search of a romantic escape.

(SHE): I think the word you’re looking for’s “rape”.

(SHE): On ice you’ll be chillin’,

(SHE & HE TOGETHER): Cuz you/I put a pill in there!

 


The Drink Poetry writing prompt entry
Writing Prompt
Write a poem. You (or your character) take a sip of a drink and feel different. What happens?


"Netflix and Chill" is young people slang for having sex.
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© Copyright 2020. Mark Valentine All rights reserved.
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