“I am very yappy to see you,”
my dog said when I came home.
“I am purr-fectly happy, too,” said my cat.
I promised nevermore to roam,
and they both were pleased with that.
I looked in the fridge for some food for our tea,
but there wasn’t enough for all of us three.
So the cat caught a big fat rat,
and the dog chased a hog from under a log.
When they brought home what they had caught
there was plenty after all of their sport.
I cooked it in a pot and served it hot,
and what a yummy stew it tasted to me,
and best of all – the meat was free!
Then I took a book, went to bed and read,
until I nodded off, such a sleepyhead.
I slipped into slumber and dreamed a dream,
but not everything was as it would seem.
My cat and my dog were happy, ’tis true,
but other things had an opinion, too.
My twitching feet said, “We’ll step out with pride,”
and my frizzy hair said, “I’ll brush this aside.”
“You’ve put a zip back in my life,” said my pants,
and they high-kicked up in a fancy dance.
My legs said, “We’ll pull up our socks for you,”
then my lower half danced a mad Bugaboo.
So I pinched myself and woke out of my dream
to hear the sound of my fearful scream,
for it felt like I was having a fit –
and I wasn’t happy with that, not a bit!
It must have been that muddled-up stew
that stuck to my innards like lumpy glue,
then jumped into action when I was asleep,
and caused my limbs to prance and leap.
In future I’ll eat only vegetable food,
and my tummy should stay in a peaceful mood!
