Humor Poetry posted July 18, 2019


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Rhymed humorous poem about volunteer work singing shows

Still Stuck in the Chute

by CrystieCookie999

Funny poem about your job Contest Winner 
Still Stuck in the Chute

I wanna be a country singer--got me a guitar
and figure, in a dozen years, I'm gonna be a star.
I'm brushin' up on dancin' like the great Shania Twain
and smilin' sweet like Patsy Cline, like sun defyin' rain.
I've memorized those hometown lines that Reba always drawls
and dressed up to the nines with country duds from seven malls.
My hair's as big as Dolly's, like a helmet made of hair.
I shimmy just like Faith Hill, and it's Wranglers that I wear.
All day I practice to perform for friends and all my folks,
ignorin' all the critics, all the groans, and jabs, and jokes.
You see, I'm on my way to fame, except for one small thing:
I get a HORSE-ness in my throat, most every time I sing!
It's not a little wheezy colt' it's more a buckin' bronc!
The air goes upside backwards, and out comes a snortin' honk,
and then I whinny tryin' hard to get that air back down
(by then my Patsy smile has turned to Johnny Cash's frown).
The more I try to stable-ize my voice, the worse it goes.
I feel like jumpin' all around, to get it out my nose.
My shimmy turns into a tremblin' mass of shaky skin!
The lyrics leave my mind while nothin' seems to rein them in!
I guess I should be grateful with this malady for now.
It would be worse--to lose the horse--and sing just like a COW!

Writing Prompt
Write a humorous poem about your job. It can be any job, but it has to rhyme.

Funny poem about your job
Contest Winner

Recognized


Had several volunteer work commitments to perform in a college choir and had to sing a country version of "Grandma Got Run Over By A Reindeer" during Christmas in nursing homes and other settings. Had a guitar once. Have a ukulele now.
Pays one point and 2 member cents.

Artwork by Denise B at FanArtReview.com

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