Someone knocked gently on the bedroom door.  Yasmin pulled the covers higher over her face so that only her eyes showed.
 
“Who is it?” she asked, her voice just strong enough to carry to the door.
 
The door opened and Jane entered, carrying a tray.
 
“Just me,” she said, pushing the door closed with her heel.
 
Yasmin threw the covers down and sat up.
 
“They made me do it again,” she snarled, all weakness suddenly gone from her voice.  “They made me!”
 
“I know.”  Jane place the tray on the bedside table and sat on the edge of the bed.  She stroked a stray hair from Yasmin’s face.  Yasmin batted her hand away and folded her arms.
 
“I hate them.  I hate them all.  I wish he’d just die already.”
 
“Your Highness!”  Jane’s hand flew to her mouth.  She looked around the chamber wide-eyed, then leant forward.  “You mustn’t,” she whispered.  “Someone will hear.”
 
“So what?  What are they going to do?  You don’t know what it’s like.  If they tortured me it wouldn’t be as bad as what they make me do.  And it’s not like they’d kill me.  Sometimes I wish they would.”
 
Jane stroked Yasmin’s shoulder.  “I’m so sorry, but seriously, you can’t say things like that.  They’ll find out.  They always do, and you know they can always make things worse.”
 
“Worse?  Worse than doing – doing that thing?  Worse than how I feel afterwards?”
 
“Poor you.  Can you eat?  I brought soup.”
 
Yasmin screwed her face up.  “Soup?”
 
“There might be a bit of cake too.”
 
“I’m not hungry.  I want to throw up.  I can’t eat.”
 
“What about some water?”
 
“What about something stronger?”
 
“Ha!  I wish.  You know they won’t let you.”
 
“If you were really my friend, you’d get some somehow.”
 
Jane frowned.  “You know they check the tray.  I’m sorry.  I know it’s horrible for you, but what – “
 
Someone knocked on the door.  Yasmin threw herself back into her bed and pulled the covers up to her nose.
 
“Who is it?” she asked in her sick voice.
 
The door opened to reveal the Chancellor.
 
“Your Highness.  May I come in?”
 
“No!”
 
He treated the women to a humourless smile.  “Your Highness is pleased to joke.”  He stepped into the room.  “How are we feeling?”
 
“Like shit warmed up.”
 
The Chancellor winced.  “At least Your Highness is warm.  What can the Household do to aid your recovery?  Or are we so sick we should call a physic?  Personally, I’d only sink to that as a last resort.”
 
“You’ve done enough, don’t you think?”
 
The Chancellor bowed.  “I’m pleased you think so.”
 
“No, that wasn’t a compli – oh, very funny.”  Yasmin turned her back and pulled the covers completely over her head.  “Go away.”
 
“If it helps, I am truly sorry,” said the Chancellor.
 
“Yeah, right,” came her voice, muffled by the blankets.
 
“But sadly, we cannot always choose our path.  I can no more turn you away from your duty than you can.  All I can do is make the mean time as tolerable as possible.”
 
“I’m not listening.”
 
“As you wish, Your Highness.  Fortunately, I like listening to myself.  Words are my profession, and I must practice at every opportunity.”  He looked around the room and indicated a chair.  “May I sit?”
 
“No.  You may piss off.”
 
“Thank you.”  The Chancellor wiped non-existent dust from the cushion and sat.  “It pains me to trouble you at such a time, but I’m afraid it’s time for your lessons.”
 
“My what?  I’m not six.”
 
“No, indeed.  Nevertheless, there are lessons to be learned at any age, and one in particular, I’m afraid.  Today’s lesson is entitled, ‘steering your boat through rapids’.”
 
“I’m not in the mood for your weird little in-jokes.”
 
“Please rest assured, I am in deadly earnest, and this lesson is one you will learn if you wish to live.”  He held up his hand to stop the princess’ protest.  “Yes, I know you want to die.  It goes without saying all young women of your age want to die, as well as wishing the rest of the world dead too, and yet you have failed to throw yourself our of the window, nor have you opened any major arteries with a fruit knife, so I’m going to assume that, miserable as you are, it is not yet a terminal condition.”
 
He waved a hand at the walls.  “You are a relatively new resident of the Imperial palace, a city within a city.  Every city, every town, every village, has its rules for survival.  You and I would not survive a night in, say, a village on the northern border, nor would one of them survive a minute in the citadel.  The citadel is a fine place if you have money or can shine in a trade.  Not so the palace.  This is a dangerous place, as I keep telling you, and as you keep ignoring, so let me tell you exactly why it’s so dangerous and what you need to do – what you are going to do – in order to live.”
 
“I know what I have to do.”
 
“It’s more than just – comforting – the emperor when he needs.  It is much more than that.  You are both blessed and cursed, and that blessing and curse fall on all around you.  You know of the Great War?”
 
“Of course I do.  I’m not ignorant.”
 
“You know who started it?”
 
“The Cursed.  They tamed the great dragons and tried to destroy us because they were greedy.”
 
The Chancellor see-sawed his hand.  “Yes.  That is what we are told.  And to a point, it’s true.  And yet, it’s not.  What were you told about the Cursed?  They were monsters?  They were giants?  They had sharp teeth and ate babies for breakfast?”
 
Yasmin turned to face the Chancellor.  “I’m not a baby.  Stop talking to me as though I were.”
 
He held up his hand.  “I’m sorry.  But nevertheless, that’s what they were, no?  Monsters?  Monstrous, certainly.”
 
“I guess.”
 
The Chancellor shook his head.  “No, they were us.  Or at least, as much like us that you could not tell the difference.  How do you steer a boat in rapids?”
 
“What?” said Yasmin, confused at the sudden turn.
 
“Rapids.  It’s where a river rushes through – “

“I know what rapids are.  What’s that got to do with anything?”
 
“The current is strong.  The water rages.  Rocks lie both above the water where they can be seen, and underneath where they can’t.  The boat rushes on in the current, unable to fight it.  So how do you steer it?”
 
Yasmin shook her head.
 
“A touch here, an oar there.  You don’t fight the current, you work with it.  You don’t expend all your energy; you use the energy of the river.  A word can change history.  A touch.  Even a thought.  The Cursed understood this.  More, they could channel it.  Some could make grown men weep like a baby, just by singing.  Some could bend iron and fire to their will, just by thinking.  Some could inflict pain with a touch.”
 
The Chancellor hauled himself out of the chair.
 
“And some could take pain away with a touch.”  He paused, staring at the princess.  “And this is why such behaviour is forbidden.  The Great War almost destroyed us, and it must never happen again.  Of course, rank has its privileges and an Emperor can commit no crime.  Even so, it’s dangerous.  The Archbishop wants you dead.  Oh, don’t look so shocked.  He won’t admit it, won’t say it out loud.  Saying things out loud is dangerous, isn’t that right, my lady?”  He arched an eyebrow at Jane, who blushed.  “Nevertheless, to the church you are an abomination.  The Health ministry want you under their arm.  No doubt they would leach you white in order to find out your secret.  But no, you are a ward of the Household, but that means we are both hated and envied, at least whilst the emperor, may he live a thousand years, still needs you.  There are no neutral players in the palace.  We are all trying to steer our own boats through the rapids, and if that means someone else’s boat is smashed, then so be it.”
 
He walked towards the door, but paused with his hand on the latch.  “So it would be incredibly helpful, Your Highness, if you could refrain from standing up and rocking the boat.  And eat your soup, or I’ll have the cook beaten.”  He bowed low.  “Your Highness.  My Lady.”  Then he turned and left the two women alone.