General Script posted January 5, 2019

Chapters:

...57 58 -59- 60...

Exceptional

a one-scene script

A chapter in the book Scenes

Scene at a Mock Interview

by Bill Schott

Ned practices with Pons for a job interview . Ned: Mighty square a you ta hep me wit my job innerfew, Pons. Pons: My pleasure, Ned. In today's job market it always pays to be prepared for an interview. Ned:  Go ahead and shoot me some questions and I'll answer the heck outta 'em. Pons: Right. Okay. Hey, Ned, let's do this from the beginning.  Go out of the room and knock on the door. Ned:  Which door do I knock on, Pons? Pons: This one.     Pointing at the room door. Ned:  What fer assackly? Pons: So you can enter the room to be interviewed. Ned: This sounds like deys-ya-foo ta me. Pons. Pons: The reasoning, Ned, is to simulate your first arriving for an interview. Ned: I thunk we was doin' that right here? Pons: Okay, Ned.  Look. I'll go outside and knock. You be the interviewer and tell me to come in. Ned:  Okeedokee. Pons walks out of the room and knocks on the door.  Ned: That you, Pons? Pons:  May I come in? Ned: Do ya know the password? Pons opens the door and enters the room smiling. Pons: Hello, sir.  My name is Pons. We have a noon appointment. Ned: It ain't even ten a'clock yet, Mr. Pons. Your a tad early. See ya in a coupla hours. Pons: Let's just say it's noon now, Ned. Ned: Well, Mr. Pons, ya got any identerfercation? Pons: Uh, well, yes, but it's in my car. Ned:  What kinda car ya got? Pons: Sighing.  Look, Ned. Let's switch roles so I can ask the questions. Ned: Ya sensitive 'bout yer car, Pons. Pons: No. I would just like to get to the important stuff. Ned:  Well, Pons, ya need a decent car to get ta them places. Pons: Let's begin. Hi, Ned. Welcome to Pons Enterprises. Ned: I'm happier than a tape worm in a buddah belly. Pons: Right. Well I've read your résumé. Ned: Ya did? What'd it say? Pons: Okay, Ned. You don't actually have a résumé yet. Ned: How'd ya read it then? Pons: Getting a little upset with Ned's lack of cooperation.  I'm clarivoiant, Ned. Okay? Ned: That's why ya left yer identerfercation in the car; ain't it?  Yain't Pons; yer Clara Voyant. Pons: What? Ned: Ya must a took Pons hostich when he left the room. Where's Pons at Clara? If that's yer real name. Pons: Staring off into the corner.   Pons is in the bathroom, Ned.  All a big joke. I'll go get him. Leaves the room and quickly re-enters. Ned: Hey, Pons. Pons: Hey, Ned. Look, let's do this tomorrow. I need to print out some résumé formats so we can build your work history. Ned: Don't I need a job afore I get a history a jobbin'? Pons: Haven't you ever worked anywhere, Ned? Ned: I raked the lawn;  chopped up wood fer the fire; and I used ta babysit fer Ma's bingo pardner's neighbor's nanny's mother's sister's daughters' friend's baby. Pons: Did they pay you? Ned: Just the one. Pons: That's a job then, Ned. Ned:  Wow. This innerfewin's somethin' else, fer sure.  It ain't even noon yet and I gotta a job.   Write A Review Image from Google Pays one point and 2 member cents. You need to login or register to write reviews. It's quick! We only ask four questions to new members.