General Poetry posted September 19, 2018


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A friend to the end

Ode to Charmin

by Mark Valentine

O, Blessèd roll with sheets of white
That brings my anus such delight
Such gentle comfort you produce
Whene’er I need to drop a deuce
 
Thy double plies of downy fluff
Doth wipe away the nasty stuff
And maketh what was vile, good
Like Mr. Whipple said you would
 
When I’m beset by diarrhea
My backside’s always glad to see ya
And how your loving touch avoids
Exacerbating hemorrhoids
 
So well you clean my derriere
I never stain my underwear
Thy texture is so rich and plush
It pains me when I have to flush
 
And when evacuation’s through
And I am finished in the loo
Thy subtle chamomile scent
Betrays no hint of excrement
 
You’ve always been a faithful friend
I know you’ll be there in the end
Such loyalty is hard to find
You never leave your friends behind

 



Ode Poetry writing prompt entry
Writing Prompt
Write an Ode poem. It is a poem praising a person, place or thing.
Pays one point and 2 member cents.


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