I wish I were a perfect parent. I would give anything to turn back the hands of time and fix my mistakes...but then I wouldn't have learned from them. And, learn I have.

Our oldest son, Leland, was bitten by the military bug when he was very young. By the time he started kindergarten, he had decided he wanted to be in the Air Force. He spent his childhood playing army man and pretending to be a pilot. I would watch him, playing outside with his friends, crawling on his tummy to sneak up on someone. His bedroom walls were covered with posters of jets. When he heard a jet flying over, he would watch it until he couldn't see it any longer, with this huge smile on his face.

One night, when Leland was around six years old, my husband and I were in the living room watching television. It was late and the kids had been in bed for quite a while. All of a sudden, Leland came racing down the hallway, with nothing on but his tidy whities. He ran past his dad and me and straight out the front door.

"Leland!" I yelled after him, but he didn't stop.

I ran to the door and searched the darkness for my son. He was standing at the end of our sidewalk staring into the sky.

"Leland!" I shouted in a loud whisper. "What are you doing?! You're practically naked!"

Leland came back inside, a huge smile plastered across his face. I was beyond puzzled.

"What were you thinking, going outside in your underwear?" I had thought maybe he was sleepwalking; it wouldn't have been the first time... or sleeprunning, in this case. But, nope! Not this time. He was wide awake.

"Mom, there was a jet flying over! I think it was an F16 fighter jet...sure sounded like it!" He was so excited. Big blue eyes stared back at me, as though this should explain running outside in his underwear.

"You could have put your robe on...or some pants. Leland, you can't just run outside in your underwear." I could see my words were falling on deaf ears.

"Mom, if I had stopped to put clothes on, I would have missed it". I couldn't argue with that logic. He was so serious. It was at that moment that I knew I would someday be a military mom.

Fast forward about twelve years and our Leland graduated from high school. He chose to go to college, instead of enlisting in the Air Force. At that time, there were some scary things going on in the world. I was shocked at his decision, but very relieved. In my heart, I knew my son was destined to be in the military, but I wasn't going to question his decision. The first year in college went fairly well, but each time I spoke to Leland, or when he came home, I knew he wasn't happy. His heart wasn't in it. One day, towards the end of his first year, Leland called me. He sounded happier than he had for a while.

"Mom, I wanted to talk to you about something". There was something new in his voice. I couldn't quite identify the difference, but it was there.

"Sure, honey. What's up?" I thought he was going to tell me about a new girl, or that his grades weren't where he wanted them to be. He had struggled with the fact that he was nowhere near the straight A's he had earned in high school.

"Mom, I spoke to a recruiter with the Air Force today. I wanted to let you know that I have decided on joining the Air Force, before I signed the paperwork." He paused for a second and I tried to grasp what he had just said.

"I'm going in on a delayed enlistment program so that I can finish the semester and get my stuff taken care of before I leave for basic training." I was in shock and didn't have a clue what to say.

"Honey, are you sure? I mean, I don't want you to do this because your grades aren't where you want them to be. Maybe you should give this more thought." I wanted to tell him that he just couldn't do this. The world was a horrible place and he would be in danger.

"Well, I just wanted you to know what my plans were. Love ya, mom." He hung up...

Instantly, remorse washed over me. What was I thinking!? My son had just shared the biggest decision of his life with me and I had asked him if he was sure... I realized what the difference in his voice had been. He felt confident and proud of the path he had chosen. He had made his first major decision as an adult and he had called to share it with me. I didn't know how to fix what I had done, but I had to try.

I dialed Leland's number with trembling fingers. I had no idea how he would respond, but I had to apologize. When he answered, I bit back the tears, the maturity in his voice a grim reminder that my little boy was now a man.

"Leland, I would give anything if I could take back everything I said. I'm so sorry." No longer able to control the tears, I let them fall.

"I want you to know that I am so proud of you. This is what you have wanted your entire life. I won't lie to you, I'm going to worry about you, but you made the right decision, son, and I'm so proud of the man that you have become." I held my breath and waited for his response. I prayed that he could forgive my stupidity.

"Mom, I love this country and I want to defend everything she stands for...I want to protect my family. I want to be a part of something that's bigger than me." His sincerity touched my heart. I had never been more proud of my son than I was at that moment.

As I listened to Leland explain the delayed enlistment, and where he would go to basic training, my mind wondered back in time about twelve years, to the night a half naked little boy had run outside to see a jet fly over.

"You know sweetheart, someday, maybe I'll be the one to run outside half naked to see my boy fly over. I wouldn't want to miss you, by stopping to get dressed." We laughed and I felt as though my son had forgiven me. I still feel horrible for my response, but he knows how proud I am of him. He also knows that I still worry about him.

Leland decided to go into law enforcement instead of becoming a pilot. Eighteen years later and he's still in the Air Force reserves, always a military man at heart. But, for his day job, my boy is a federal agent, defending his country and protecting his family. He spent his entire childhood pretending to do exactly what he grew up to do. I couldn't be more proud.