I stand on the sand at the threshold of a wave. Water creeps to my toe and recedes. Gulls squawk and dip overhead. Down the shoreline I see a group of children in their brightly colored swim gear, water-wings like glossy bubbles surround their little arms. Their mothers stand in a group talking, always a watchful eye for their little one.

Far out in the ocean, I see two whales frolicking. A group of seals languish on a red buoy, occasionally a fight breaks out for territorial rights, then they are back to their royal poses.

I pick up a shell, remembering one so like it that we picked up as children and tried to hear the sea. I hold it to my ear, but there is nothing. These days, one is not supposed to collect shells, but I secret this one in my pocket, to join the piles I have at home.

Grey crabs walk their jiggling, sideways gait and pinch at birds that come near. The chattering birds seem to purposely frighten them into their clumsy scurrying run. A remnant of a sandcastle is being slowly decimated by the ever-rising tide. The sun hangs low - an orb of fire at the horizon, casting a pink and orange glow on the clouds. Soon it dips into the water and the sky begins to darken.

The laughing children are toted away by their mothers, some already passed out, against mother's sun-kissed shoulder; it's been a hard day in the sun.

I still linger as the sun dips completely below the water and the stars twinkle above.The light from a few campfires keeps the nearly silent beach from total darkness. The wind picks up and sends a chill through my summer clothes. I hug my arms to myself but still am loathe to leave the shore. A sudden cold surge of surf causes me to step back. The soft murmurings of lovers reaches my ears and I turn to see a tanned young couple kiss, faces lit by embers.

An unwelcome sob racks me, and I quell it immediately. I look down at the gilded box in my hands once more, then open it and let the ashes tumble onto our favorite beach. They mingle with the water and I feel a weight tug at my throat. The wind catches a bit of the ash, and it rides away on the air, somehow lightening my heart a little.

"It's good," I tell myself. "It's what he wanted," but inside I feel even more alone. I look down at the empty box and a tear cascades in.