Humor Fiction posted March 24, 2014


Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level
the complementary world of the retired couple

Sweetie Pie and Dearest

by mfowler

Where is She Coming From? Contest Winner 

"Dearest, would this be of interest to you?" I hate it when he calls me that. It makes me feel a million years old.

"No Sweetie Pie, I have one already," I call back in my sincerest voice. I haven't the foggiest what he's offering, don't care. When I'm writing, Sweetie Pie should not bother me. He knows my right brain is switched on, and I'm in creative mode. I've been telling him that for years.

I shouldn't be too hard on the poor old dear. He really doesn't have a right brain of any sort. Couldn't create green, if he scratched for hours with a blue and yellow colour-in. It's probably excusable to some extent, as he's been focussed on his accounting business for the past fifty one years. All he really knows is numbers, columns of them, red and black. What comes in, what goes out. I think he must be mind numbingly bored after such a profession, but he always says he loved the job. The left brain must be so big in his head, that the other hemisphere has shrunk to insignificance.

"Are you sure I can't interest you in one? Fresh out of the oven."

Now, why didn't he say so?

Since he's been retired, Sweetie Pie has taken to cooking. He's perfected a number of excellent savouries, some fine cakes, and now he's indulging himself in a 'round-the-world' cooking expedition. Last month it was Greek cuisine; this has been fine Italian food.

"I'll try one if you just pop it down by the computer. What is it?"

"Oh, I just whipped up some muffins. Would you like some of my freshly made home-grown apricot jam to go? Only just bottled it yesterday," he adds enthusiastically.

"Could I have one of those nice hot chocolate drinks you make so well too, Sweetie Pie? Please don't make any noise when you come in, I'm onto a great idea for my novel." He may be challenged in my world of ideas with its complexity and individuality, but he is terribly thoughtful for a man.

Now, where was I? This novel needs to be fresh, something contemporary, something that says this gal knows what makes relationships tick. "Thank you Sweetie Pie. Oh, that smells delish!"

"Dearest, I thought I'd pop down to the jewellers to get some parts. That antique Hanoverian cuckoo I've been fixing needs a couple of smaller cogs than I've got in the workroom."

"Do that dear. Run along now. I'm at a critical part of the process. Oh,.......... oh, by the way, will you be back for lunch? I'm looking forward to that anti-pasta that you promised yesterday. "

"Dearest, I was also thinking of whipping up some garlic bread, adding a little basil to set it off. Will that be OK?"

He has to be kidding. It sounds brilliant, but I try not to build him up too much, as I'd hate to see him fall in a hole if he fails to impress. "Whatever, Sweetie Pie. Now run along before my creative juices dry up."

It's good that he has something to fill his spare time. It gives me time to explore my inner self, find a voice where my ideas are laid out for all to share. I do hope Sweetie Pie finds a creative hobby to fill in his days. Alzheimer's is a real worry for those who don't use their whole brain.

Now let me see, " 'It was the best of times, it was the worst of times.' That's quite good. Does sound familiar, though............... 'It was the best of wines, it was one of his worst wines.'... Nah! I hate starting the first paragraph............................................My God that muffin is delish!"

Writing Prompt
Write a story that starts with the sentence: "Dearest, would this be of interest to you?"

Where is She Coming From?
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